Hello everyone, I'm a big brother. Recently, a parent asked me, "What should I do if I reason with my child and he doesn't listen?" "For example, don't buy too many toys, don't eat junk food... Parents reason with their children over and over again, but the children listen to the left ear and the right ear, and even resist the parents' reasoning. ”
Many parents ask what is going on? What should I say before my child listens?
One: The 7/38/55 law
It can be seen that the child can only receive 7% of the parent's language, and the other is felt through the body and tone. If you yell to be reasonable and express angry emotions, then the younger child's feedback is fear, and the older one is resistance and avoidance. Therefore, for the 7% of the information, it will also be fleeting, and parents will have to say it again and again, over and over again.
Two: Children have their own ideas
Many parents do not understand that children actually have their own ideas. Children before the age of six, self-centered, are not in the feelings of others, including their parents.
For example, the parent does not allow him to eat the food he picks up from the ground, which is dirty, but for the child, he just wants to taste it. And if you stop him and don't let him be late, he will find it difficult to understand, and he will not be able to listen to your reasoning.
After the age of 6, children begin to awaken to self-awareness. Your truth is your truth, he has his own ideas, and he does not like to succumb to your reasoning.
High-level education makes good use of methods
After listening to the big brother say this, many parents will ask: "Then as a parent, don't you reason with your children?" ”
Of course not, just have a way to do it. There are many ways to get a child to behave well. Reasoning is the next step. If you often reason with your child and the child doesn't listen, you can try to do these two things:
More love
In the education of younger children, convey the idea that I want you to change because I want you to love me, not because you are wrong.
For example, children throw toys everywhere, reasoning does not work, you can say this: you throw toys everywhere, wait for me to clean up will be very hard, I will be very tired, my arms hurt.
The child is willing to change because he loves you, not because he is wrong.
Praise is encouraged
Children don't like to be blamed and criticized, they want to be praised and recognized, of course, what we call encouragement and praise is not unfounded praise, blind praise (such as "you are so good" and "you are awesome" such suggestions are less used), which will make the child rely too much on praise. We praise children, we have to be skillful.
For example, a lot of children rubbing? But even once, or his attitude at a certain moment, we can use praise to motivate him to move in a good direction.
Low-level parents like to be non-stop reasonable. And high-level parents, will do these 2 things well, your child, it is difficult to think of excellence.
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