People who like to be gregarious and used to be alone, what kind of people do you think are really powerful?
Zhuangzi said: To go alone is to be unique. The unique person is the most precious.
Lu Xun said: Beasts of prey always go their own way, and cattle and sheep are herded.
In those who are strong, we always find something in common, that is, they are used to being alone, they don't care about the eyes of others, they have firm beliefs, and they have a higher self.
As the writer Zhou Guoping said in the book "When You Learn to Be Alone": Solitude is a necessary space for the growth of the soul, and when we are alone, we withdraw from others and affairs and return to ourselves.
It is deeply believed that only when a person is alone can he have time and energy to think and learn, and can he constantly enrich himself.
Some people may ask, in the fast-paced modern life, how to be alone? Multiple friends and multiple roads, can't you succeed without making friends and working hard alone?
Of course not, if you have read Zhou Guoping's "When You Learn to Be Alone", you will understand that being alone is not about not making friends, being alone does not mean being lonely, and a person really becomes powerful, starting from being alone.
The most important issue in life is "being yourself"
An important trait of those who are strong and capable is to know how to be themselves, to interact with them, and you can always feel their firmness from the heart.
They care more about their own feelings than in the eyes of others; they know better what they want and don't want; their friends are as good as they are, and they sincerely appreciate and respect each other.
Is it hard to be yourself? It's hard.
As Zhou Guoping elaborated in "When You Learn to Be Alone", if a person always lives according to the ideas of others, constantly running and busy, unable to think independently, and has no spiritual life, then this person's heart must also be barren, and you can't find what really belongs to him in it.
Such a person, even if he has more friends, will not feel happy and fulfilled.
As a group animal, people cannot have no friends, but if they lack the friend of "themselves", even if friends are all over the world, they are only superficially lively and innerly empty.
The most important point of "being yourself" is whether you find your true self and whether you can be friends with yourself, which is what Zhou Guoping said, "This self cares for the self that struggles in the world with a rational attitude." After all, it is only the self-lover who loves others.
Of course, self-love is accompanied by a cold-eyed bystander, not only loving yourself. We must understand that some pain can only be borne by ourselves, and some obstacles can only be crossed alone.
"Being yourself" is an important topic in our lives, once you find your true self, you will live more freely and comfortably.
How to "be yourself"? The key is to learn to be alone, to know how to be alone.
Solitude is a necessary space for the soul to grow
In the book "When You Learn to Be Alone", Zhou Guoping devotes a large section to the importance of being alone.
For those who do not have an ego, being alone is an ordeal that is unbearable, and even if there are conditions for solitude, they will not calm down and enjoy being alone.
What they fear most is "one person", as long as they are idle, they will definitely look for a place to pastime, either to go to a bar, or to find someone to team up to play a game, or to find someone to chat and brag.
People who are afraid of being alone, although they have friends all over the world and their days seem to be lively, their hearts are very empty.
The more you avoid being alone, the more you are afraid to face your true self, and over time, your heart will only become more barren.
For those who have an ego, being alone, although lonely, is the most beautiful moment in life and the necessary space for the growth of the soul.
Only by thinking about life in solitude can we have a real spiritual understanding; only by feeling the relationship between man and nature in solitude can we better understand the meaning of life.
Someone asked: I am too busy, all the time is packed with work, I can't find time to be alone.
If you're a person too busy to find time alone, think about it: Are you being persecuted by fame and responsibility?
Your busyness may not bring you happiness and achievement, you are just busy, there is no time to stop and think, it is difficult to think clearly, the so-called busy, what is it for?
More important than success is what is within a person.
Truly powerful people, no matter how busy they are and how much they love their careers, will reserve a certain amount of spiritual space for themselves.
In this space, they think calmly, enjoy a moment of tranquility, their souls grow, and they understand the meaning of life better.
When you learn to be alone, you can see your inner self
In his book "When You Learn to Be Alone", Zhou Guoping mentions "three personal pronouns", that is, me, you, and him, and suggests that each of us can look at ourselves in this way.
When we look at ourselves in the first person "I", it is easy for us to fall into a state of going our own way, accepting only what we think is right, love and hatred are clear at a glance, and it is easy to live blindly, so we must learn to look at ourselves from other perspectives.
When you look at yourself in the third person, you are actually looking at yourself from the perspective of others, accustomed to standing in the perspective of a bystander, and keeping yourself awake. But it is easy to fall into another kind of blindness - to live according to the will of others.
See yourself in the second person "you", the communication between "me" and "you", like a friend, sincere and considerate. When we stand tall and look far, it is easy to discover the "inner self."
Seeing the inner self and being brave to be yourself is not easy.
Many people like to go with the flow and do not want to make hard efforts, and many people dare not be themselves because of cowardice, fear of being discussed by others, afraid of failure.
Zhou Guoping proposed two ways to judge "whether to be yourself", one is whether you can be yourself in the attitude of life, firm values, principles and bottom line, and the other is whether you can have independent choices, do what you really like and invest in it.
In fact, the more people who are accustomed to being alone, the more they can see their inner selves.
When alone, you can read, you can meditate, you can admire works of art, and so on. The richer the spiritual life, the more you can feel the true self within.
Solitude is a process of inner self-awakening in which you feel the inner strength that gives you the courage to be yourself.
How can a person become powerful? Zhou Guoping gave the answer in the book "When You Learn to Be Alone" - only the strength of the soul is really powerful.
In this life, it is easy to make friends, but it is difficult to learn to be alone.
If you are not used to being alone, it is better to start now and try to give yourself the time and space to be alone and accept the gifts of life.
When you are alone, you may wish to read Zhou Guoping's "When You Learn to Be Alone", experience Zhou Guoping's views on solitude, and have an in-depth exchange with your inner self, which will definitely have unexpected gains.
Today's Topic:
Are you a person who is used to being alone?
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