Good friendship begins with good feelings, respect for talents, and loyalty to character
In the trough, in addition to self-crossing, others can not help!
Don't I feel bad about forcing my child like this? However, the future of the child is more important than the heartache. Because children who have been "forced" and "not forced" since childhood have lived a completely different life after 20 years. If I indulge my son because of a moment of softness, then he will lose more than one good word in the future.
The "forced" child will not be too bad in the future. Some time ago, Yang Qian, the post-00 "Tsinghua Xueba" who shot down the first gold of the Olympic Games, was frequently searched. "Tsinghua Xueba", "Olympic Champion", any title is enough to make countless people admire. Now that Yang Qian has combined the two in one, she can almost seal the gods in situ. But the audience only saw the mighty light after her success, but they could not see the countless times behind her gritted teeth and insisted.
"You can't go wrong at any time when you read." Children who have been forced by their parents to practice calligraphy and play the piano since childhood may have a busier and harder childhood, but after 20 years, they will have more opportunities than others. And these opportunities are derived from the perseverance exercised in the process of persistence.
Children who are "not forced" have paid for the "no effort" of the past all their lives. If you ask: Will those "untouched" children grow up to thank their parents for their kindness? Most people shake their heads and sigh. In the "Tsinghua Xueba Teaching Zi Jing", it is said: "Parents should understand that when their children are young, they lack self-control, and it is normal not to take the initiative to learn and other difficult things, and the initiative is not the norm." When the child "does not take the initiative", if the parents are soft for a while and agree to the child to give up, then the exchange is not necessarily the child's gratitude, but may be complaining.
Because the children who have been "not forced" since childhood have obtained a relaxed and happy childhood, what awaits them for the rest of their lives will be a life of inaction, and the regrets when they dream back in the middle of the night. They will blame themselves countless times for why they gave up so easily, and if they were forced to stick to it, would their lives be different now?
Parents are the ferrymen of their children, so don't be soft when you should be cruel. The Internet said: "Don't expect children to be self-conscious on the road to education. "Deeply impressed. Teacher Li Meijin once said: "The growth of children is staged, 12 years old is the key period for the development of children's personality, whether children can become talents, the key depends on whether there is 'discipline' in place at various stages before the age of 12." And the so-called "discipline" must contain the element of "persecution." The child is still young, the values have not been formed, and the self-control is not stable.
If parents uphold the concept of "happy education", raise their children and obey their children's wishes, then the future of such children is doomed to be mediocre. Only by appropriately "persecuting", allowing children to do the right things at the right age, and not giving up easily when they should persist, can such children truly grasp their own lives and live an ideal life when they reach adulthood.
Many times, children do not want to insist because they only see the bitterness in front of them and forget the sweetness of the future. Parents imagining the future with their children will help their children find the motivation to continue to persevere. There is a saying that parents' understanding is a good medicine to cure their children. When the child wants to give up, the parents should not use strong means to force the child, but should ask the reason, and then understand them from the child's point of view. When they feel that their needs are respected and understood, the child will continue to follow the advice of his parents and stick to what he should do.
The attentive companionship of parents is the motivation for children to persevere; if you ask "what is the best gift for children", I will answer without hesitation: "companionship". Especially when "forcing" children to read or practice their skills, the careful companionship of parents will become the motivation for children to persevere. Many parents are used to looking at their mobile phones from time to time when accompanying their children, and some even look at mobile phones the whole time. Such companionship will not only interfere with the child's attention, but may also cause the child to have feelings that you do not pay attention to him.
When accompanying children, you should put down the mobile phone as much as possible, devote yourself wholeheartedly, and carefully watch every word written by the child, every picture drawn, and every song played, so that the child will feel your concern and care, and he will be more willing to stick to it. Do a good job of emotional management, do not reprimand.
In the process of learning, children will inevitably have times when they are not doing well enough. But if at this time, parents are emotionally out of control and loudly rebuke the child because of the child's mistakes, then the child may also be disgusted with learning itself while being frightened. So no matter what happens, parents should do a good job of emotional management and communicate with their children in a gentle way, rather than rude rebuke. Give your child timely feedback.
The company of parents is not only to prevent children from feeling lonely, but more importantly, to give feedback to children during their practice. "Deliberate Practice" mentions: "Whatever you are trying to do, you need feedback to accurately discern where you are still deficient and how they exist." "In addition to the children themselves, parents are also important candidates for feedback. Where does this playing sound less fluent? Which word in this ancient poem is wrong? Which part of this brush character is not so similar? As long as parents are careful, they can give some feedback. And this feedback will allow children to find problems and continue to improve.
The famous American writer Anna Kundran once said: "Some roads are very long, and it will be very tiring to go down, but if you don't go, you will regret it." "Compared with a momentary tiredness, the regret for the rest of my life is more difficult to bear." Therefore, when the children are young, parents should "force" the children to do not let them choose comfort prematurely at the hard age, otherwise what awaits them will be deep remorse. Only children who are "forced" to grow up from an early age will exercise perseverance stronger than ordinary people and the courage to overcome difficulties. Such a child will have more choices after adulthood and can live the life they yearn for. Education is very beautiful, the road is very difficult, today's parents must have a stronger heart, for their children to adhere to the correct education.
All major disasters are a mirror
Respect others and tolerate the fault of others
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