01
There is such a sentence on the Internet: "Affection will always be disappointed, and only thin affection will be remembered." ”
You are too affectionate as a person, and you are better to others than to yourself. At this time, it is very common for others to fail you and even hurt you.
When we were young, you and I were both affectionate people, always holding a pure heart to be a person, thinking that they were good, able to impress others, so that others could also treat us affectionately.
Such an idea is nothing more than my own wishful thinking. Because we can't influence others, others don't need us to be influenced. In this way, we only need to achieve "Mingzhe self-preservation".
In the workplace, if you don't learn to protect yourself, many misfortunes will find you. In the social arena, if you don't learn to protect yourself, then you will be deceived and tricked.
Even in the big family, if we are always wishful thinking, I believe that we will also beg for ourselves, and there will be no good ending.
In this regard, many people will wonder, why is there a "really disappointed" thing in the family?
In a word, in the face of human nature, there is not much affection to speak of, only the thin affection and widowhood that you and I cannot guess. At this time, for whom we are sincere and who we have little affection for, we must grasp a degree.
A good understanding of human nature is a compulsory course for you and me in this life.
02
A post-60s sighed that people, the more they attach importance to family affection, the more they will be self-pleading.
Mr. Zhang is 54 years old this year and is facing a difficult problem - he is filial piety, but he is rejected by his brothers and sisters and parents.
In fact, Mr. Zhang is a veritable filial piety, at the age of 44, he personally took care of his father who had suffered a stroke and incontinence, and by the way, he also took care of his mother, and more than half of his monthly salary was spent on his parents.
Because his father is difficult to move and needs close care, Mr. Zhang rented a three-bedroom and a living room for his parents next door in his community, so that his parents could live comfortably and let him take good care of his parents.
When I first started taking care of my parents, my parents were also very happy, thinking that there was no son like Mr. Zhang. However, Mr. Zhang's three younger siblings did not care about anything, which made the old man particularly angry.
However, with the increasing frequency of contact between people, the contradiction between Mr. Zhang and his parents has gradually erupted. Either the parents pick the bones in the eggs today, or tomorrow where they can't do well, they are disliked by their parents.
This life lasted for ten years. At the same time, Mr. Zhang's younger siblings also hate Mr. Zhang more and more, believing that he "has nothing to offer", which is definitely a plot.
Therefore, the three of them joined together and blew the wind in their parents' ears every three to five minutes, which made their parents' trust in Mr. Zhang waver.
03
The so-called "three people become tigers". Because the parents are old and blow the wind in their ears too many times at the same time, the parents also fall to the side of the three children.
Especially in the eyes of his mother, although the eldest son, Mr. Zhang, has taken care of himself for ten years, he may not have done a good job. On the contrary, the three children, although they have not taken care of their parents, believe that they are definitely better than Mr. Zhang.
Man, always like this, thinks that something that has not been tried is good. And the good things that have been tried, but I don't like it. The psychology of far and near smell is particularly serious.
Today's Mr. Zhang, while being rejected by his parents and targeted by his brothers and sisters, has simply become the "enemy" of the whole family, and the more he works, the more thankless he is.
Even Mr. Zhang's wife said that he always liked "foolish filial piety" and that he had not yet reacted to others targeting him. Giving the best to others, and the worst to children and families, really makes me feel helpless.
Once, Mr. Zhang's father, Uncle Zhang, was hospitalized, and as soon as the brothers and sisters came to the hospital, they made a big fuss, either saying that Mr. Zhang was not good here, or that Mr. Zhang was not filial piety, and did not regard him as a big brother at all.
After experiencing these things, Mr. Zhang became more and more aware of the truth of people's hearts and human nature. In his view, people, too heavy on feelings, beyond a certain limit, will eventually be disliked by people, this is a reality that cannot be changed.
04
Why did Mr. Zhang, who has been taking care of his parents for ten years, end up with such an unfortunate end?
One sentence can be summed up, being too responsible, and even assuming responsibilities that do not belong to him, then he can only live more and more unlucky.
It is not that filial piety is not good, but that there are some responsibilities that do not belong to us, so we should not take a big package. Just imagine, you take on the responsibilities of others, then do you really have good results?
Take the care of your parents, for example, and you take on the responsibility of taking care of your parents, which is a good thing. However, if you have taken on the responsibilities of your brothers and sisters, then have you not violated the interests of others?
Once you do a good job and others don't do it well, you can only face the result of being "targeted".
There is a saying in "Dream of the Red Chamber" that people are too high to be jealous, and they are the same as the world.
You live such a high-profile life, even better than others, then others will be jealous of you. At the same time, if you are too noble and noble, then others will think that you are too prominent and hate you.
Even in the family, the result of "living in the same world" will never change.
Know that human nature is similar and does not change because of family affection. In this way, it is enough to be a person who is appropriately desperate and does not belong to his own responsibility, then he does not bear it, and does his duty well.
Wen/Shushan has deer