1. There was a young woman in the unit, divorced for two years, I wondered if I could catch her, and I went directly to her house one night. She was having dinner alone, and when she saw me, she smiled and asked

1. There was a young woman in the unit, who had been divorced for two years, and I wondered if I could catch her and went directly to her house one night. She was eating dinner alone, and when she saw me, she smiled and asked, can you have some wine? I said that I can drink a little, but it is the amount of three or two. She smiled and said, that's much better than me, and I'll have a drink. I smiled and said, then the two of us who can't drink well are drinking together, and it won't be long before we get drunk. She didn't care, she said, get drunk! As a result, before the bottle of liquor was finished, we couldn't do it. Two red clouds rose from her cheeks, and her eyes were confused, as if there were two pools of wine hidden inside. I also don't have the old reservedness and Sven, I looked at her directly and said, I like you for a long time, would you like to be my girlfriend? You give me a word. She shook her head and said, I don't want to be your girlfriend. I was extremely disappointed to hear that. Shaky ready to leave. But she grabbed me and said, I'm going to be your wife.

2. After three years of hard work in a state-owned enterprise, I finally became the director, and then invited a few colleagues to eat Haidilao. When it was over, I sent a beautiful female colleague home. When I got downstairs to her house, I turned around and was just about to leave, when she suddenly hugged me from behind and said: Stay, I want to sleep on your shoulders. I rejected her, to be honest, her family conditions are not good, I have never abandoned, mainly I am really not sleepy, ah, and then you pillow my shoulder pillow for a night, the next day I can still move bricks??

3. Hanging out in the supermarket yesterday and suddenly feeling a little hungry, I took a box of biscuits from the shelf and ate it. Just happened to be seen by the shopping guide next to me, and came up to kill me: "Look at you look like a dog, why are you so unqualified!" "I was just about to speak when the manager next to me hurried over. Yelled at her, "This is our chairman's son, what are you doing!" ”?

4. Go to dinner with colleagues, during the banquet a little sister told everyone a joke: handsome guys are called uncles when they are old, and di si is only worthy of being called a master when he is old. Everyone laughed after listening! At this time, a cleaning aunt walked past me, patted the back of my chair, and said, "Master, let me sweep the floor." In an instant, the whole table of colleagues laughed and fell to the ground!

5. When I was in college, the school grass was in the same class as me, and I always had a crush on him. In class yesterday, he was found by the teacher playing with his mobile phone and was lectured by the teacher while standing. The teacher said angrily, "If you go down like this, how will you make money in the future and how will you support yourself?" I slapped the table on the spot and yelled, "I'll raise it!" Suddenly there was silence in the class, and the school grass turned to look at me and slammed the mobile phone on the ground.

6. This afternoon, I saw one of the mobile phones one of the large groups said to party, I saw that there were many girls in it, so I signed up for a name, and the old rule was that men and women were free of charge. Something temporarily went a little late, and when I arrived, I had already eaten, and there was applause inside the moment I pushed open the door of the box. A pleasant girl shouted: Finally here comes a man! I said on a whim: I'm sorry, I went through the wrong door!

7. The cousin's domestic violence against the pregnant sister-in-law eventually leads to the miscarriage of the sister-in-law. The sister-in-law felt desperate, and divorced her cousin with a fierce heart. After his cousin was single, he went to work in a decoration company and fell in love with a divorced female boss. He drank some wine that day and finally plucked up the courage to confess to the landlady. Then looking sheepishly at her waiting for the answer, the landlady said, "Do you want to hear three-word Chinese or eight-letter English?" The cousin thought for a moment and said, "It's still eight-letter English." The landlady replied, "I AM SORRY." ”

8. My girlfriend took a fancy to the director of our company and invited me into the celebrity group and asked me to help match. I immediately arranged for them to meet, and my girlfriend said excitedly before going. But when I came back, I didn't speak, and I asked: What's wrong? Girlfriend: People didn't like me, but we sat together for 2 hours and talked, very happy. Me: Isn't that great? Girlfriend: After dinner, he asked me what time it was? I told him, he actually said to me, when the time comes, I'm sorry, my mother took my new iPhone 12, must let me sit for 3 hours! I:......

 #Funny##Funny paragraph# #今日笑料 #