1, my wife went abroad, the family left me and my mother-in-law two people, my mother-in-law is 48 years old this year, looks still charming, because my father-in-law left early, so my mother-in-law has been single, mine

1, my wife went abroad, the family left me and my mother-in-law two people, my mother-in-law is 48 years old, looks still charming, because my father-in-law left early, so my mother-in-law has been single, my mother-in-law in a company as a financial director, the ability is very outstanding, the income is also very high, so there are many bachelors want to pursue my mother-in-law. But because my wife was not happy that her mother would find a stepfather for herself, she has always opposed her mother's remarriage. This time my wife went abroad, and many bachelors felt that there was an opportunity, and they all flocked to my house to propose to my mother-in-law. My mother-in-law was embarrassed to face such a scene, so she asked my son-in-law to come forward for her. In the end, I worked out of the shadows, selected the chairman of our company, and let him and my mother-in-law come together. Our chairman promised me that when he retired, the whole company would be taken care of by me. I'm so witty!

2. My sister has been busy at work recently, so she gave me the task of picking up and dropping off her niece. On the way, I had a good conversation with my niece, and when she reached the school gate, she suddenly stopped. Then the mysterious ear said to me: Auntie, I have mastered 18 kinds of baby coaxing skills, and now I will send you to give me a baby. Hearing this, I immediately burst into tears: Your aunt and I have mastered 18 kinds of skills for giving birth to babies, and now I am a bad man!

3. I have been living with my girlfriend for a long time and have been eating at a nearby restaurant. One day my girlfriend was going on a business trip, but her cousin was going to travel here, so I took care of it and had a meal. So I took my cousin to dinner at the restaurant where my wife used to go. The boss greeted me when he served the food and said: Didn't bring your wife here today?? I was just about to answer when my cousin slapped the table and yelled: The old woman is his wife, who are you talking about? The boss was stunned and immediately withdrew. I looked embarrassed and asked my cousin why she was making such a joke, and my cousin said you'll know. After eating the checkout, the boss said: I really can't stand my brother, this meal counts as mine!!

4. The weather suddenly began to rain heavily, and many gloomy trees that claimed to be 10,000 years old actually floated up. The old knotty skewers of the famous skewer shop are also full of houses, which makes the antique street big!! The divisions were quite embarrassed and rushed to the rescue. Unexpectedly, I went into the water to fish for a sunken wood lion, and my own gold chain also floated. The scene was chaotic, and when everyone was six gods and no master, the owner of the walnut shop was screaming. Say: Please God don't rain, when it rains, my walnuts and I are going to sprout, how can I sell them?

5. After the father-in-law retires, he can receive a pension of 36,000 yuan every month. Today my father-in-law married the money and planned to deposit it in my mother-in-law's bank card. When he arrived at the counter to ask for a transfer, the beauty at the counter asked him if he recognized the person. My father-in-law said: Of course I know, that's my wife. The counter beauty said: That is definitely not a scam, is it?? My father-in-law was stunned for a moment, and then said: She has cheated me of too many things, not bad for these few dollars. The counter beauty said confusedly: Aren't all good friends like this?

6, the wife went out to carefully hit a car, helplessly can only call the insurance company. Wife: Husband, I just drove someone else's car, what can I do? Me: It's all right, didn't you buy insurance at me, what kind of car is across the street? Wife: The owner told me it was a Koenigsegg CCX R. I was silent for a while and said: Wife, now our family has only two choices. Brother one is that you pretend to be drunk driving full responsibility, file for bankruptcy, I let the company prepare 600W cash for you. The second article is to file for bankruptcy tomorrow, and our company will go bankrupt with you.

7. The husband died of anesthesia overdose when he was doing the ligature surgery, and the brother-in-law became the heir of the listed group. Since the brother-in-law became the chairman, he has successively recruited a lot of doorkeepers. The brother-in-law showed them a photo album with pictures of all his relatives. Then the brother-in-law instructed, "See clearly, I will not see any of them coming." ”?

8, sitting on the bus, confused into sleep, a nightmare that made me go to hell woke me up, opened my hazy eyes, everything in front of me surprised me, the seats on the bus were empty, the car was still running but could not see the driver, even the steering wheel was not, I stood up in horror but could not find the door, only found a downward escalator, is this ladder ...? I tentatively looked down the escalator and a female flight attendant shouted to me, "Be safe!" Help! "Oh! I was on a double-decker bus.

9. After being admitted to a university, our new students must participate in military training. I fell in love with the girl in the class next to me at first sight, and then I went to confess. The girl shyly said that she should think about it and let me go to her when the military training was over. Half a month passed quickly, and I ran to their class happily, but I couldn't find her. Because everyone in the military training was tanned, I couldn't recognize which girl was confessing.

10. When my cousin was in his second year of high school, the chemistry teacher called his aunt's house: "Wang Xiaoming, you score 39 points in chemistry." "The cousin is confused, and his chemistry score has not been lower than 90 points. The uncle asked, "Who called?" The cousin said weakly: "Chemistry teacher, I scored 39 points in chemistry." My uncle's face turned black as soon as he brushed it, looking for hangers everywhere. After a while the phone rang again, and my cousin answered the chemistry teacher: "Make a mistake, your chemistry score is 93." Cousin: "Chemistry teacher, I thank you!" ”

11, my son is on summer vacation, all day wrapped in TV to watch endlessly, in the afternoon I asked him to write homework. The son said unhappily: "The summer vacation is long, let's write it tomorrow." I scolded angrily, "Why don't you learn from your grandfather?" If he hadn't studied hard as a child, would he have been able to become an engineer? The son muttered, "It seems that you didn't study hard when you were a child, otherwise why wouldn't you be an engineer?" I listened, and my eyes widened in anger: "Can your father compare with my father?" ”

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #