Fatty slices, picture from the Internet
"Having children" and "passing on the generations" are the traditional concepts of every Chinese, but how to raise children better is a problem worth thinking about after having children.
An old man in Ziyang City, Sichuan Province, who finally married his 26-year-old wife at the age of 50, naturally loves his daughter-in-law like a treasure, and is extremely looking forward to the arrival of his children.
However, the four sons who came with him were all fed to death, and in the face of the last daughter, he chose to feed her fat every day, and finally was raised to be extremely unhealthy.
So, why did the old man "feed his own son" who he regarded as a treasure, and why did he feed his daughter to eat fatty meat slices?
It is difficult for a poor family to marry a daughter-in-law and an old man for fifty years before getting married
Hu Laohan, whose real name is Hu Zhifei, was born into an ordinary peasant family in Xindian Village, Nanjin Town, Yanjiang District, Ziyang City, Sichuan Province.
Here, there are more men and fewer women, and for various reasons, it is very common for boys to be unable to marry their daughters-in-law, and Hu Zhifei is no exception.
From the time he was in his twenties, Hu Zhifei's mother began to worry about Hu Zhifei's daughter-in-law, but she also said several families before and after, and finally all of them died without illness.
Hu Zhifei is not very good at taking care of housework, let alone the type of sweet mouth that will coax people, and relying on himself to find a daughter-in-law to start a family is a distant thing.
Xindian Village, the picture comes from the Internet
His father died early, and his mother could only be anxious when she looked at Hu Zhifei's unconcerned appearance.
After such a delay, he reached Hu Zhifei's forties.
Hu Zhifei's mother was old and in poor health, and she also died in anticipation of Hu Zhifei marrying and having children, and until she died, she could not see the appearance of her grandson.
At the age of fifty, Hu Zhifei's marriage to his daughter-in-law finally ushered in a turning point.
Marry a daughter-in-law, the picture comes from the Internet
A well-known matchmaker told Hu Zhifei that he knew a very young girl who looked good and asked Hu Zhifei if he wanted to marry his daughter-in-law.
Hu Zhifei was ecstatic, of course he wanted to marry and have children to continue the incense, how could he not want to have this opportunity now?
But Hu Zhifei then calmed down, but when he thought about it, he felt that it was not right - how could a young and beautiful girl marry such an old and poor old man as him?
It turned out that this 26-year-old girl was not only congenitally blind, but also had intellectual disabilities.
Old and poor old man, the picture comes from the Internet
Hu Zhifei hesitated: marrying a disabled person who could not see and could not take care of himself was a challenge for him, who was not strong in his ability to take care of himself.
But thinking about his situation and feeling that he had reached the age of starting a family, he finally agreed to the matchmaker's introduction.
Therefore, there was not even any wedding dowry expenses, a red quilt, Hu Zhifei married his young wife who was 24 years younger than himself back home.
A bed of red quilts, the picture comes from the Internet
That year was 2006.
The life of just marrying a wife is happy for Hu Zhifei.
Whenever he came home, there was someone waiting for him.
Although the man would not make him a good meal, but since the death of his parents, the home has been cold, because the arrival of the little wife has a lot of fireworks, and he and the little wife get along with each other relatively happily.
The image comes from the Internet
The wife is mentally handicapped and unable to take care of the old man to take care of the children
In the second year of marriage, his wife gave birth to a white and fat eldest son, and Hu Zhifei was very happy: if his parents knew about Izumi, they would surely rest in peace.
However, the bad news soon came from this home that had not been happy for a few days.
Due to the blindness of the wife and the inability of the eyes, coupled with the congenital mental retardation, there was no way to take care of the newborn son.
But how can a cropper who watches the sky eat, disregard the crops in the field, stay at home every day to watch the children?
Hu Zhifei was busy with his work in the field every morning and returned home late—the birth of his son filled his heart with the desire and motivation to struggle.
However, the fragile baby could not help but live without anyone to take care of, and in the midst of crying and waiting to be fed, Hu Zhifei's first son soon weakened.
Before he turned one year old, Hu Zhifei's first son died prematurely.
Hu Zhifei was full of grief in his heart, but he could not resent his wife who was congenitally mentally incomplete, and could only resent himself for not taking good care of his children.
Baby, the picture comes from the Internet
With the experience of his first son, Hu Zhifei vowed to take good care of the children behind him.
Although the wife could not take care of herself in life, she was young and in good health, and recovered quickly after giving birth to her first son.
Shortly after the death of their first son, their second son also came.
