Late at night, a person feels lonely and empty, can't help but place a lot of takeaway orders, accompanied by funny TV programs, eating barbecue fried chicken, spending boring nights;
After a day of tedious and meaningless bullshit work, rushed to the snack street, swept the entire street, touched the bulging belly, burped, and returned home satisfied;
After arguing with a good friend, having a conflict with his partner, being sprayed with blood by his boss, ordering milk tea cake, and letting sweets calm his angry and aggrieved heart...
In daily life, it is not difficult to find that emotions can easily affect our appetite.
When we feel anxious, depressed, angry, and lonely, we can often feel much better when we choose to eat a delicious meal and "turn grief and anger into food".
Psychological research has also found that there are some special associations between eating and emotions, especially in negative emotional experiences.
This "eating behavior as a response to negative emotions" is called "emotional eating".
It's certainly okay to choose to soothe yourself with good food and reward yourself with "eating something delicious" when you're down.
But when you only use "eat something delicious" as a panacea for saving emotions, then this may cause more serious damage to our body and mind.
Friend Xiaoshi is a person who often treats himself with good food. On our day off last week, we met at a café.
As soon as she sat down, she quickly ordered a pile of cake, plus a cup of sweet cappuccino. She said she couldn't bear it if she didn't eat some sweets.
When the cake was delivered, she began to eat it while spitting out to me her immoral boss and wooden boyfriend.
"I was really. The boss who lacked morality would call me to work, obviously seeing that I was already busy flying, and casually asked me to print the document and grab some unnecessary small details, really!
It's always ineffective to hold meetings, almost after work to say that you want to have a meeting, the meeting does not say anything necessary, just Rory, said the same as not said, net will waste everyone's time! You said this boss, I can't have a barbecue fried chicken, milk tea cake can calm my urge to rush up and hit people. ”
After Xiao Shi finished complaining, the cake on the table was almost eaten. The large intake of sweets calmed Xiao Shi's irritated state at the beginning a lot.
"Alas, there is really no sadness that cannot be solved by a good meal. The last time my wooden boyfriend comforted me for most of the day, it was not much more effective than when I ate two small cakes and delicious milk tea.
But sometimes, after eating and drinking, my fragile stomach can't stand it, and I always have stomach medicine, which is also uncomfortable! Xiaoshi said with a wry smile. You are taking advantage of eating to eliminate worry, and you are even more worried. I replied.
Food can indeed play a calming role. Does that mean we can eat a lot to calm our emotions without scruples? Obviously, this really can't be.
We all know that improper dietary preferences and irregular eating habits will bring great burden to our body and are also prone to diseases, such as diabetes, hyperlipidemia, hypertension, fatty liver and other chronic diseases are related to this.
This will threaten our physical health and bring us a low quality of life experience, just like Xiaoshi often goes to the hospital in the middle of the night to hang up the emergency department because of gastrointestinal problems, and usually has a variety of stomach medicines.
And in addition to the negative physical consequences, there are also negative psychological consequences.
01) Bring more feelings of loss of control and negative emotional experiences
Studies have found that a sense of loss of control is the most commonly reported experience by people with eating disorders. Individuals have difficulty controlling their food intake or food intake, which can make them feel like they are a runaway train, allowing emotions to dominate their brains.
After eating, I noticed that my eating behavior exceeded the level I could control, followed by negative emotional experiences such as guilt, shame, and fear.
After losing control, we feel bad about ourselves, our self-esteem and self-evaluation are reduced, and we feel anxious and depressed about our out-of-control behavior.
And when we rely on food and eating to fight and calm emotions, after stuffing a large amount of food into our mouths, we don't know what we are eating, whether it is good or not, just mechanically repeat the action of chewing and swallowing, until we feel that the emptiness in our hearts is filled and our stomach is no longer empty.
But when looking at his increasingly fruitful body and the soaring numbers on the scale, the heart that had just felt satisfied was once again invaded by emptiness and guilt and shame, both anxious about his body and health, and powerless and frustrated that he was uncontrollable again. Therefore, by eating and eliminating worry, you will only make yourself more worried.
02) Caught in an unhealthy vicious circle and isolated from the opportunity to truly solve problems
Researchers on emotional eating, based on research, point out that regular emotional eaters often fall into such a vicious circle:
When you feel that your mood is not very good (anxiety, irritability, loneliness and other negative emotions), you will naturally choose to consume a large amount of food to get temporary relief, but then soon feel your loss of control eating, as well as regret of your behavior, experience negative emotions again, so feel the urge to eat, and eat and drink wildly again.
