Psychologist: The "relationship" between you and your mother determines your future development and destiny Mother is the first platform of our life path. A person is closest to the mother in infancy, in

Psychologist: Your "relationship" with your mother determines your future development and destiny

Mom was the first platform of our life path. A person who is closest to his mother in infancy, mentally, "you have me, I have you". At this time, the mother is the world.

There is a good chance that there is no correlation in a person's life. As with our mothers, we can learn how to develop our own personality and how to treat others.

If a person's relationship with the mother is not very good, or the mother's way of loving the child is flawed, it will inevitably become an obstacle to the future, or even an "obstacle" that cannot be solved. Your "relationship" with your mother determines your future development and destiny.

Jung, a well-known psychologist, said that motherhood refers to intimacy and union. Patriarchy is biased to separate, biased toward standards. All the babies interact with their mothers in the early stages, which will produce basic interpersonal communication.

If the father is the "second-stage push rocket" in the child's development, then the mother is the "first stage push rocket" in the child's development.

Before the age of three, children develop a sense of interdependence with their mothers. In this link, the baby sees his mother and himself as a whole. After the age of three, the child will go through a period of separation, realize that he is a separate individual, and gradually move towards the world.

Therefore, the separation from the mental state of the mother is one of the most important reasons in a person's life, which determines whether an adult can master the intimacy and spacing in interpersonal communication.

In fact, your "connection" with your mother has already chosen your destiny, but you never know.

Mother's influence on boys

A man's love or marital lifestyle lies in the association between his childhood and his mother. This view was first explicitly put forward by Mr. Wu Zhihong.

He felt that the other half the boy was looking for was a microcosm of his own mother. Men are looking for the love of their mothers that they lacked in childhood, for "mothers" who subconsciously have to be similar to their own expectations.

In the early days of young children, the mother's feeding, cold protection and warmth, and various personal behaviors that make him comfortable will make the child regard the mother as the source of his own happiness, and everything the mother does will cause the child's happy reaction.

This response, like a reward, encourages the child and at the same time makes them feel safe. If this continues, the child will progress to a security-dependent approach.

In the later adult dependency, they will moderately grasp the intimate distance and limits with the couple, both boys and girls. In the middle and late stages, both mother and father will affect the child.

If the father chooses a non-main character at this time, the father is weak, the mother is too strong, their children will become less and less confident, because the growth of boys needs a tall and large male image, which is also the mother will not produce.

If the mother often accuses and rebukes the father for being tough, then the child, as a man, must be on the side of the father. When the mother reprimands the father, the child will bring himself into such a persona, so that the more "strong" the mother, the more cowardly the son may be.

At the interpersonal level, they are also not confident and weak, afraid to communicate with others, and therefore miss many opportunities. The roles of strong mothers and inferior fathers are reversed, and boys are unable to learn the most important skills to get along with people (such as communication between friends of the opposite sex).

Boys in a group, usually inferior to other boys, are teased as "no manhood", unable to create a good mutual relationship with male classmates, and slowly become more and more lonely and autistic.

It is difficult to get along with friends of the opposite sex when you grow up, and it is very easy to be single. This is especially important for the growth of boys.

Mother's influence on girls

Girls will also emulate their mother's "female role" in their formative years. Naturally, the harm of fathers to girls is also important.

The father's temperament usually affects the girl's better foundation in the future. Mothers play a role in regulating and helping girls to create physical and mental health personality traits.

Take the example of a tough mother. Strong mothers are very easy to make girls more and more selfish and arrogant, and become arrogant little princesses.

In some homes, mothers and girls have similar temperaments, for example, they are very tenacious and manic, so they are easily nervous.

Anxious sisters are usually mother and daughter with the same aura, because the anxious and uneasy mentality of pregnant mothers is very easy to affect the fetus, and women will endanger the child's intelligence. If the mother is tenacious, she will definitely have a strong girl.

Therefore, when strong mothers educate their daughters, girls will also learn from their mothers and resist their mothers, which makes many mothers "grief-stricken".

Naturally, for girls, strong mothers are better than inferior mothers, that is, "self-confidence" in interpersonal communication is better than "unconfident".

The mother takes care of everything, the child loses himself and is controlled by the mother. In the end, the child cannot do anything, completely relies on the mother, and creates a vicious cycle.

Therefore, the mother will seriously affect the child's interpersonal skills as she grows up. It follows that mothers are indeed critical to their children's futures and even to their successes and failures in interpersonal interactions.