Treating the second son, Hu Zhifei's heart is of course also loved. If he could, his only hope for his son was to grow up healthy and healthy.
However, the problems faced by the family of three are still real: the wife cannot take care of herself and the children, and if Hu Zhifei stays at home to take care of them, the three of them will not even be able to eat.
There was no way, Hu Zhifei sighed, or could only pick up the hoe and go out to do farm work.
After a day of farm work, Hu Zhifei hurriedly returned to clean up the filth of his wife's urine, and at the same time cooked for the child to feed the child.
But for what to eat, Hu Zhifei can only do what he eats for his children.
But soon, due to a lack of breast milk feeding and basic nutrition, the second son also died before he was one year old.
This made Hu Zhifei's mood feel like falling into the ice cellar again.
Grief-stricken old people, pictures from the Internet
Subsequently, a third and fourth son was born.
In this way of feeding, they all have the same fate as the previous two boys- they died when they were less than one year old.
The successive deaths of his sons have made Hu Zhifei sad, but the blows of life are far from over here.
In 2016, after giving birth to her fifth child, the youngest daughter, Hu Yang'en, Hu Zhifei's wife died of illness.
The death of his wife was devastated by the fact that it was difficult to feed the female fat
When his wife died, Xiao Yang en was only six months old, and the six-month-old baby was the time to feed and need the support of his parents.
However, Hu Zhifei was 62 years old at this time, and his grandfather was more than enough to be a child, and his parenting concept was completely different from that of his young parents.
He still works early and returns late, so that his daughter can maintain the same routine and diet as himself.
At nine o'clock in the morning, Hu Zhifei would cook porridge, and when he had no money to buy milk powder, he would let his daughter eat porridge like himself.
Porridge, the picture comes from the Internet
When it was time for lunch, he would put the fat into his daughter's bowl, which was several months old.
In Hu Zhifei's view, fat meat is a good thing, not only delicious to eat, even the meat is relatively easy to chew, and it does not need any teeth to eat it.
Seeing that Hu Zhifei clipped a good piece of fat meat to his daughter, a kind villager advised him that the child was so small, how could he give the child fat meat?
Moreover, such a large piece of meat, the child can not chew at all, may choke, persuade Hu Zhifei to cut some meat slices and mix into porridge.
Hu Zhifei was indifferent to this, saying, "If she is hungry, she will swallow it in one bite, and it will be fine." ”
In Hu Zhifei's eyes, whose children didn't grow up without pulling and pulling? Children should not be too delicate to raise.
After lunch at noon, there was a short lunch break.
When Hu Zhifei got up and went out, his daughter was still asleep, and he said: "Let her sleep by herself for a while, and I will wake up when I come back at night." ”
But in fact, where is the fixed time for the child to fall asleep and wake up?
As soon as he wakes up, the child will be looking for his parents and will be more likely to crawl around in a bed without any protective measures.
In such cases, there is a possibility of danger at any time.
In the face of reporters' questioning, Hu Zhifei was also helpless.
If he does not go out to work, the family's food and clothing will have no source, and his daughter will be starved to death.
When they returned from the field in the afternoon, the villagers saw that Hu Zhifei's rice bowl for his daughter was porridge mixed with fatty meat slices.
A huge piece of fat meat, even adults eat it may choke up.
The child was visibly hungry, and as Hu Zhifei said, swallowing the slices of meat into his mouth made people feel painful when they looked at it.
Some villagers asked him, don't you worry about the last daughter dying like the brothers in front of him?
Hu Zhifei said: "If you are hungry, you can't freeze, where there is so much gold." ”
Of course, he also admitted that the death of his previous sons had something to do with the fact that he would not take care of him.
But he is already such an old man, and it is difficult to change.
I hope that my daughter will grow up healthy and incapable of being able to take care of her
Looking at Hu Zhifei's "care" for his daughter, many villagers in the village not only sympathized with his situation, but also felt sad and worried about this only remaining little daughter.
The little girl who was less than one year old looked extremely well-behaved and cute, and captured the hearts of many villagers.
Some enthusiastic villagers told reporters that they had thought about helping to take care of the child during the day and let Hu Zhifei go out to work in the field.
However, on second thought, the four children in front of Hu Zhifei died before they were not one year old, and if something happened to this child, I was afraid that it would be difficult to say clearly.
In this way, the villagers' thoughts are dispelled.
After all, the child is by his side, it is not a small responsibility, and it is also a huge blow to cultivate feelings.
Some villagers once proposed to Hu Zhifei that he send his children to welfare institutions or benevolent people who were willing to adopt them, lest he corrupt the children himself.
