A week has passed since Liu Xuezhou committed suicide, and I am still heartbroken and unable to calm down.
At the end of the year, coupled with the Winter Olympics and the epidemic situation one after another, although the three words "Liu Xuezhou" once rushed to the hot search, they eventually became a paragraph of text on the Internet and slowly disappeared into the endless torrent of information.
Liu Xuezhou is dead, but his story should not be forgotten.
1. Who is Liu Xuezhou?
His Weibo introduction is "Hebei Xingtai Looking for Relatives Boy", who has been seeking the warmth of family affection all his life, and the short 8 words almost summarize his life.
If Sun Haiyang and his son Sun Zhuo are blessed on the A side, then Liu Xuezhou's encounter is like the complete opposite of the B side.
The story begins in 2006.
At this time, Liu Xuezhou's biological father Ding Mou had already experienced two marriages, and in the case of divorce and a son, he met Liu Xuezhou's birth mother and gave birth to Liu Xuezhou without marriage.
According to Ding, because there was no money as a dowry at that time, Liu Xuezhou's grandmother's family did not agree to the marriage of the two people, so the biological parents decided to sell Liu Xuezhou in exchange for 6,000 yuan to the birth mother as a dowry, which promoted this marriage.
In this way, Liu Xuezhou, who was born just three months ago, was adopted by his adoptive parents and brought from Datong, Shanxi to Xingtai, Hebei.
To tell the truth, in addition to being poor, the adoptive parents' family is not bad for Liu Xuezhou.
When Liu Xuezhou was four years old, his adoptive parents both died in a fireworks accident, and Liu Xuezhou had to be raised by his adoptive mother's sister and parents. In a long weibo post at the end, Liu Xuezhou described in detail his situation and mood at that time.
Obviously, he has parents, but he has become an orphan, and Liu Xuezhou's growth path is destined to be not good.
The second grade began to live in school, was bullied in school from an early age, transferred five times in six years, and only met a teacher in the sixth grade who gave him the few warmth in his life.
However, after a short period of warmth, Liu Xuezhou was once again violated by a perverted teacher and once wanted to commit suicide, but he finally survived.
2. The road to find relatives.
Because he was said to be a child in the village since he was a child, Liu Xuezhou tentatively asked the old man in the family, and it turned out that he was really not the child of his adoptive parents.
In fact, at this time, he still had a glimmer of hope in his heart, hoping that he had been abducted and that his biological parents were looking for him, so he went to collect blood and joined the blood bank, looking forward to the day when his biological parents could find him.
Seeing the news that Sun Haiyang found his son strengthened Liu Xuezhou's idea of finding his biological parents.
Originally, he wanted to pin his hopes on the Internet, but his grandmother (the breadwinner) felt sorry for him and took out a vaccine book. He learned that his original name was "Ding Jing".
Here's a passage that really hurts me.
When he knew that he had a vaccine book, he was already sure that he was not trafficked, but abandoned by his parents. But he didn't give up, lying to himself that maybe the vaccine was fake.
When he searched for the name of "Ding Jing" on the Internet, he found that it was all blank, and once again decided that "Mom and Dad may not be looking for me."
Parents like Sun Haiyang, the child is lost, as long as there is a glimmer of hope will continue to look for, the entire network can find the child's information and parents' contact information.
I am really sad to see this, one is sad for the indifference and ruthlessness of my biological parents, and the other is sad for Liu Xuezhou's intelligence and understanding. But if he could be a little smarter, give up unrealistic fantasies about his biological parents, think of a pair of parents who have abandoned him once, and abandon the second time is also predictable, then he will not go to the end of the road.
But the more a person lacks something, the more he wants something, and after all, he is still a child. There has been no parental love for more than ten years, and suddenly there is news from my parents, how can I not long for a warm harbor and a home of my own.
Using the name on the vaccine book, Liu Xuezhou quickly searched for the information of the birth father and successfully found the birth mother. There is no surprise of a long-term reunion, no happiness that has been lost and regained, from recognizing relatives to blacking out, every step of the parents is for their own sake, before and now.
At this time, Liu Xuezhou's biological father and mother had already divorced and formed their own families. The biological father took the police to a confession ceremony together.
The birth mother took the opportunity to celebrate her youngest son's birthday, met Liu Xuezhou by the way, and did a kiss show.
