Wen/Lan Mama on parenting
We often say that victory is "who wins the medal", in fact, victory lies in the harvest and understanding experienced along the way, and who has not fallen on the road to success? Although the end point and the result are important, success belongs to the powerful person, and this "strength" refers to knowledge, ability and culture, where the source of strength lies in setting limits on one's own life, and the first step to success is to "dare to be different from others".
Among them, with the increase of today's life, economy and educational pressure, many parents pay more attention to winning and losing on the starting line in order to make their children's future better lives, and some parents set high goals for their children even if they are in second place, and this kind of children who have been competing with wins and losses in the running process, even if they win at the starting line, it is easy to lose at the end.
Case:
Listen to friends said that there is a girl named Momo next to her is a "genius" and "prodigy" in the eyes of the parents of her classmates, and she often gets a full score in the exam and coincidentally jumps into the first grade, so she has become the "youngest" student in the class, and probably because of this layer of reasons, Momo is often specially cared for by teachers and classmates, and sometimes she is easily forgiven for being naughty and troublesome, and even comforted by teachers and classmates.
Probably because of this "special environment, special treatment", Momo usually in the class in addition to lively and cute, unconsciously more arrogant, such as casual use of classmates stationery and do not say hello, some students come to ask questions when impatiently spit "this problem will not, really convince you"...
Over time, Momo in the class began to be gradually rejected by classmates, many of the class is a lonely person, probably usually paid attention to for a long time, envious more, Foam for a time can not accept the psychological difference that was snubbed by everyone, so this "ignorant" girl began to deliberately run into trouble, sometimes deliberately hid the books that classmates want to go to class, sometimes deliberately kicked the ball to the door of other classes, but the number of times more Foam's selling cuteness does not work, many students have long seen Momo choose to take a detour.
And this sense of gap, but also in a test score of Momo completely defeated her, this time Momo has been maintaining 95+ scores slipped down to less than 60, 70 results, which has always stood in the top of the team of foam, how much in the heart of the arrogance of the heart has been not lightly hurt.
During that time, it is said that Momo was once bored with school, and even unwilling to communicate with others, fortunately, the homeroom teacher has not given up, many home visits and parents do not say, but also patiently persuade Momo's wounded heart, and finally in the joint efforts of teachers and parents, Momo began to get better, although after experiencing a setback, and after the course, Momo's grades can not return to the previous level, but this time Momo is more strong, hard and mature, even if he is not admitted to the ideal junior high school in the end, But believe that as long as there is a focused mind, then the final result is an unknown.
On the importance of children's ability to focus? Concentration determines the child's learning ability, bear perseverance, stimulate the child's hidden curiosity, want to let the child grow more colorful, the cultivation of concentration is very important, like children with good concentration, they will work harder when doing things, and when they encounter difficulties, they often do not give up under the stimulation of curiosity.
Concentration can enhance children's confidence, but also improve their executive and learning ability, and concentration can also be said to be the basis of all cognitive ability improvement, so want children to win at the starting line, full score is not enough to be proud, can do a good job of concentration in any situation, they will be better than children of the same age in learning, life, including growth.
How to improve your child's ability to focus? It is recommended that parents gradually improve their children's abilities in the following four aspects:
1. Establishment of goals
Often hear many parents complain that their children do things without rules, more without enthusiasm, such as today's things always say "I do tomorrow", tomorrow's things always say "not in a hurry", in fact, this kind of child is a typical weak sense of purpose, they don't even know what they should do every day, looking at sitting in the classroom to learn In fact, the idea has long been unknown where to fly, in the words of the teacher, "the baby learning has no goal", the important thing is that the child with a weak sense of goal, When you usually do things, it is easy to change due to external temptations.
If the child is not in a hurry to do anything, then parents should not rush to criticize and reprimand the child, help the child to establish a good goal will is to do a positive root improvement, and to help the child establish a good goal will is not recommended to be in place, usually try to start from the interest, and small goals, when the child wants to make a goal of interest in a certain aspect, it is necessary to decompose the plan, and then organize it into a schedule, or a book.
