Jimu news reporter Xu Ying
On the evening of April 18, Zhou Guoping broadcast "How to Become a Good Parent through Reading" on the video number, talking about his newly published book "Knocking".
Zhou Guoping is a famous contemporary scholar and writer. Researcher of the Institute of Philosophy, Chinese Academy of Social Sciences. Born in Shanghai in 1945, he graduated from Peking University in 1967 and the Graduate School of the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences in 1981. He is the author of the academic monographs "Nietzsche: At the Turning Point of the Century", "Nietzsche and Metaphysics", the essay collection "The Distance of Watching", "Kindness, Richness and Nobility", "The Quality of Life", "Life Is Not Competitive", the documentary works "Lady - Notes of a Father", "Years and Temperament - Autobiography of My Soul", "Baby, Baby", poetry collection "Sorrowful Lust", etc. Zhou Guoping integrated philosophy and prose into one, forming a unique style of Zhou-style philosophical prose, which has influenced the reading of several generations, and there is a saying that "boys must not read Wang Xiaobo, and girls must not read Zhou Guoping".
That night, the reporter watched the live broadcast and felt more than the thinking of the philosopher, but the meticulous and considerate care of a father for his child.
Zhou Guoping called on parents to be the guardians of their children's childhood
Zhou Guoping shared in the live broadcast that his son was not a "good student" in the eyes of the teacher in school, or even a "poor student", because of his poor grades when he was in elementary school. "I'm worried, I'm worried not about the child's grades, but about whether his psychology will be hurt in this atmosphere of poor student evaluation."
Zhou Guoping said that many parents believe that their children's good grades can only have a career in the future. In his view, whether the child will be successful in the future has no direct relationship with the quality of the grades, not a positive correlation, nor a negative correlation. For the child, his happiness is the most important. In childhood, you must be healthy and happy. If childhood psychology is unhealthy and unhappy, then this psychological problem will erupt at any time in his life in the future.
Some netizens were surprised by the message: "The son of the writer can't write an article." Zhou Guoping immediately defended his son, saying, "Although the Chinese and English are not very good, his physics and mathematics are good, and his physical education is especially good, and he is the fastest runner in their grade." Some people joke that the writer's son can run. "Zhou Guoping said that every child is different, and you can't use a ruler to measure a child." My daughter has very good grades, so it would be very foolish for me to take this ruler and measure my son. Zhou Guoping believes that we should see what is shining in each child's body, and then let his shining things develop. What can achieve him in the future may be the place where he shines.
Zhou Guoping suggested that parents should be the guardians of their children's childhood, carefully observe their children, and do not evaluate their children from a particularly utilitarian secular evaluation system.
Raise boys without rushing
"My daughter's name is Chirping, and my son's name is Tapping. I wrote a book called Baby, Baby, which chronicles Tweet's childhood. Now this book, which records the childhood of percussion, uses the name of the protagonist as the title of the book.
In my lifelong experience, the greatest luck is to have a pair of lovely children. The wonderful thing is that the two children have very different personalities and are very interesting. Tweet is a little lady, introverted, quiet, and often a little melancholy. Percussion is a full sunshine boy, cheerful, happy to socialize, full of positive energy.
However, under the visible personality, there are actually the opposite factors lurking. We did not expect that this little lady, with a burning fire in her heart, would later grow into an avant-garde artist with a distinct personality. Nor did we expect that the path of this sunshine boy's growth would be particularly difficult..." Zhou Guoping wrote in the foreword to "Percussion".
"Percussion" contains a series of questions that parents may encounter, for example, under the pressure of life, should we welcome the arrival of new life? How is raising a boy different from raising a girl? How to not suppress the nature of children, but also gradually cultivate and enhance self-control? How to grasp the degree of freedom and rules? How do you talk about life and death with your child? These questions Zhou Guoping gave answers from his own perspective.
For example, what is the difference between raising a boy and raising a girl? He believes that "where in the world is there a unified way to educate boys, or girls?" Every boy is himself, every girl is herself, unlike any other boy or girl. All you can do is love this different, understand this difference, and let this difference become value. For parents, every child is a guest from a strange country, you are completely ignorant of this guest, you must be careful, slowly understand, find the most suitable way for him or her to grow. ”
Through the education of percussion, Zhou Guoping summed up the three main points of raising boys in the book: "First, in the growth of boys, the companionship of the father is particularly important; second, boys are active, weak self-control, how not to suppress the active nature, but also gradually cultivate and enhance self-control, is a difficult point in boys' education; third, boys have a slow growth rhythm, mental maturity is late, we must have full understanding and enough patience, not to rush to achieve results. ”
In the live broadcast on April 18, Zhou Guoping also shared this with netizens. "You've found an interesting phenomenon that in elementary school, girls mostly do better than boys, and in junior high school, it may be the same, but in high school, there will be a reversal. Girls mature early, boys mature late, boys stereotype late..." Such feelings have also been endorsed by some netizens.
This is the third book that Zhou Guoping has written for children
The reporter also learned that "Knocking" is the third book written by Zhou Guoping for his children.
Zhou Guoping's first book written for children was "Lady girl", which is a book with pain. In 1994, Zhou Guoping began to record "Lady Girl", which was published in 1996 and published in more than 20 years by different publishing houses. In 2010, Zhou Guoping wrote about the younger sister of the girl in "Baby, Baby", and this year Zhou Guoping wrote the younger brother of the chirping "Ding".
Zhou Guoping once talked about his feelings of family affection at the Beijing Book Fair 20 years after the publication of "Lady of the Girl", when the reporter was also present. Zhou Guoping said, "A person from falling in love, to getting married, to having children, this is a very happy thing in life." We must cherish such natural emotions, including love, including family affection, this thing is the most precious, we are often easy to see what happens repeated every day as too ordinary, too easy to get. In fact, the matter of the girl let me know that in fact, it is dangerous, and it may be lost. So cherish the time that loved ones spend together, it's limited and not infinite, and I think that's common to all people. ”