01
When I was a child, I played the block game.
That is, just try to piece together three identical blocks and eliminate them.
In psychology, there is a theory called the "law of attraction", which is somewhat similar to the elimination square. In layman's terms, it is "near Zhu is red, and near ink is black".
When you're with people like that, you'll infiltrate each other and then break away from the big circle and build a small circle.
For a fifty-year-old woman, she must know how to make trade-offs, and what kind of life she will live for the rest of her life, and if she loses herself in the crowd, it will get worse and worse.
A writer said: "In the short decades of life, the most important thing is to satisfy yourself, not to please others." ”
In the first half of life, for the sake of family and life, children, I had to squeeze into certain circles. For example, many mothers have joined the group of educating their children, although everyone's views are different, they have always been ok.
In the second half of life, you must learn to please yourself, the following circles, it is best to stay away, do not let the "people around you" pull down your level.
02
First, the so-called "fashionable" circle loves vanity.
There is a song that sings: "Women love to be dashing, men love to be pretty." ”
People love beauty, and women's love of beauty is more prominent. Dress yourself up fresh and unworldly every day, wear high-end clothes, shoes are also newly bought, and your mood will naturally become better.
However, there are always some women, in the name of "loving beauty", doing things that "compare and lift each other". The thing of punching a swollen face and making a fat person can be done at any time.
One of my female colleagues, with poor family conditions and unpaid mortgages, went shopping every week and bought a dress.
The most incredible thing is that she often flips out the hangtag of her clothes for others to see. I hope that others will be jealous and envious of her.
Sometimes, she also buys some "chicken rib products", which may not be used once or twice in her life.
To be a fashionable woman, the direction is right, but the method should be appropriate. Fifty-year-old women, in the eyes of the ancients, are "Xu Niang and half old", excessive dressing, will lead to indifference, spend money to buy guilt.
Smart women, according to their financial situation, learn to live a simple life. Keep the money in your pocket, plan for the husband and wife to retire, and plan for the children to start a family.
The hypocritical "fashion" is easy to be seen through, but everyone does not say it. Behind the scenes, understand that people are "snickering". It is wise to stay away from "pseudo-fashion".
03
Second, the circle of heavy resentment, the people's hearts are very poor.
Fifty-year-old women, how fate, basically fixed, although it can be a big instrument late, but it is difficult.
If you look carefully, you will find that some women, at the age of fifty, are affectionate, harmonious, and children are angry; some women, divorced, divorced, children are also a mess, and their parents' attitude towards her is also very unfriendly; and other women, struggling in marriage, do not know where to go.
Different fates bring different moods. There are always some people who think that their lives are miserable, and everywhere they go, they have to complain, hoping to arouse the sympathy of others.
For very poor women, we have to give generously and help. But a woman who is poor and doesn't work hard, just reaches out and asks for it, and it's not worth helping.
As the saying goes, "Complain about the sky, complain about the earth, complain about yourself." ”
To open the wounds of the past again and again, I am very painful, and others are also very unhappy; complaining about society every day, although it can resonate, is meaningless.
Women, at the age of fifty, are also elders, to have more positive energy, often smile, do not complain.
04
Third, talking about circles is not interesting to ask for yourself.
"Three women in one play", it seems that all women like to twitter and chat.
There is a saying that goes well: "If you want to make a thing spread faster, tell others that this is a secret, don't pass it on." ”
Admittedly, those who like to "whisper" are not necessarily good people, they may be saying unseemly things, and hope that this secret, through some channel, will be made public.
In the workplace, some women like to gossip and point fingers at their bosses. Once the words reached the ears of their superiors, the woman's character was compromised.
Sickness comes in from the mouth, and evil comes out of the mouth. Women have to keep their mouths shut. With your life experience, you should understand the truth that "silence is gold". The older you get, the more you have to live like a clear stream—the quieter, the more expensive.
05
Fourth, there is no sincere circle of friends, tired of coping.
As the saying goes: "A thousand precautions, girlfriends are difficult to prevent." ”
The words are a bit ugly and exaggerated. Not all girlfriends are bad people. A good girlfriend can take you on a rampage and can accompany you through the most difficult times.
When a woman encounters something annoying and talks to her girlfriend, the mood is good; when some unspeakable secrets are said, it is easy; when she is cornered, going to her girlfriend's house for a few days is also considered "settled".
However, you must also understand: "It is difficult to have thousands of friends and one confidant." ”
Really good girlfriends, hard to meet. If there is, it won't be much. When a woman makes friends, she will most likely suffer losses.
When women reach the age of fifty, most of them have a certain amount of savings, and they still have a youthful and beautiful appearance. Whether a friend borrows money or goes to a dance hall together, be very cautious.
In addition, in the WeChat circle of friends, do not be too real, you can even fade out of the circle of friends, occasionally look at it, do not interact with strangers.
It is enough to have three or five confidants, and to have extra friends, just ignore it. If you're a grandmother, you'd rather have more grandchildren than be too gregarious.
06
Confucius said: "Living with a good person, such as entering the room of Zhilan, for a long time without smelling its fragrance, that is, dissolving with it; living with an unkind person, like entering the abalone, for a long time without smelling its smell, it is also dissolved with it." ”
People over fifty, choose the right person to communicate, away from the chaotic circle, if it is a similar smell, it is better to go to see the scenery alone. Slowly fade out of the workplace, look down on interests, give up the heart of comparison, no "circle" and no "job" is light.
If you don't have a single friend and it doesn't matter, get used to being alone, like a flower on a wild meadow, self-appreciation.
Women are like flowers, a sea of flowers is a beautiful view, and a single branch is also.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.