In 2019, an old lady named Guo Qiaodi in Changzhou was lying in a hospital bed, and she was seriously ill and was afraid that she would soon die. Before the old man died, he had only one wish, that is, he hoped to find his son Wang Yongqiang, who had been missing for 20 years, and she wanted to see his son before he died.
What is unexpected is that Wang Yongqiang is actually a postdoctoral fellow at Peking University, and he is a postdoctoral fellow of the last century!
The old man searched all the people who could be found, including his son's classmates, teachers, and friends, hoping that they could help contact Wang Yongqiang, but found nothing.
Finally, the old man found the media and hoped to find his son through the media.
Guo Qiaodi
Soon, the news of Guo Qiaodi's search for her son was released in many media, attracting the attention of many netizens and readers. Someone found the old lady's son Wang Yongqiang in Atlanta, usa, at this time he was working as a software engineer at NCR in the United States, no need to ask, the salary of this position must be a lot of money.
In the face of the media to convey the old mother's dying request, the son who became a gold collar in the United States was unusually cold, and he did not even respond positively to the media, but conveyed the meaning through others: Please ask the family not to look for him again.
Someone asked Wang Yongqiang whether he could see the old man before his mother died. His answer was: It is difficult for a clean official to break the family affairs. This kind of answer to the question immediately caused the anger and accusations of many netizens.
Why did Wang Yongqiang lose contact with his mother for 20 years? And why did he refuse to see his mother for the last time?
Wang Yongqiang, born in 1969 in a poor peasant family in rural Changzhou, Wang Yongqiang has an older brother and an older sister, his brother has meningitis, and later suffered from angiositis, because the family is poor and has no money to see a doctor, and his brother is disabled.
In order to support the family's life, Wang Yongqiang's parents not only farmed the land, but also engaged in the business of selling rat poison, and the family life was particularly difficult.
In such a dilemma, Wang Yongqiang went from elementary school to high school, and without the support of his parents, he would definitely not be able to complete his studies. Wang Yongqiang relied on his intelligence and diligence to be admitted to Soochow University in the 1987 college entrance examination. College students in the 1980s were not the same as they are today, when college students were few and far between.
However, after Wang Yongqiang graduated from university, he did not go to earn money to support his family, but continued his further studies, finished graduate school, and then he was admitted to the Institute of Physics of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, and in 1997 he became a postdoctoral fellow at Peking University.
In 1999, Wang Yongqiang married the daughter of a professor in Beijing, and soon after starting a family, he and his wife went to Japan. Not long after in Japan, Wang Yongqiang completely disappeared. The family can no longer contact him, and Wang Yongqiang's home has not moved away, his parents and brothers and sisters are there, as long as Wang Yongqiang wants to contact his family, it is a matter of minutes, that is to say, Wang Yongqiang's disappearance is plain, that is, he abandoned his poor family and relatives in distress.
When Wang Yongqiang reappeared, he had already gone to Atlanta in the United States and worked as a gold collar there, of course, his appearance was not an active appearance, but "discovered".
Wang Yongqiang's social account abroad
What makes netizens even more angry is that after Wang Yongqiang was "discovered" in the United States, the only thing he said was not to ask his relatives if they were okay, nor to respond to the last time his mother saw him, but to ask his family not to look for him again, and he also moved out of the words "it is difficult for clean officials to judge family affairs", which is no wonder that some netizens called him "white-eyed wolf" and "cold-blooded".
In the midst of everyone's one-sided accusations and insults against Wang Yongqiang, Wang Yongqiang did not show up from beginning to end, and he never responded again. Soon after, the elderly Guo Qiaodi died of illness, and she died with deep regret.
Later, there was a person who stood up and spoke out, and this person was Wang Yongqiang's brother Wang Guoqiang. Wang Guoqiang said that he has always believed in his younger brother, and there is a reason why his brother has not been in contact with his family for a long time.
Since then, people have learned the other side of the matter through the media.
Although Wang Yongqiang has three brothers and sisters, in the minds of his parents, Wang Yongqiang's brother has a disability and needs to be taken care of, at least it cannot be counted on, and Wang Yongqiang's sister will marry out sooner or later, so they have pinned the hopes of the whole family on Wang Yongqiang.
The so-called pinning of hope on Wang Yongqiang, for Wang Yongqiang's parents, is not for Wang Yongqiang to study and go to school, but to hope that Wang Yongqiang will drop out of school early and assume the responsibility of supporting his family.
Although Wang Yongqiang read a postdoctoral degree, his parents did not support him from high school, and Wang Yongqiang won every time he went to school after "struggle" with his parents.