Hu Zhifei disagreed, the previous four sons have all died, this daughter is his only bit of blood and incense, how can he send his daughter out?
Welfare institutions, the picture comes from the Internet
Moreover, he and his daughter are not without feelings. Although he left early and returned late in order to live, he still had a concern for his daughter in his heart.
If his daughter is gone, Hu Zhifei does not know where he should go.
However, according to the villagers who broke the news to reporters, Hu Zhifei sometimes lost playing mahjong and even threw his child to the ground.
Such an unreliable father who angrily angers the child makes the villagers very worried about the fate of the girl.
Villagers broke the news to reporters that the picture came from the Internet
Under the repeated persuasion of villagers and reporters, Hu Zhifei relaxed: "If there is a good family willing to adopt, I can give him the child." ”
When Hu Zhifei said this, his eyes showed reluctance.
In fact, Hu Zhifei hopes that his daughter can grow up healthy and happy more than anyone.
On Valentine's Day in 2017, Hu Zhifei came to his wife's grave, where he burned incense and hoped that his wife could bless her daughter's healthy growth.
When his wife died, Hu Zhifei buried her on a small hillside opposite his home so that he could see her all the time.
Perhaps it was really Hu Zhifei's wish that came true, and after the local government learned about Hu Zhifei's situation, it took Hu Zhifei as a fixed point to help him, built a new house for him, and advised him to take more time to care for his children.
But it may have come too late.
Small hillside, picture from the internet
Loving Mother Jianqun Weibo and netizens to help together
Hu Zhifei's long-term unhealthy parenting style for his daughter has caused problems with her health.
When she was more than a year old, her daughter only grew one tooth.
Going to the hospital for examination, Hu Zhifei learned that his daughter had severe malnutrition, accompanied by symptoms of epilepsy and hydrocephalus.
Even my daughter's legs are of varying lengths.
Hospital, the picture comes from the internet
Looking at the child's childish face, many loving mothers who learned about the situation united to form a group and wanted to help this unfortunate girl together.
The mothers of the Loving Mothers Group come from all over the world and are engaged in different professions, including doctors, teachers, nurses and so on.
The love for the unfortunate child brought together this group of strangers who had never known each other.
They raised money and took their children to treat hydrocephalus and brain loss. Subsequently, they took their children to Chengdu for rehabilitation.
After treatment, the child still did not learn to walk, but the overall situation has been much better than before.
These mothers pay attention to the growth of the girl, nourishing the girl with their own maternal love, so that she can thrive.
Looking at his daughter who looks more and more beautiful and lovely, Hu Zhifei is grateful and relieved, and only hopes that his daughter's wish to grow up healthy and healthy in the future can really be realized.
In 2021, it has been 5 years since the death of his mentally handicapped wife Zhang Mingying.
In the past 5 years, Hu Zhifei has returned every year to pay tribute to his deceased wife.
After all, it was his only wife in his life, and it was impossible to say that he did not miss it.
At the same time, he also hopes that his wife can bless her daughter to be admitted to a good university in the future, not like the couple.
Today, little Yang En has gone to elementary school.
Elementary school classes, the picture comes from the Internet
Her development is still slower than her peers, and it takes a long time to learn numbers.
But the good news is that she has been able to speak more normally.
When he has time, Hu Zhifei will also send some photos of his daughter's life in the group of loving mothers to reassure them.
Every year, from time to time, "mothers" will come over and take Xiao Yangen to the hospital for review, take her to eat delicious food, or send some clothes, food, textbooks, etc.
Loving "moms", the picture comes from the Internet
It can be said that it is precisely because of the warm big family of society that Hu Laohan's young daughter can grow up in waves.
In this regard, whenever asked, he expressed great gratitude: "We will never forget the help that people in society have helped us." ”
As the saying goes, "The son does not teach, the father is at fault", but for this child, coming to such a family, not only has no opportunity to be educated, but even being well raised has become a luxury.
I sincerely hope that Hu Zhifei's old man can reflect on himself and change his old concepts as his daughter grows up. While farming and supporting the family, he took some time to spend with his daughter.
I also hope that my young daughter Hu Yangen can really be happy and healthy all the time, and walk out of this poor village through her own efforts!
Poor villages, pictures from the Internet
Resources:
1.Hunan Metropolis. "Why are the female neighbors worried about the sixty-year-old man"
2.Guiyang TV. Heart-wrenching! Sixty-year-old father feeds "fat meat" to his 1-year-old daughter to stunted children