Finally, the goal plan should not be too much can be divided into short-term, or long-term form, this kind of management planning through small goals can well reflect the sense of goal, the child usually has more regulations and enthusiasm when completing the plan, and finally when the child achieves the goal, the parents should also be the guide of the child's soul, in their face of difficulties when they encounter difficulties and want to give up in time to give encouragement to the heart, when the child has an optimistic attitude, the difficulties can also be difficult to move forward, and finally step by step to the end.
2. Vestibular awakening
Children who win at the starting line have never been full scores, pay attention to those children who are better in learning and life, and will find that they generally have a dazzling aura of concentration, but in fact, children are naturally active and easily tempted by external factors, in fact, those children who are more energetic and always act half-hearted, not intentionally, but lack vestibular awakening.
The so-called vestibular awakening, generally refers to the child's sense of balance, this internal feeling can allow children to distinguish their own state through balance, like children who lack vestibular awareness generally ignore the internal feelings, so that what they do is relatively unfamiliar, so it is difficult to find shortcomings, if the child is usually indifferent to their own behavior, and shortcomings, it is recommended that parents usually pay attention to the child's vestibular awakening.
For example, for some children who are more energetic and active, we can use the dynamic brake to take the child to do 10-20 minutes of vestibular awareness game awakening every day, such as elephant nose rotation, frog jumping and paste wallpaper can effectively enhance the child's vestibular awareness activation, this kind of active, love to explore the interest to play the child's internal sensory experience, can effectively train the child's perception of the process and memory, take the child to do 10-20 minutes of vestibular awareness activation game every day, you will find the child to do things actively, There has been a noticeable improvement in concentration, including concentration.
3. Auditory instructions
Auditory instructions are an important part of concentration training, like the child's positive can feel the internal feeling of awakening through the vestibule, but the child's positive behavior needs auditory concentration, judgment and memory to output, especially the auditory attention embodiment is more directly affect the child's action efficiency, like the class auditory concentration ability of children are more likely to be distracted, looking around, and often affect the child's auditory discrimination, and memory ability is poor, and auditory instructions will also directly affect the child's learning situation.
So, in the face of children who are not serious about listening to lectures in class, love to wander, and do not communicate actively, how should parents improve their children's auditory instruction training? If you want to adjust or improve your child's sense of auditory instruction, it is recommended that parents often take their children to do some word games at home.
For example, give the child a set of words (willow buds, snowman, panda, cold, baby elephant, peach blossom, tea, heating), and then let the child make corresponding instructions through words, such as this group of words have spring to raise the left hand, there are animals to raise the right hand, there are winter hands up, this action from hearing to making instructions is to enhance the child's sense of auditory instructions, and children can also better focus and exert strength in these games.
4. Intuitive sense
Many children are particularly procrastinating when writing homework, the speed of writing homework and reading books is also relatively slow, especially when writing homework, it is more likely to make mistakes and often appears to be close to the word, in fact, these children usually belong to the visual disorder, usually parents should pay attention to the child's visual ability exercise when paying attention to the child's learning, such as playing some square games with visual intuition training with children.
How to quickly and effectively improve your child's visual sense? We need to prepare a hard material square white paper, and then draw 25 5 * 5 small squares on the paper, and write 25 randomly scrambled numbers on the small square, and finally the parents say the number to let the child quickly find out the number, in the cycle and multiple rounds of training you will find that the child's auditory instructions, including visual intuition have been effectively improved, especially in terms of concentration, children are more active and methodical.
In fact, education has never been a so-called shortcut, including the starting line of parents' hearts and minds, and behind each achievement is actually a countless setback experience, parents must be a good example when educating their children, try to put the end of education on the starting point to consider, such as our end point of education is to hope that children grow up healthily, then in the process of cultivating children, we must try to pay attention to the healthy psychological development of children, hope that children's academic achievements should try to pay attention to children's ability to cultivate...
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I am Lan Ma, focusing on the analysis of the parenting field author, with personal examples, a variety of family education examples, to record the moment of parenting feelings, like friends, welcome to pay attention to @ Lan Mama talk about parenting together to learn and grow together!