Most parents believe that if they pour all their love into their children, they will also get their children's love accordingly.
But in fact, it is not entirely so, whether the child can "buy" the love of the parents, but also depends on the way the parents pour out their love, if the way is not right, then the child is likely to become a "white-eyed wolf".
I have seen several news and videos on the Internet about children turning into "white-eyed wolves".
Case 1:
Not far from the entrance of a certain middle school in a certain place, a girl was punching and kicking her mother, but to everyone's surprise, the mother did not have any intention of refusing or resisting, but silently endured the violence of the child, until the passers-by around her could not see it anymore, and then stopped the child's behavior.
What is even more unexpected is that when the mother saw her daughter being reprimanded by passers-by, she even tried to stop her, lest her child be unhappy.
For this matter, many netizens also expressed their opinions, some think that the mother's love is really unconditional; some people think that the mother's practice is inappropriate and deserves to be beaten; some think that the child is too unreasonable, and the widow is unteachable;
Case 2:
In a shopping mall somewhere, a boy who looks like a schoolboy is punching and kicking his mother, who also only protects herself, but does not criticize and correct the child's behavior, and through the coordination of the mall security, the violence is stopped.
Later, I learned that the reason why the child hit his mother was because his mother did not buy himself a mobile phone that he looked at.
Similar news is not uncommon, such as a college student's father who moved bricks to buy a new mobile phone for his child but was disliked as "not that", a primary school student slapped his mother's face in public only because he hated his mother for having no money, and a middle school student stabbed his parent only because he wanted to "take charge of the family early" and so on.
In these incidents, the children have all committed acts to hurt the parents without exception, but the parents have acquiesced to the children's behavior without exception, and for the child's harmful behavior, "complain with virtue", regardless of their own conditions, they must find ways to meet the child's "needs".
In the eyes of the parents concerned, they have done a good enough job, but the child is a "white-eyed wolf", and he can't do anything about it. But in fact, the reason why children become "white-eyed wolves" can be said to be completely dominated by parents.
Speaking of this, some people may be upset: parents have paid so much for their children, raised their children with painstaking efforts, and were bullied by their children, and finally had to pay for their children's mistakes?
At first glance, it seems that the fault lies with the child, but when we understand the real reason why the child becomes a white-eyed wolf, we will not think so.
Why do children become "white-eyed wolves"? It may be that you "built" it
Children become white-eyed wolves, basically belong to the parents' educational mistakes, that is to say, parents are beaten by their children and children have no filial piety, which are caused by the parents themselves.
Blindly indulge children and treat coddling as true love
Parents love their children is understandable, but many parents mistake doting as love. Strictly speaking, coddling is not love, but an act of "killing".
Excessive protection of children, accommodation of children, not from the right perspective to guide children, let children go with the flow, itself is very irresponsible behavior, children will not be able to improve themselves, children's growth will become futile.
Therefore, parents should learn to "let go" appropriately. Letting go of the hand is not only to let the child do something within his ability, but also to let the child bear some of the results that he should bear, so that the child knows that he is self-reliant and has a sense of responsibility, rather than "having a parent" in everything.
Neglect to correct a child's misconceptions or behaviors
Some parents will neglect to correct when they see that their children have made some mistakes, and the reason why parents do this is that "small mistakes are not worth mentioning".
However, parents have ignored the principle of "stealing needles when they are young and stealing gold", and the child's bad habits and wrong concepts are gradually formed in this little thing, and eventually become a "white-eyed wolf".
Therefore, as parents, if we find that our children have any mistakes in life, such as wrong concepts, behaviors, habits, etc., we need to pay attention to guiding our children to correct them.
Because if the parents do not correct it, the child will think that his behavior is right, and he will be out of control.
Thinking that children are born with a correct view of right and wrong
In the eyes of many parents, children have many "innate" abilities, such as the concept of right and wrong. Parents always feel that anyone should know what is right and what is wrong, and feel that this is a matter of course.
But in fact, when a child comes into this world, there is no correct view of right and wrong, and if parents do not guide and assist in establishing it, the child himself is likely to form a wrong view of right and wrong.
Parents should get rid of the wrong concept that children are "born with", and understand that after the birth of the child, it is a "blank paper", and there is no "natural" ability.
Any concept, thought, behavior, habit, etc., needs to be correctly guided and educated by parents, so that children can be correctly established, otherwise, children are likely to get unhealthy growth.
Parents themselves misbehave, attracting children to imitate
If the parent has a problem, then the child will also have a problem. This is actually a cliché, the influence of parents on children is very large, almost can say what parents are like, children are what they are.
If the parent is a "white-eyed wolf", then the child will learn from it and think that it is right to be a "white-eyed wolf".
Parents should know how to discipline themselves, regulate their moral words and deeds, and make a good example for their children, so that children cannot imitate, and it is naturally difficult to become a "white-eyed wolf".
Write at the end
Parents' contributions to their children are obvious to all, but if the way of giving is not right, it will not have a positive impact on the child, but will have a negative impact.
Therefore, parents must bring their babies scientifically, correctly educate, and let their children inherit the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation of "filial piety, compassion, loyalty, faith, etiquette, righteousness, honesty, and shame.".
(The pictures in this article are from the Internet, if there is infringement, please contact to delete)