It's a real thing.
In order to protect the privacy of the parties, I made the necessary obfuscations.
Eat melon or sigh,
I believe that after everyone reads it,
Will have its own harvest.
- Mother potato
"You won't let your sister give birth to a child,
Is it to make her no after?
She is old and has no children, you give her a pension?! ”
The mother-in-law rushed into the kitchen like a gust of wind,
Pointing at my nose and questioning loudly.
"Mom, I don't mean that.
I was just kind enough to remind her because..."
Before I could explain, my mother-in-law interrupted:
"We don't have to take care of our family's affairs!"
This is a scene that happened to my mother-in-law's house ten years ago.
Looking back now,
There will be a wave of grievance in my heart,
I felt that I was particularly stupid and stupid at that time.
To make this clear, we have to go back ten years.
Sister-in-law unexpectedly found out that she was pregnant.
Yuki was originally a good thing,
But she was taking medication for hyperthyroidism.
Among the adverse reactions of this drug,
Clearly stated may cause fetal malformations.
When she went to the consultation, the doctor's advice was: miscarriage.
As a medical student,
After I learned of this situation, I also suggested that she not stay.
Because I have a friend by my side,
Also in the first 3 months of pregnancy,
Took medication for hyperthyroidism.
Because it is an older pregnancy, I am reluctant to beat it,
The result is a chance of failure,
Children are born with facial deformities and mental retardations.
Later, the friend quit his job to take care of the children.
Her husband in order to support the family,
After work, I also went to drive a taxi in the evening.
Children are very poor, and adults are also very hard.
Although I understand that it is not good to persuade people to have an abortion,
But the example of a friend is there,
I really can't watch my sister-in-law step on the pit.
Never expected, my kind reminder,
Invited the mother-in-law to split her head and cover her face for a few times.
What I didn't expect was that
The sister-in-law did not take this reminder seriously at all.
Now that I think about it,
She may think that the child is fate,
That kind of misfortune with a small probability will certainly not fall on your own head.
Nine months later,
The sister-in-law's child was born as scheduled and was a boy.
The child looks a little strange except for the neck there,
Everything else is normal,
It's no different from a normal baby.
Everybody was happy.
I was also relieved,
Happy for my sister-in-law from the bottom of my heart.
But a few years later, the problem came.
When the child reaches the age of 2 and a half,
Can't talk yet,
Development is also significantly slower than in normal children.
By the age of 3, new problems have emerged,
The child begins to twitch frequently,
The sister-in-law and his wife took them to the hospital,
After a series of tests, the child was diagnosed with epilepsy.
Not long after the diagnosis,
My sister-in-law's husband went out to work.
I've heard my mother-in-law complain,
The child is so young, sick again, and needs to be taken care of,
What part-time work is actually that I don't want to carry the burden of the family anymore.
After that, the sister-in-law took the child and moved back to her mother-in-law's house.
In fact, at this time,
The child's illness is still very promising,
Doctors say that 50% of patients can be cured after formal treatment.
The premise is that it is necessary to strictly follow the doctor's instructions and carry out systematic treatment.
So that the child can recover,
My sister-in-law was also very attentive at the beginning,
You will give your child medicine on time every day.
The effect of the medicine is good, plus it is found early,
After the child insists on taking the medicine for a period of time,
The effect is noticeable, and the frequency of convulsions is significantly lower.
But something strange happened —
Before long, the child began to twitch frequently again,
Symptoms are more severe than before medication.
I think it's weird.
Because this medicine is symptomatic,
Just follow the doctor's treatment plan,
There should be no such iteration.
So I asked my sister-in-law,
How about the child taking medicine recently.
Unexpectedly, the sister-in-law said that she stopped the drug for the child...
The reason was that a neighbor said to her,
Eating Western medicine has great side effects, and long-term eating children will become stupid,
It is better to take Traditional Chinese medicine, there are no side effects.
She believed,
Just go to the "miracle doctor" recommended by the neighbor,
Took a bunch of unknown grass and came back to cook it for the child to drink.
After listening to me, I am really anxious, this is not a mess!
In a hurry, I forgot everything,
Speak out loud to her directly:
"There are people in the family who understand you don't believe, go and believe what others say casually!"
How can a child's medicine be stopped casually?!
Don't be blind, take the child tomorrow,
Follow me to our hospital,
Go to the doctor to see how to remedy it! ”
Who knows, the voice just dropped,
The mother-in-law rushed out again.
She yelled at me angrily:
"How do you talk?"
Your sister's own child, she doesn't feel pain, who hurts?!
In case the child is cured, are you responsible? ”
This time, I closed my mouth knowingly.
At this moment, my husband just happened to come back,
Saw this scene.
After he asked the truth of the matter,
Tell his sister that the medicine cannot be stopped casually,
Take your child to the doctor tomorrow.
The mother-in-law looked at her son and said the same thing,
I didn't say anything more.
And then later,
The child has undergone a long period of systematic treatment,
The epilepsy did not recur.
Unfortunately, intelligence is still affected by some,
Reading is a bit less than smart,
However, normal communication and life skills are OK.
