Emotions are not reasons, and the lack of the ability to control emotions is the root cause. Some couples quarrel, although they will argue with reason, but the feelings are getting better and better, because there is relative restraint, turning reasoning into a crazy way of communicating.
Be able to know each other's true thoughts, eliminate misunderstandings between each other, and cultivate a special tacit understanding through quarrels.
If, emotionally, two people are completely out of control, only attacking and hurting each other, even if they can reconcile, they will definitely leave trauma.
So it's not emotional, no matter what the behavior is excusable, it feels reasonable.
Quarrel is also a science, if you want to master this knowledge, you must first of all have the original intention of solving the problem, rather than when you are emotional, forget what the quarrel between the two people is because of, completely abandon the problem and become a fight between each other.
Husband and wife quarrel, although it is very normal, but also depends on how you quarrel, all irrational behavior, is a thunder for the future.
Husband and wife quarrel, there are really three big taboos, it is best not to make a mistake!
1. Drop things.
Whoever drops something, it's nothing more than making your partner more angry. Originally the mood is very unstable, and then hearing the harsh sound, thinking of the loss of property, it is easy to completely lose your mind and become crazy, and the result is to lead to an infinite escalation of contradictions.
Originally, the quarrel may only be because of some small things, but as long as one party drops something, the small things will be infinitely big, and it will be difficult to end it again.
Obviously, this is irrational and unintelligent behavior, because it has been far away from the original intention of solving the problem and has become emotional catharsis.
Although dropping things may make you feel happy when you are emotionally up, is it really not enough? If you want to live on it, do you need to buy it again afterwards? This made it even worse for families who were not very wealthy, and even had to tighten their pants and belts for many months.
The lack of income in life is also easy to make people feel inexplicable emotions, and then because of some small things, continue to fight together, a vicious circle continues.
If when you drop something, the other party stimulates you with some words, such as dropping the mobile phone, smashing the TV, what is it, and having the ability to tear down the home, what will you do if you are angry and aggressive? It is really a dilemma, there is no step down, which is equivalent to lighting a fire emotionally.
There is no big deal in the first place, and as a result, the neighbors know it and will be seen as a joke, so don't get away with it, always have the attitude of making big things small things small.
2. Running away from home.
When the emotion comes up, you say you can go, but it will leave the other party with a sense of pain that cannot be cathartic. Maybe you just threaten and threaten the other party by running away from home, but in fact, the other party will only be more annoyed and angry because of your behavior.
Run away from home at every turn, even if the other party is threatened, the consequence is to hide your true thoughts and can no longer have crazy communication with you.
This will lead to more and more misunderstandings between you, and the gap will become deeper and deeper, until finally, the other party is not willing to quarrel with you anymore, and also has an indifferent attitude towards the direction of marriage, and holds the attitude of living as a partner.
In nature, it is an escape, so that the other party has the feeling of throwing a fist hard, but it is like hitting a ball of cotton, and the anger in the heart cannot be vented.
So this kind of behavior is not solving the problem, but only creating a problem, generating a disappointment from the depths of the heart.
It's your home, no matter how fierce the quarrel, you can't leave your home, and the more you quarrel, the more you have to stick to your position.
Even going back to the bedroom and making noise behind closed doors is much better than running away from home. Although the conflict was avoided at the time, what happened next? If the problem is not solved, it will be deposited little by little.
The most important thing is that it is not safe, especially the quarrel at night to run away from home, originally you are also emotionally, in case something unexpected happens, regret for a lifetime.
3. Parents involved.
Two people quarreling, that is, two people quarreling, do not involve innocent parents, such as attacking and insulting each other's parents, to vent their emotions. Whatever the quarrel is, at this moment, the original problem is no longer important, but becomes an attack and killing between each other.
No one hears you insulting your parents, and you can remain silent, even if you are a good person, even if you are a weak person.
Next, it is not only that the contradiction will escalate, it will simply deteriorate to the extreme, and even fight with their lives.
In addition, do not alarm the parents, unless it is a matter of principle, otherwise the trivial noise, repeatedly alarming the parents, be careful to make the two families can not be peaceful.
Unless, of course, you really don't plan to live with each other, think about divorce, ok, definitely, sure.
You are husband and wife, the bedside quarrel and the bedside and the end of the bed, the previous second is fierce, after the reconciliation is still two mouths, no matter how big the contradiction is easy to solve, no matter how big the emotion is easy to digest. But if you alarm your parents, have you ever thought that the other party's parents will have an opinion on you directly.
How to face it in the future, how to get along? After all, people are eccentric, and husband and wife can directly turn the page, but parents and daughters-in-law and son-in-law do not exist in this piece.
The accumulation of piles and pieces will either erupt or collapse in the end, unless you are sure, it does not matter.
Don't take it seriously, nothing can stand the accumulation of time, be careful that you will regret it in the future. Husband and wife quarrel, this is not nothing, very normal, behind closed doors to quarrel, after the good couple, as long as you do not drop things, do not involve and alarm the parents of both sides.
No matter what happens, both people are easy to solve, and when the emotions stabilize, they will naturally make sense of everything, but if it causes harm, it is not so easy.
You will not really remember each other's vendetta, as long as it is not a principled injury, but the parents of both sides will remember. And it is also easy to cause parents to have opinions and opinions because of you, and this emotion will be deposited with the passage of time.
I am most afraid that when the time comes, you two still want to live well, but you are always embarrassed and miserable because of the problems at home.
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