Recently, I was chasing a TV series "Heart House". This drama is about the daily trivialities of a family, full of thick fireworks. I believe that every audience can see their own shadow from it, and people can't help but lament the difficulty of life.
The life of middle-aged people seems to be glamorous, but behind it is a place of chicken feathers, full of the noise and fighting of chickens flying and dogs jumping.
In the play, the elegant and intellectual white-collar Gu Qingyu and the shrewd and capable housewife Feng Xiaoqin are a pair of wrongdoers from the beginning, and almost every time they meet, they will cause fierce disputes.
Especially when Feng Xiaoqin's husband Gu Lei died, Gu Lei's family regarded her as a thorn in her eye, believing that Feng Xiaoqin had forced Gu Lei to die.
However, Feng Xiaoqin insisted that it was not someone else who really killed Gu Lei, but Gu Lei's sister Gu Qingyu.
She believes that Gu Qingyu deliberately provoked the feelings between the husband and wife, while Gu Qingyu believes that Feng Xiaoqin has pushed her brother too tightly and always treats Gu Lei as a son.
In fact, no one is right or wrong in this matter, everyone just thinks about the problem from their own standpoint, and never thinks about the problem from the perspective of the other party.
In addition to telling the story of family affection, this drama also tells the love of middle-aged people.
Gu Qingyu and Shi Yuan were considered to be green plum bamboo horses, but later the two of them were separated. Years later, they reunite again, and flash marriage and divorce.
What really touched me was Feng Xiaoqin's crush on Zhan Xiang. The love of middle-aged people is both romantic and sad, both warm and restrained, both simple and moving.
Generally speaking, the love of middle-aged people usually has these characteristics.
1, both romantic and realistic
Gu Qingyu and Shi Yuan's love looks very romantic, and their impression of each other is still stuck in their childhood, so green and charming.
It's just that the years have changed everything. Although they met again, fell in love, and flashed marriage, after marriage they fell into suspicion and quarrel with each other.
Gu Qingyu is more excellent than Shi Yuan, she has a successful career and a lot of income. Whether it is in terms of academic qualifications or income, Shi Yuan is inferior everywhere, and he is not Qing Yu's opponent at all.
Marriage is about the right door, they seem to be people of two worlds, there is no way to achieve equal strength.
Obviously, Gu Qingyu is better than Shi Yuan in every way, she occupies the initiative in her married life, although she often comforts Shi Yuan, asks him not to think too much, relax his heart, she will not look down on him. But it was precisely her charity tone and attitude that made Shi Yuan more uneasy and anxious, and Shi Yuan's self-esteem was greatly insulted and hurt.
The self-esteem of middle-aged men is really fatal, and they want to die to face the guilt. When Gu Qingyu learned that Shi Yuan's mother was ill and was anxious to pay a high medical fee, she secretly paid the cost.
The reason why she did not dare to tell Shi Yuan about this matter was because she was afraid that his self-esteem was too strong, that he was too sensitive, and that more was better than less.
As a result, this matter was finally known to Shi Yuan. Sure enough, they had a big fight over it.
The feelings of middle-aged people are like this, they look very beautiful, but they are actually full of all kinds of contradictions and conflicts.
In fact, Gu Qingyu did not do anything wrong, and Shi Yuan did not have to be so sensitive. It is precisely because they love each other and do not want each other to be wronged in their feelings, so they are easy to hide from their partners, resulting in deeper and deeper misunderstandings between each other.
The marriage model of strong women and weak men is often difficult to maintain for a long time. Because the middle-aged man loves face too much and has too strong self-esteem, once a woman is better than himself, he can't stand it, all kinds of work, all kinds of tossing, deliberately making trouble, so that women are at a loss in their feelings.
2, both sincere and forbearing
Feng Xiaoqin has a crush on Zhan Xiang, Zhan Xiang likes Gu Qingyu, Gu Qingyu can never let go of Shi Yuan, Shi Yuan also loves Gu Qingyu, but he loves himself more. Otherwise, he would not easily choose to divorce Gu Qingyu.
