As the saying goes, those who are close to Zhu are red, and those who are close to ink are black. With what kind of people you are with, you will be affected by what kind of influence. This is true for adults, and it is even more true for children. What kind of person the child is close to, what kind of road will be taken. So these 3 people closest to the child determine the child's life.
The future I want is to see a sense of security
1
The father determines the pattern of the child's life
The father is a mountain, which sets the pattern of the child's life.
An educationalist once said:
Every father is an emissary, and only when the messengers continue to study and correct their own concepts and conduct can the children they cultivate stand on their own feet in the crowd.
In a family, the father is the best example for the child, and usually the child will be proud of the good qualities of the father and demand of himself.
But many families' fathers are busy at work and have no reason to neglect to accompany their children's growth, and their absence is grandiose. As everyone knows, the role of the father has an irreplaceable impact on the child's learning, personality, emotions, quality, physique and other aspects.
1. Understand the world and nature. Nobel laureate Richard Feynman said much of his development came from his father's education. Feynman's father would fix the radio and take him out of the house and get close to nature. When he was a baby, his father took him to play with a bunch of small porcelain pieces, stacked according to the law of color. As a result, he was exposed to several series before he was one year old.
2. Become a game expert. Compared with the careful play of the mother, the father plays differently, preferring adventure and exploration stimulation, and will fully encourage the child to think and adopt the various creative ways of play proposed by the child.
3. Shape a strong character. Professor Yang Fengchi, a professor and psychologist at Capital Medical University, once pointed out that when children are 4 to 5 years old, it is easy to become intimate with parents of the opposite sex. However, if the boy is too close to the mother and too far away from the father in the family relationship, his personality will be weaker when he grows up, and the relationship with the same sex will be easily strained.
4. Establish a sense of rules. Father represents the world of thought, law, order and discipline. Dad puts more emphasis on fairness and responsibility, tells his child the consequences of speaking properly and breaking the rules, and learns to take responsibility.
5. Cultivate brave qualities. Fathers often take their children to explore nature, try sports, and inspire their children's courage. And this kind of bravery will be very helpful for children's future learning and life.
6. Exercise social skills. Fathers are more inclined to help children expand the scope and content of communication, such as teaching children to cooperate and cooperate with each other in games and sports, and children learn how to interact with people from the words and deeds of "authoritative" fathers, and gradually form their own healthy and positive interpersonal communication patterns.
Children who are fully accompanied by their fathers are braver, more confident, generous to others and things, not cowardly, not inferior. Like a little sun, you don't have to rely on the light of others, you are bright enough.
Therefore, if you want to make your child more excellent, the father must first have a big pattern, but also take time to accompany the child, your excellence is the best education for the child.
2
The mother determines the human temperature of the child
The mother is water, moisturizing silently, regulating the atmosphere of the family, giving the child a soft side, and determining the temperature of the child's humanity.
Mo Yan is China's first Nobel Laureate in Literature.
On the podium of the Nobel Prize in Literature that year, he told the world that it was his mother who influenced his life.
He said:
My mother taught me what great love and affection are, what tolerance and understanding are;
What is mercy and compassion, what is honesty and shame;
What is strong and indomitable, what is life and life;
What is learning and life, what is dreaming and ambition.
Children generally have the most contact with their mothers, and from the time they are conceived in October to the time they come into the world, they are more dependent on their mothers.
The mother has a gentle temperament and is good at regulating the family atmosphere, the child will have a peaceful attitude, and the family will be warm and harmonious.
The mother is short-tempered, always likes to lose her temper, quarrel with her husband, and yell at her children.
Children will also be negatively affected, either extremely cowardly or extremely grumpy, and the family atmosphere is cold and ruthless.
Ms. Hong Lan, a doctor of psychology and an expert in brain science, used her brain research report on men and women to clarify from a scientific point of view in her TED speech:
"From the perspective of human evolution, the emotional energy of women is far greater than that of men, the mother is the soul of the family, the mother is happy and the whole family is happy, and the mother is anxious and the whole family is anxious."
The mother is gentle and kind, the mood is warm, the child is optimistic and warm, there is empathy, the mother is moody, the child will be afraid and worried.
The mother determines the temperature of a home, and even more subtly determines the temperature of the child's humanity.
3
The teacher determines the child's learning attitude
In the book The Road to The Goal, author William Damon emphasizes:
"Adults outside the family play a key role in the development of children."
One of the most important roles is the teacher.
The ancients said, "One day is the teacher, and one life is the father." "It can be seen how much influence a teacher has on children."
In education, there will be such a phenomenon:
Once a child has a dislike for a teacher, it is difficult for him to learn this lesson well;
On the contrary, if the child has a good feeling for the teacher in his heart, even if the teacher's teaching level is not high, the student's homework may be learned well.
There are children with good grades and poor grades in every class, and there are many reasons for determining whether a child's grades are good or bad.
But teachers can influence their learning attitudes through their attitude towards their children.
Treat children with good grades, treat them with respect, and do not give them preferential treatment;
Treat children with medium grades, care for them, and do not neglect them;
Treat children with poor grades, look at them with developmental eyes, and find their shining points.
A good teacher may not be able to give children good grades, but it can make children fall in love with learning, rather than hate learning.
The charm of education lies in this, a small action of the teacher can produce such beautiful results.
Many times, the teacher may not know the story, but the seed of hope is quietly sown in the child's heart.
Education in itself means that a tree shakes another tree, a cloud pushes another cloud, and a soul awakens another soul.
Whether it is a parent or a teacher, if you want your child to become more excellent, as the person who can most influence your child, you should first do yourself.
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