After graduating from junior high school, Wang Yongqiang's grades were very good, he was confident that he could easily enter high school, and he was also full of confidence in his future. But the family's difficulties make it impossible for his parents to support him to continue his education, because many children of the same age in the village choose to work outside to earn money, even if they don't go out to earn money, at least they can share some of the burden of farming, at least without spending money on school.
After Wang Yongqiang was admitted to high school, his parents proposed not to let him go, and told him, neighbors whose children are as old as you go out to work and earn money to support their families, what books do you still read?
But Wang Yongqiang is eager to learn, he learned from the teacher that "knowledge changes fate", Wang Yongqiang did not want to give up this opportunity to change his destiny, so he discussed with his parents that he could work and study in school.
His parents could not help Wang Yongqiang, so they had to follow him. Wang Yongqiang really fulfilled his promise, he worked while going to school, to put it bluntly, he provided himself with his own reading. At the most difficult time, Wang Yongqiang even rummaged through the garbage can to use the pencil head, but anyway, he finished high school.
The embarrassment of the family and the support of his parents have been transformed into the driving force for learning in Wang Yongqiang, who is eager to learn, coupled with talent, so his grades in school are always far ahead.
After the college entrance examination, Wang Yongqiang was admitted to Soochow University, in the last century, the promotion rate was still very low, admission to Soochow University is a glorious thing, so Wang Yongqiang did not go to college was not hindered by his parents, besides, the tuition fee for going to college at that time was not as high as it is now.
Although his parents did not oppose Wang Yongqiang going to college, they did not give him living expenses, Wang Yongqiang knew the difficulties at home, so he still worked and studied half-time like high school, anyway, he was used to such a life.
Wang Yongqiang studied very hard, and his grades were still far ahead in the university, so he got the highest scholarship, and with the money earned from part-time work, coupled with a not low scholarship, Wang Yongqiang's life could still be lived.
When Wang Yongqiang has more money, he will also send some money to his family, he would rather live a harder life, but also want to help the family share the poverty. However, Wang Yongqiang sent money to his family but was misunderstood by his parents, thinking that he had made a lot of money outside, so his parents actually took the initiative to ask Wang Yongqiang for money, saying that the family used money to buy fertilizer, and his brother used money to treat his illness.
But Wang Yongqiang, a college student, can earn hard money, and it is also limited, where does he have more money for his family? Parents don't think so, you used to have money to send to the family, and now the family is in a hurry, why don't you give it?
So Wang Yongqiang's parents came to Soochow University to ask Wang Yongqiang for money. Wang Yongqiang patiently explained to his parents that all the money I could send to my family was sent to you, and now I really have no money for my family.
Where are parents willing to believe? If Wang Yongqiang didn't give, they would quarrel and make trouble, and they would stay in the university and not leave. Wang Yongqiang is not living alone outside, he is living in the student dormitory, his parents make such a fuss every day, more humiliating, Wang Yongqiang has no way, he can take out all the money he can give to his parents, and he himself can only starve.
Wang Yongqiang completed his undergraduate studies with half-work and part-time studies, and continued to study for graduate school. During this period, parents were very opposed, because after graduating from college, many people participated in the work, and participating in the work meant that they could earn money to support the family, Wang Yongqiang continued to study in graduate school, naturally can not help the family share more.
At that time, Wang Yongqiang's sister was already married, and his brother still could not earn money to support the family, and because of the disability to drag down the family, so his parents very much hoped that Wang Yongqiang could work a day earlier, earn money a day earlier, and make greater contributions to the family a day earlier.
Wang Yongqiang's letter to his family
When Wang Yongqiang was a graduate student, his subsidy was also increased, and he could receive 72 yuan a month, which was a considerable amount at that time. However, at this time, Wang Yongqiang had more eyes, he did not tell his parents about the increase in subsidies, he was afraid that he would attract more requests from his parents.
However, Wang Yongqiang's parents are very concerned about his income situation, and they do not know where to find out that Wang Yongqiang's current subsidy has increased, so they came to the school to find Wang Yongqiang and told him that you are now that the subsidy has increased, you should send more money to your family.
Wang Yongqiang told his parents that his current expenses are also large, and he cannot give more money to the family. The parents repeated the same trick, noisy and noisy at school. His parents said in public that he should have earned money to support his family, and now not only does he not help the family, but he also hides private money. Such a quarrel, the teachers and students all knew, making Wang Yongqiang extremely embarrassed.
Wang Yongqiang's parents used the greatest patience to wait for Wang Yongqiang to graduate from graduate school, in that year, there were very few people who graduated from graduate school, Wang Yongqiang should always be satisfied, it is always time to participate in work to earn money to support the family. Who knew that Wang Yongqiang had actually been admitted to the Chinese Academy of Sciences doctoral student, which could make his parents angry, well, you only care about going to school by yourself, regardless of whether your family is dead or alive?
