3 signs that falling in love is getting better.

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Vol.91

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@Cheese

I have been with my boyfriend for more than two years, and I have reached the stage of talking about marriage.

We were together and he chased me.

My personality is more Buddhist, I rarely go crazy about a person or something, and I rarely express love.

When we first got together, he was very welcoming.

And I was overwhelmed by this enthusiasm and could only reluctantly respond.

After the love period is over, we are always in conflict.

He was always coaxing me at first, and I didn't pay much attention to his feelings.

Later, he also gradually became tired.

I began to change myself and control my emotions.

But he always said that I had not changed in the slightest, what should I do?

Cheng Yi answered

It's great that you're aware of the problems with yourself.

There are many people who don't even know what's wrong with them when they break up.

You also have a lot of solutions to this matter.

Like you said, you haven't responded to his enthusiasm, or not responded enough.

Then you can express your emotions through words or actions.

Let's say he gives you a gift, or he takes you out to play.

You can show more praise and praise for him than ever before.

In fact, in the end, he just wants to get approval from you.

You've been in a coaxed role, so it's easy to ignore how he feels in the relationship.

So don't you just start paying attention now?

You told me you felt there was something wrong with you.

You need to tell him more and let him know that you are reflecting on yourself.

And realized what the problem was.

Then there's action.

Just like he did to you before, give gifts and say a few sweet words.

I'm sure he won't be indifferent.

As long as he can clearly feel that you are getting better, and the relationship between the two of you is getting better, then the problem will be solved.

They are all people who long to be loved, and I hope that you can love each other well.

@Cat sex

The man's family has been urging the marriage.

But my boyfriend has been reluctant to mention marriage and rarely communicates with me.

I think he's not a natural communicator.

Whether his parents divorced when he was a child was an effect on his character.

When we were together, there was no contradiction at first.

But then I was not happy when I didn't go along with his wishes a little.

Then think I'm not doing well enough.

In the past, I took the initiative to reconcile with him, and now I am tired.

Is it his mental disorder, or did we really have a problem before?

The most important thing now is to find a new way to get along that is comfortable for both parties.

Instead of rushing to discuss marriage.

Not loving communication is a big problem.

Boyfriends don't like to communicate, and you'll feel like you're isolated from his world.

No matter what kind of emotional changes he has, no matter what kind of things he encounters in life and work, he will not share them with you.

You don't know anything about this person and this person's life, which is a terrible state.

It is said that two people in love should be the closest people in each other's lives.

But there's obviously something wrong with the two of you getting along, and you have to talk to him.

Tell him that this is a closed way to get along, which makes you very uncomfortable.

Every time you bow your head, you will also wear out your patience and enthusiasm.

If he doesn't make changes, it only means that two people are not suitable for continued development.

The process of falling in love is also a process of constantly finding problems and solving problems.

If it is irreconcilable, it only proves that they do not love each other enough.

Both sides have to try to make a change.

The big problem of not communicating, if it continues until after marriage, will definitely involve contradictions of all sizes.

I believe that the words of love in the hearts of two people can heal all kinds of psychological obstacles.

But if this rigid pattern continues, then I don't recommend you enter the marriage hall.

@Three sweet

After I met him on the chat app, the other person showed a clear liking.

The 5th time I met, I gave me a gift that I made by myself.

I was touched when I had just ended a relationship and had no intention of falling in love.

He is very mature, I am very naïve in my dealings with people, and I am more sensitive.

I found that the other party was not as enthusiastic as at the beginning, and I immediately began to have no confidence in myself.

On WeChat, I will chat briefly every day, but I will still habitually wait for him to reply.

Coupled with his low emotional intelligence, he will always subconsciously express that he does not care so much about him.

Maybe I have a lot of problems myself.

It's just that every time I want to let go of the meeting, I will like each other more.

Wouldn't it be better not to meet and break the alliance?

What should I do?

In the case you're talking about so far, the word I hear the most is feeling.

Whether it's your feelings or his feelings, or your future development between two people is in a vague state of feeling.

You have no concrete basis in reality, and no clear reason to convince yourself.

In this case, if you make a decision, it is actually easy to make a mistake.

The other party has a clear and specific action to show their good feelings.

It can also be understood that you have just ended a relationship.

So you're more sensitive to that.

Once you find that the other person is not as enthusiastic as at the beginning, you will immediately fall into self-doubt.

This is actually a self-denial mentality.

You first have to realize this and change it right away.

And like you said, you don't care so much about him in your dealings with him.

In fact, I want to get back 10% for myself.

But this kind of behavior can easily make the other person mistakenly think that you are not interested in him.

Have you ever thought that these childish practices will actually separate two people farther and farther apart?

I suggest you talk to him directly and openly.

You tell him explicitly that you like him too.

It's just that his recent hot and cold makes you confused, and I don't know if the two people can continue to get along.

Then see how he reacts.

Generally in this case, if the other party is willing to explain what reasons they have recently caused this.

Then you can prescribe the right medicine and find a solution to the problem.

Endlessly probing is more than asking bluntly.

Instead of you getting caught up in this kind of doubt and entanglement, it is better to ask him for a good time.

If after communicating with him, you find that he reacts mediocrely and is not so active in wanting to send you a message.

Then you just leave in a dashing manner.

In short, when you meet someone you like, don't pretend to be cold, don't deliberately say the opposite, do the opposite.

As long as you take it seriously, no matter what the outcome, I believe you will not regret it.

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