My sister-in-law is very guilty about this,
She made up for it in her own way:
It hurts the child very much, the big and small things in life,
All rush to help the children do it.
The child is almost 10 years old,
She still helps brush her teeth and wash her face every day.
Dress, put on socks, and even feed.
I looked at it and felt very awkward,
The child obviously has no problems in taking care of himself in life.
The sister-in-law took care of him like this,
Not to help him, but to harm him.
So, when I saw my sister-in-law feeding my nephew again,
I couldn't help but nag:
"You let him come by himself,
It's always good for children to do more things on their own. ”
Unexpectedly, my sister-in-law suddenly changed her face,
Tell me:
"My child, you should take care of your own child!"
"I don't mean anything else.
Just hope that children learn to take care of themselves,
In this way, he can better live independently. ”
I explained.
"How will he be doing in the future,
What does it have to do with you?
I want you to be nosy. ”
The sister-in-law was even angrier.
"How busy am I?"
I was also angry and asked rhetorically.
Just when I wanted to go on and say something,
The afterglow of the corner of the eye suddenly found,
The mother-in-law standing by glanced at me with disgust.
This white eye made me completely awake.
For ten years, I myself have felt bitter,
But in their eyes,
I'm just a nasty, tongue-in-cheek person.
On that day, I returned to my own home, and the more I thought about it, the more aggrieved I became,
But it's not good to talk to your husband,
He asked his girlfriend out and told her the beginning and end of the whole thing.
Finally I complained:
"What's going on in their heads?
I am obviously well-intentioned,
If they don't appreciate it, forget it.
Still hate me so much,
It's like the child's illness is what I make. ”
My girlfriend asked me:
"You want me to scold them with you.
Or do you want to hear the truth? ”
I thought about it and replied:
"Then you can help me analyze it."
Girlfriend said:
"Your mother-in-law and sister-in-law are not wrong about this,
It's your problem.
Our Lady's heart is flooded and confused. ”
She just said this sentence,
I was anxious: "What do you say?"
My Virgin Heart?? I can't figure it out??? ”
My girlfriend motioned to me and listened to her first:
"There's a saying that goes,
Often compete with the same good, not with the silly X theory short and long.
Your mother-in-law and sister-in-law are obviously not the same person as you.
From ten years ago they decided to keep the children,
You can see it.
But what about you?
You always think you can point out your sister-in-law,
Rescue her from fire and water, isn't this the Virgin?
The days are all lived by themselves,
It doesn't matter how right you are,
In the eyes of your mother-in-law and sister-in-law, it doesn't matter.
So, sober up,
Go back later,
Don't care what people do with their children.
As if that were not the case,
It's time to eat, chat only to talk about happy,
In this way, everyone is harmonious. ”
A girlfriend's words made me suddenly remember,
It seems that this is really the case.
My husband has many brothers and sisters,
I also have a concubine who doesn't come back very often.
It was very popular with my mother-in-law.
Every time she went back to her in-laws' house,
To whomever speaks is affectionate,
But for the sister-in-law's child thing,
She never expressed any opinion.
When she went back,
Eating is eating, talking about homely after eating,
Just brush the phone and go,
Nothing else matters.
I've always felt,
The mother-in-law was intimate with her because she could talk,
Plus not coming back very often.
Now think about it again,
The secret of popularity is:
Regardless of the idleness.
Maybe, is it really my hand that is a little too long?
At this time, my girlfriend continued to give me a lesson:
"I used to be like you, everyone wanted to help,
But then I found out,
I can't control others, I can only manage myself,
At most, add your own little home.
Everyone has their own way to go,
Go your own way,
Don't interfere with where others go, whether they are crooked,
This is to do your own "life problem".
What is a life issue?
It's a question of who's responsible.
Like what
In the early years, your sister-in-law insisted on giving birth to a child,
After the child is born, the child has a problem, who is responsible?
It's her.
At most, you can only remind her, not help her make decisions.
Another example,
Now your sister-in-law does not cultivate the child's self-care ability,
When the child grows up, life cannot take care of itself,
Who pays for it in the end,
Or your sister-in-law.
These are your sister-in-law's life issues.
She did it herself,
Take responsibility for the consequences yourself.
I say this, it sounds a little cold,
But that's the way it is.
Whose life, who is responsible.
You just have to think about what your life topic is,
Just do your part.
If they really need it later,
As loved ones, we can help,
Try to help. ”
After talking with my girlfriend that day,
When I got home, it was late.
I sat alone on the couch,
Quietly thinking back,
What I have done in the past few years, and the "return" I have received,
Indeed, over the years,
I stretched my hand too long and the tube too wide.
I put my hand in my sister-in-law's life,
In the end, he was hated by others,
Nothing has changed.
At that moment, I figured it out,
A person's ability is indeed limited,
It is not easy to live your life well,
There is no need to interfere with other people's "life issues".
After all, at the end of the day,
In the end, you need to be responsible for your own life.
Hello, I am Li Diandian, 4-year-old daughter tomato, 9-year-old son potato ma ma, good at using comics and text to record the daily life of the second child chicken flying dog jumping, sharing hardcore learning resources and reliable, in-depth parenting dry goods.