On the one hand, the younger son celebrated his 12th birthday, and 8 tables of wine were laid out without blinking an eye. On the one hand, Liu Xuezhou has only had two birthdays in the past ten years, and the treatment of two children of the same mother is very different.
Liu Xuezhou's appeal to his relatives is to have a home of his own, but the understanding of his birth parents is to buy him a house, so the next step is that his birth mother blackmailed him, and his biological father said that he sold miserably for money.
The reaction of his biological parents, coupled with false media reports, pushed Liu Xuezhou to the cusp of the Internet storm.
He fought back very hard.
At one point, he even decided to sue his biological parents. But considering the four siblings, the complaint was abandoned.
At this time, a wave of "human awakening" jumped out and said, "If you lose your pain, if you win, you will still suffer.
Do not persuade others to be good without suffering. I don't know if the "sober people on earth" who stand and talk without waist pain have ever thought that he is just a teenager.
3. The love of parents is the child's initial belief.
In the more than ten years of Liu Xuezhou's growth, the hardships and hardships experienced will certainly not be less, why didn't he survive this time?
Because no matter how sad he was before, he still believed in love in his heart, including mentioning in his suicide note that his adoptive mother did not forget to comfort himself after being injured by the explosion, indicating that he had once felt the love of his "mother".
Later, he could feel his aunt's love for him, but in the process of finding his biological parents, these loves were lost little by little.
No matter how much others treated him, the parents who gave him life treated him like this, which undoubtedly pushed him into the abyss of despair.
For underage children, parents are their only hope, as long as one of their parents can give him a little warmth, Liu Xuezhou will not have no memory of this world.
Forcing a child to admit that his parents do not love him, how desperate his heart will be.
I wrote an article of the same name in 2018, and readers read the article a long time later.
It is not unique to see that parents who do not love their children, or do not feel that their parents love their children, and their unfortunate childhood will take a lifetime to heal.
Parents are adults, and they and their children are inherently unequal. Parents' love for their children can lie, cover up, escape, or just lip service, but at the beginning of a child's life, it is dependent on the parents to survive, so the child's love for the parents is innate and cannot be chosen.
In other words, "no parent does not love children" is the initial life belief of every child, so let the child admit that his parents do not love himself, which is the collapse of faith.
How desperate the child is to force the child to admit that he is not loved by the parents.
4. The boy who tried to live as a beam of light is gone.
Regardless of the fact that his biological parents have ignored it for more than ten years, Liu Xuezhou has also grown up very well, he strives to become positive and sunny, and when he posts his award, he says that these are all spelled out little by little in the dark.
His ideal is to be a teacher, and he not only wants to live to be the light that illuminates himself, but also wants to use his own light to illuminate more people.
Unfortunately, his current light was still too weak to illuminate his own path after all.
Some netizens have summed up a wave, in addition to his biological parents, Liu Xuezhou also has a half-brother, a half-brother, a half-sister, and a half-brother.
There were so many of his relatives in this world whose blood was thicker than water, but none of them had a place for him.
Liu Xuezhou's death really made me too sad, sad to let a child who was so kind, so smiley, and so hard to live, finally left this world with hatred.
The title of his last text, "Born light, time is pure," is a self-justification of death and a punishment of his biological parents.
I must write his story down, although I can no longer do anything for him, but let more people who have the same experience as him see it.
If the child sees the story of Liu Xuezhou, then please understand that not every parent loves their child. Parents do not love themselves, you can be sad, you can despair, but do not give up your life, after all, your parents are only the people who brought you into this world, not all of you. Please believe that if your parents don't love you, there will still be more people in the world who love you.
If adults see the story of Liu Xuezhou, please think about it before giving birth to a child, whether the arrival of this child is purely for their own selfish desires, or hope that someone can accompany them to spend an irreplaceable time in life.
If you decide to give birth to a child, please do your best to love him, poverty, disease, hardship is not an excuse, as long as you give them a little love, you can become an immortal light in the lives of children.
PS：
In the last few days of his life, Liu Xuezhou sent a lot of photos, still trying to smile. Moreover, each Weibo is also equipped with an English letter, and these letters are connected to the word Rebirth, Reborn.
Combined with what netizens commented on his Weibo, he has become a beautiful tiger baby and has to let me break the defense.
Such a good child, just gone, did not even wait for the Spring Festival in 2022.
Author's introduction: Chen Yan, love gossip, love movies, love children, love yourself more. The new book "Real Education in the Family" is listed simultaneously on the whole network.