Among them, what makes me feel most sad is Feng Xiaoqin's wishful love and dedication to Zhan Xiang.
She obviously knew that Zhan Xiang's favorite person was Gu Qingyu, but she was willing to act as a spare tire, just as Zhan Xiang was willing to act as Gu Qingyu's spare tire.
Feng Xiaoqin asked Zhan Xiang if he had proposed to Gu Qingyu, and Zhan Xiang said that he had not been able to find the right opportunity. Therefore, Feng Xiaoqin used the excuse of teaching him how to propose marriage and expressed her true admiration to him.
Feng Xiaoqin affectionately confessed to Zhan Xiang: "I think you are the kindest and most reliable and responsible person I have ever seen, you have many shortcomings that you don't know, you are stupid to death, you are bullied and help people come up with ideas, a tendon." I sometimes pity you, and I feel sorry for you.
I will be as happy as you are to see that you have someone you like, but you don't have to be stressed, I just want to tell you, I think you are the most worthy person I have ever seen in my life, is to let you know that I like you, there is no other meaning, if you are happy, I will be very happy. ”
When she finished saying these words, Zhan Xiang was already moved to tears and tears.
In order to alleviate the awkward atmosphere, not to embarrass him, not to put pressure and burden on him, Feng Xiaoqin also deliberately smiled and asked him back: "How' it goes, is it not bad?" ”
Liking a person, but only confessing by teaching him to propose to others is already very sad in itself.
The love of middle-aged people is that I like you, but it has nothing to do with you, and you must not have any psychological baggage and burdens.
The love of middle-aged people is both sincere and stoic, both warm and frank and thick and deep, pretending not to care on the surface, but in fact, the heart has long been turned upside down.
3, both active and humble
Zhan Xiang's love for Gu Qingyu is a unilateral payment, and he is willing to give everything for her, even if Gu Qingyu has never really loved him.
The love of middle-aged people, both active and humble, knows that two people cannot come together, but is still deeply involved in it, painful and happy.
Love is unreasonable, sometimes the person you love does not necessarily love you, and the person who loves you does not necessarily look up to each other.
Middle-aged people are willing to take the initiative to pay for their loved ones, even if all the efforts cannot be exchanged for a true heart, they are still at all costs.
When Gu Qingyu divorced Shi Yuan, she finally agreed to confirm a relationship with Zhan Xiang and took him to the door to meet a family.
However, Gu Qingyu did not truly accept him from the depths of his heart.
Even if Zhan Xiang often praised Feng Xiaoqin in front of her, she would not be jealous.
The reason why she agreed to associate with Zhan Xiang was because she was completely dead set on love. It is precisely because she no longer has expectations and hopes for love, so she feels that it does not matter who she chooses to associate with. Even if she is not with Zhan Xiang, she may choose to associate with other men.
However, she thinks it is more cost-effective to be with Zhan Xiang, after all, in addition to Zhan Xiang, she will not find a man who can fully tolerate and accept her for a while and a half.
Zhan Xiang is not a fool, he knows this very well, but he loves Gu Qingyu too much, even if he is soberly aware that she does not really love himself, he is still willing to be her stepping stone, and he is willing to go to the soup for her.
In short, there is no right or wrong relationship, only whether it is appropriate or not.
The love of middle-aged people is full of calculation and generosity, both romantic and realistic, both sincere and stoic, both warm and subtle, both active and humble.
I hope that Feng Xiaoqin will eventually be able to settle down in Shanghai, and even if she is not with Zhan Xiang in the end, she can still live a satisfactory life.
I also always firmly believe that the kind and tenacious Feng Xiaoqin deserves a better life.
Although the love of middle-aged people is not perfect, full of chicken feathers, as long as a person has a kind heart, is full of enthusiasm for life, and grows forever to the sun, he will certainly be able to find his own happiness and find a place for his soul to live.