Many people say that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is particularly difficult to handle, if you are not careful, you will be in a state of fire, even if you are harmonious at the beginning, after having a child, there will be contradictions; mother and daughter are different, even if they quarrel viciously in front of their faces, they will not put it in their hearts.
In the past, when she heard this, Sissi just smiled disapprovingly, until she also had a child, and even almost died in the confinement of the month under the "care" of her mother-in-law; after 3 months of enlightenment from her mother, she came out. It was then that she realized that some contradictions were really inevitable.
One of the differences: about spawning
Xi Xi has always thought that giving birth to a child is a matter for the couple, and she also discussed with her husband early in the morning to adjust her body first, and then consider pregnancy after half a year. Who knows, the mother-in-law was actually the first to jump out to oppose, and did her best to promote it.
Sissi and her husband are high school classmates, and when they got married, they did not have a marriage room and lived with their in-laws. Xi Xi worked in the township, only returned home on the weekend, and in the 5th month after marriage, her mother-in-law was not happy, and she said that Xi Xi was a hen who could not lay eggs. Sissi's husband explained to her that it was his idea to consider pregnancy after half a year of marriage, but she insisted that her son was seduced by Sissi. The mother and son quarreled over this, but the mother-in-law turned the spearhead and decided that it was the ghost of Sissi.
Sissi has mustard in her heart, and her relationship with her mother-in-law is somewhat cold.
However, Xi Xi's mother saw that Xi Xi had been sullen and unhappy, and on the one hand, she advised her to think about her husband and honor her in-laws, and on the other hand, she instructed Xi Xi to raise her body well, so that she would not suffer from sin after pregnancy.
The second difference: the diet during pregnancy
In the 7th month of marriage, Sissi became pregnant. The taste changes greatly, I used to love to eat sour, now I can't eat a bite, and because the spleen and stomach are not good, after pregnancy, Sissi's appetite is even worse, pregnant to 3 months, the whole person is not only not long, but lost a few pounds.
The mother-in-law was very unhappy, saying that Xi Xi was just pretentious, and she was very dissatisfied with Xi Xi's diet of only eating nutritional supplements and green cabbage, requiring her to eat meat, and stuffing it into her stomach, otherwise the child would not grow well. Sissi is also not allowed to open her own small stove at home and is not allowed to eat out. As a result, Sissi vomited in the dark.
Mom was particularly distressed and said to Sissi, mother-in-law is also afraid that you are not nourished enough, don't blame her. Come back on the weekend and eat what your mother made for you. Sissi held the bowl in her hand, and the tears swallowed into her stomach.
The third difference: the production method
Xi Qian's fetal position is not correct, she encountered difficult childbirth, and she did not give birth to the child for a day, and the doctor was in a hurry: the needle that should be hung was also hanging, and the way to think of it was also thought of, and then delay it would be dangerous. Sissi asked her husband to sign the autograph, the cesarean section, the mother-in-law did not agree, and was angry with Sissi.
The section was still cut, and fortunately it was cut: the child's umbilicus was around the neck 2 times, and the fetal position was not correct. It's just that the child is a bit small, less than 6 pounds.
From the beginning of the operating room, the mother-in-law's accusations have not stopped: the doctor is just scaring you, and you are stupid to believe it? Look at my grandson, how much sin he suffers, how good it is to have a child, and how smart it is to have a child.
Xi Qian's mother touched Xi Qian's angry little face and comforted her: the older generation, the old thinking, thinks that normal childbirth is the best, she is also distressed about the child, don't go to the heart.
Later, I heard my sister say that when Sissi entered the operating room, my mother was frightened, after all, Sissi grew so big, and she had only hit 2 times.
Difference four: hospital care
Because it was a caesarean section, Xi Xi recovered relatively slowly, and her sister only lived in the hospital for 4 days in normal delivery, and when she was discharged from the hospital, she jumped around alive; Xi Xi lived for 6 days, and when she was discharged from the hospital, she walked like The Palace of Yan Wang.
Hospitalized for 6 days, mother and husband took turns to take care of 6 days, mother-in-law responsible for cooking, delivering meals, staying in the ward for less than 8 hours, every time I came, the first time was to see the children. Even so, Sissi also ate 4 meals at home, 4 meals of porridge. After that, the mother-in-law said that she would not cook, and her husband gave her a takeaway, and Xi Qian went down with tears.
Sissi thought to herself, her mother-in-law is not retired and wants to go to work, and she cannot be blamed. Who knows, the husband said that he missed his mouth, and Sissi knew that her mother-in-law took 10 days off and slept peacefully at home, saying that waiting for Sissi's mother and son to come home would disturb her sleep.
On the day of discharge, the sister and brother-in-law came to help, the husband and mother-in-law collected their things and left, throwing Sissi who was holding the child on the wind outlet, or the sister and brother-in-law brought a hat and scarf to send Sissi mother and son home.
This time, Sissi only later heard her sister say that her mother had been crying for a long time.
Difference 5: Postpartum depression
Sissi was sick, sick 2 days before discharge, she was tired, but could not sleep; she had many grievances but could not say; she became taciturn, breastfeeding mechanically every day, walking around the house like a ghost to coax the child.
The child is too difficult to carry, crying during the day, crying at night, she does not want to talk, does not want to move, full of thoughts about how to end. She was too tired, kicked her husband up at night to coax the child, and in less than two minutes, the mother-in-law would rush in and accuse the child's mother of being cruel, and once instigated the couple to sleep in separate rooms. Xi Qian looked at her husband quietly and only said one word: Sleep in separate rooms? Okay, you bring the kids!
30 days of paternity leave, the mother-in-law instigated her husband to ignore Sissi, and she was also divided into rooms.
Sissi knew she was sick, and she ran uncontrollably to the top floor, eager to try it over and over again at the window. The mother-in-law blamed her for letting the child blow a cold wind, and the husband did not notice her abnormality.
Instead, the mother found the clue from the phone, took Sissi's mother and son home, and guarded her every day, helping her with the child, cooking for her, and accompanying her to relax.
Sissi gradually walked out of numbness and depression, cried fiercely, and finally got better.
Since then, XiXi has been kind to her mother-in-law, not squeezing or accommodating. Others, how to do, but also full of momentum and mother-in-law quarrels several times, the husband has been well educated a few times, the root of the ear is finally quiet.
Some people say that the difference between mother-in-law and mother is that the mother-in-law always feels sorry for her son and grandson, and thinks that the daughter-in-law must take good care of her son and raise her grandson; the mother always starts from the daughter herself, and what she cares about and loves is the daughter herself.
People's hearts are originally biased, and it is not wrong to be partial to their own flesh and bones, not to mention that not all daughters-in-law can be fortunate to meet a good mother-in-law. It is better to look at the opening point, I am fortunate, I must not and do not force, live separately, treat the mother-in-law as a guest, a distinguished guest, since it is a guest, the decency that should be given cannot be less, and what should not be given does not have to be wronged by itself.