After falling into this cycle, eating is both a means for us to obtain temporary relaxation and a source of evil that makes us feel more guilty, collapsed and eliminated.
While feeling powerless, we also rely on it, and the real emotional problems that need to be solved are hidden behind the crazy eating behavior.
So, can mechanically repetitive "emotional eating" be solved?
In "Say Goodbye to DBT Methods for Emotional Eating", some actionable methods are provided.
Method 1: Rational review and renew commitment
I believe that many people who fall into emotional eating have tried many ways to stop themselves, each time telling themselves "I can't eat anymore", but each time it seems that they can't hold on and get involved again.
This is because we are used to countering emotions with food, and while we feel guilty about what we eat, we do enjoy the temporary satisfaction that comes with eating.
So when we stop eating all of a sudden, we can't even get short-term satisfaction, and those negative emotions rush to us and beat us up.
Therefore, we have to admit that emotional eating can bring us certain benefits, but we must also clearly recognize that there are long-term negative consequences behind such behavior.
Emotional eating requires us to look at it rationally.
The book describes such a way to look at it:
"Prepare a small card to write down the benefits and disadvantages of emotional eating, and compare them, and we will find that the disadvantages far outweigh the benefits.
And we can carry this small card with us to remind ourselves, and when we feel the urge to eat, we can take it out to look at it, think about it, and then decide whether to eat it or not.
You can also write your commitment on a small card, which can be very popular language, but it can lead to the depths of your heart. ”
Method 2: Mindful eating
Nowadays, when most young people eat, they will find a favorite drama or variety show and eat while watching.
Although "electronic pressed vegetables" are very cooking, we also have to admit that when we eat in this way, our attention is not on the food, how the food tastes, and how much we eat, often unconscious.
The same goes for emotional eating. Under the invasion of negative emotions, under the strong urge to eat, eating is a mechanical repetitive behavior, we cannot connect with the current food, just eat unconsciously.
In response to such situations, mindful eating is proposed. Focus on the food we are eating in the moment, rebuild our inner relationship with food, listen to the voice of our body, and consciously feel what we are eating, how much we are eating, and what we feel.
Mindful eating, when eating, requires us to observe, take a non-judgmental stance, and focus on what we are doing in the moment.
Observe first. Before eating, carefully observe and describe what the food looks like. The hot noodles have a mouth-watering smell, the soup base is rich, the golden omelette spread on it is just ripe, and as soon as it is poked, the yolk flows out... Carefully observe the food in front of you, experience the stimulation of food with your senses, and pay attention to the thoughts that appear in your mind.
Then chew slowly when eating, and experience the original taste of the food between the lips and teeth, as well as the feeling of the body.
Finally, always pay attention to the signals sent by the body, whether you still need to continue eating, or you already feel full.
In practicing mindful eating, we eat every bite with full awareness, awareness, and attention to every moment, every taste, every chew.
Method three: Look for other ways to control emotions
When we have strong mood swings, in addition to emotional changes, physiology will also produce a series of changes: breathing faster, heart rate faster, the body will sweat or clammy cold, and even accompanied by dizziness and stomach pain and other intestinal reactions.
When eating, our body will make a series of adjustments, allowing us to temporarily stay away from the psychological experience of negative emotions. The psychological pain is transferred to the body, which in turn turns to food for relief.
So, we can look for other ways to adjust and replace eating. For example, learning abdominal breathing also adjusts the body's response while focusing on breathing.
Abdominal breathing: Expand your area with slow, rhythmic, flowing breathing instead of shallow breathing in your upper chest or throat.
Imagine a balloon in your belly that slowly fills with air, then slowly contracts, then slowly expands, and so on. The frequency of breathing is about 10-12 breaths per minute. Inhale and exhale through your nose. As you inhale, slowly count one, two, three. As you exhale, be sure to relax and calm down.
After doing it 10 times, focus on your slow breathing. The more you practice, the easier it is to shift your attention to your breathing.
In short, occasionally using gourmet healing is not a big deal, but if you only rely on "eating" to solve emotional problems, you should be wary. If the situation is serious and uncontrollable, seek professional assessment and help in time.
Food brings us a wonderful experience, we should learn to enjoy and experience the deliciousness of food, and be a tasteful dry rice person!
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