I saw such a thing some time ago.
One reader left a message in the background saying she had broken up with her boyfriend.
This is not surprising, after all, meeting and separating is a normal thing in the relationship.
But she went on to talk about the boys' very different performances during their time together. She said:
"Everything was fine in the beginning, he gave me small gifts from time to time and was always available to me. Sometimes I send him a dozen WeChat messages at a time, ask some fanciful questions, and he will reply one by one, not annoying me.
But after a period of time together, his attitude became worse and worse, he lost his temper at every turn, and the ugly words came out of his mouth, I didn't understand why a person's change could be so big, and I couldn't believe the good feelings that others expressed to me. ”
Probably many people have encountered similar problems.
The other party seems to have hidden the true self, and when he gets what he wants, he will reveal his original form and make himself confused.
To put it bluntly, people always have shortcomings, but the number of shortcomings and where the level is determines whether a person is suitable for love, or whether it is suitable for deep friendship.
So today I want to talk to you about whether a boy is worth interacting with, and what should I look at?
See if he can control and stabilize his emotions
In "Knowing or Not", Minglan once said: "To stay with people, in the end, it is still the low place, the lowest place of character." ”
This sentence applies in any relationship, especially feelings.
Two people get along day and night, the most authentic character will be slowly revealed, the more familiar the less to hide.
Therefore, to see whether a man is worthy of contact and interaction, do not look at his when he is satisfied, but to see what kind of performance he will behave when he is frustrated and depressed, and even emotional collapse.
I remembered reading a report before about the way Zhou Runfa and his wife got along.
They sometimes quarrel, but every time they quarrel, no matter what the reason, Zhou Runfa will not be angry with his wife, and every time the quarrel is over, no matter who is right and who is wrong, Zhou Runfa will be the first person to take the initiative to give in and admit his mistake.
Bad emotions everyone will have, but how bad they can be, but it directly shows a person's bottom line and responsibility.
Moreover, only people who really love you very much will be willing to control their emotions for you.
No matter how bad the mood is, no matter what the peak of the emotion collapse, whether there is the strength to hurt you or not, you can always restrain yourself and do your best to avoid it.
Only such a man has the ability to protect you in the wind and rain.
See if he can accept and tolerate your emotions
I've seen a video like this:
When the girl was about to leave work, her aunt suddenly came, and when her boyfriend went to pick her up from work, she sat in the hall on the first floor of the company, with a very bad face.
In fact, she is usually a person who has a smile on everyone's face, but several colleagues greeted her that day, and she only nodded her head and did not speak, because the mood was really bad.
The boy asked her what she wanted to eat, and she didn't speak, asking if she wanted to go home or where to go, and she didn't respond.
The boy then said, "You sit here and wait for me to get down." ”
After a while, he returned with a warm baby and a hot drink.
The hot drink was put into the girl's hand, the warm baby tore it first, waited for it to be hot and then pasted on her stomach, and then touched her head and said: "Or I will carry you on my back, go home and make you ginger to drink." ”
The girl smiled at once, wanting to be taken care of like this, her body was no longer comfortable, and her heart was happy.
In order for the other party to stabilize their emotions and to be able to bear certain negative emotions when the other party is unhappy, it is a two-way street, and the feelings will continue to heat up when the two people work together.
Everyone will have unhappy times, and the meaning of love is precisely that you know that there is a person in this world who is willing to drag you down, no matter what happens, there will be someone who will accompany you without hesitation.
When you are happy, you are happy because someone shares it; when you are sad, because someone comforts you, your sadness is halved.
To love someone, love is not only the positive and optimistic side of ta, but also to accept and tolerate and care for the less bright side of ta.
You coax me, I coax you, and the days will go on smoothly.
See if he puts you first
In the TV series "Thirty Only", before Zhong Xiaoqin decided to divorce Chen Yu, she had a very bad birthday alone.
This birthday directly became the last straw that crushed their marriage.
It happened to be heavy rain that day, and Zhong Xiaoqin called Chen Yu and asked him to pick him up from work. The phone was called many times, but no one answered.
Zhong Xiaoqin walked down the street drenched in rain, and she thought as she walked:
"This is not the first time. The phone does not answer, WeChat does not return. It is said that the nature of the work is special, but when I was busier before, even if I missed the message, I would reply as soon as possible. ”
"In the end, from what day on, there is no nonsense on the phone, there is no meme in WeChat, all communications take three rounds, and it must end within five words."
He didn't care about her mood, his feelings, he didn't care about her affairs, even the two men's clothes were on the balcony, and he only washed his own.
In that state, separation is the best choice for each other.
In fact, it is not difficult to judge whether two people are suitable together.
If two people's lives are not as happy as one person's, if being with each other brings more tears, trouble, and even emotional breakdowns than laughter, it must be inappropriate.
Finding someone together is not just about finding someone, it also means choosing a way of life.
The only person who has met many people in this life, but who will really be closely and deeply involved in your life in the second half of your life, may only be a partner.
Therefore, it is very important to find someone who cares about you, puts you first, responds to everything you do, and has a place to go.
What you say, he will take to heart; what has been promised to you, he will do.
Willing to listen and understand, willing to become a more compatible with each other for each other, so that they are not tired of getting along.
I used to think that liking a person is liking, a glance of ten thousand years is enough, what do you want to do so much?
Later, I found out that the heart is better than looks, and understanding is more important than love.
To see whether a person is worth interacting with, more important than the five senses are the three views, and more important than the material is the character.