Hello, I'm learned.
Yesterday received a question, saying that his husband is a mother treasure man, feel that the days are almost over, the mother-in-law is like a monitor, all the time monitoring themselves and their husbands, what is the psychology of the mother-in-law?
Generally speaking, the mother of a ma treasure man will have the following three kinds of psychology.
First, Ma Baonan's mother is an extremely insecure person.
Before her child was born, her life was almost painful and struggling, no matter what it seemed on the surface, and she feared being abandoned by her husband, trying to control him in various ways, keeping him under his control.
However, she slowly discovered that no matter how hard she tried, her husband was out of her control, and even the harder she tried to control him, the farther away he was from her.
When she became pregnant and gave birth, she found that in this world, the only person in the world who could not leave her and could not betray her was this child conceived from her body, as the saying goes, "mother and child connect hearts", which is also taught to her by thousands of years of traditional Chinese "filial piety" culture.
The birth of the child also changed her life, healed most of her pain, and gave her more security, which she must firmly grasp. She focused all her energy on the child, trying to raise the child into a person she could rely on, a person who had the ability to rely on herself, and a person who would never betray herself.
Slowly in her life, the child replaces most of the functions and responsibilities that the husband should assume, the parent-child relationship transcends the husband-wife relationship, and this child is not only her child from a young age, but her other "little husband"!
Second, Ma Bao's mother is trying to emotionally manipulate her child.
She will constantly instill in her children "how difficult it is for moms", "moms are the people who love you the most in the world", "whenever mom will protect you, you also have to protect moms"...
Under her ear and ear and careful teaching, the attachment relationship between her and her child was strengthened and strengthened day by day, and she finally became the irreplaceable person in the child's heart. Even in the family, the child will become a strong alliance with her, fight against her husband together, and form a deformed family relationship.
Third, Ma Baonan's mother refuses to let her child "grow up".
No matter how old he is, whether he is married or not, no matter what job he does, no matter where he is, as soon as it involves his mother's problem, he immediately transforms into Superman and becomes the "little boy" who wants to protect his mother, and becomes the little hero in his mother's mind.
Ma Baonan's mother does not understand that every child will grow up and be independent of his parents. She refuses her children to grow up, and even more refuses to let their children be independent, because once the children grow up and become independent, they will leave her and she will become the insecure woman again.
Only if her child never grows up psychologically, he will never leave her, and he will always be her "safe harbor".
The above three kinds of psychology show that the mother of the mother treasure man will basically present a self-centered narcissistic personality. She had no idea how selfish and cruel she was as a mother, who had kidnapped her child with what she called "love", imprisoned her child's heart, and left her in a long period of suffering.
She will not understand that when the child grows up, starting a new family with another woman is the most important thing to do, not for her and her wife to fight and be conflicted.
Ma Baonan's mother, for the sense of security in her heart, not only ruined her own married life, but also ruined the marriage and life of her children.
Have you ever met such a woman in your life?
I am learned. Learn love, harvest love, and achieve a good marriage and family life.