Wang Yongqiang's father
When his parents knew about this, Wang Yongqiang had become a doctoral student, and his parents called him to withdraw from school, and Wang Yongqiang almost begged his parents, saying that if he finished his doctorate, his doctoral graduation salary would be higher. At Wang Yongqiang's becking, his parents finally stopped asking him to drop out of school.
When Wang Yongqiang was studying for a doctorate at the Chinese Academy of Sciences, his parents kept making demands for him. You are now a doctor in Beijing, you know more people, you give your brother a way to find a job, where the relatives need to go through the back door, you look for the door... Requests such as these were made to Wang Yongqiang through one phone call after another.
At this time, Wang Yongqiang was a student after all, and if he had such great magical powers, he told his parents on the phone that he could not do these things. When his parents listened to him and thought he was pushing back, they were naturally annoyed and said that their sons were ungrateful.
In fact, Wang Yongqiang went to Beijing to study for a doctorate, half of which was to study and progress, and half to get rid of the entanglement of his family, and he really could not meet the endless requirements of his family.
In the blink of an eye, Wang Yongqiang reached the age of 30, and at the end of the last century, 30 years old was an older leftover man, and no one in the family worried about Wang Yongqiang's marriage, so he had to solve it by himself. Wang Yongqiang found a professor's daughter, which should be regarded as a high climb for a cold man.
In 1999, Wang Yongqiang wanted to hold a wedding ceremony with his wife, the ceremony was held in Beijing, Wang Yongqiang told his parents that he hoped that his parents would come to the wedding, but his parents asked him for 1,000 yuan for travel expenses.
You know, at that time Wang Yongqiang was still studying for a postdoctoral fellow, he could receive about 1,000 yuan in subsidies every year, he was now going to get married, no house, no bride price, marriage also had to spend a lot of money, in this case, the family also wanted him to send 1,000 yuan of road expenses, he could not always ask his father-in-law and mother-in-law to want it, Wang Yongqiang really could not get this money.
Wang Yongqiang could not afford to send 1,000 yuan to his parents, and his parents did not come to Beijing to attend his wedding, and the relatives from the Wang family at the wedding were only Wang Yongqiang's uncle.
After Wang Yongqiang married his wife, his life was careful, and it could even be said that he was walking on thin ice. His family is poor, his wife and father-in-law and mother-in-law are not abandoned, and if they are abandoned, they will not be able to get married, but Wang Yongqiang's biggest worry is that his parents may call him again to ask for money or let him help walk.
Wang Yongqiang was worried that after a while, he finally had the opportunity to work in Japan, and he also went to Japan with his wife. When he told his parents about going to Japan, they initially disagreed.
Wang Yongqiang told his parents that he can make a lot of money in Japan, he can earn 180,000 a year, you know, 180,000 20 years ago, that is a big number, Wang Yongqiang told his parents, wait until he earns money, buy them a big house, let them live a better life.
This time, his parents did not object to his going to Japan.
But as soon as I arrived in Japan, my parents' transoceanic phone call came, and the content of the call was naturally to ask for money. Wang Yongqiang sent some money to his family. But such calls still kept coming, and for Wang Yongqiang, he had long been accustomed to asking for money, but his wife was becoming more and more intolerable.
The husband and wife began to have contradictions because of this matter, the past contradictions between the husband and wife have not been resolved, the new money phone call has come again, and Wang Yongqiang's wife finally can't bear it anymore and divorced Wang Yongqiang.
Wang Yongqiang, who was divorced, made a new choice, he left Japan and went to work in the United States more distantly. Before leaving, he wrote off all the information in the country. Wang Yongqiang completely lost contact, and his disappearance was 20 years.
After understanding these internal situations, many netizens began to sympathize with Wang Yongqiang, and some people even began to accuse Wang Yongqiang's parents.
Although this matter has passed, it leaves a lot of people to think about. Wang Yongqiang's unremitting self-improvement is admirable. Wang Yongqiang also helped his family to the best of his ability in the early stage, which should also be affirmed. However, when his mother was seriously ill and dying, when he asked to see the last side, Wang Yongqiang fiercely refused, which was difficult for people to understand.
After 20 years of being lost, even hatred should be resolved, why can't we seize the last family affection and see the last side of our biological mother?
As for Wang Yongqiang's parents, because of family difficulties, it is understandable that they have made certain economic demands on Wang Yongqiang. But everything has a degree, and we can't ignore the son's endurance and feelings.
Wang Yongqiang's parents have the right to make economic demands on their son, but if this power is not abused in moderation, it eventually destroys the family relationship, and they are also responsible.