When the New Year comes, relatives inevitably gather together. When relatives asked Xu Mother about the recent situation of her daughter, Xu Mother was in a hurry to change the topic, what made her reluctant to talk about her daughter in front of her relatives?
Fifty-year-old Xu's mother has an only daughter named Xiao Xu. After the birth of her daughter, Xu's mother and husband cultivated their daughter as a lifelong family career, and always hoped that her daughter would be better than others.
Because they were premature babies, but from an early age they were quite harsh on Xiao Xu, saying: "I am for your own good." "There is a good reason, when they study a little and their lives are not doing well, they can scold at will."
Xiao Xu recalled that when she was a child, she was practicing the piano, and as long as she made a mistake, Xu's mother would beat her. In order to let her daughter learn the piano well, Xu's mother even learned the piano first, and then she could guide her when her daughter had something wrong.
Once Xiao Xu couldn't stand her mother's scolding, ran back to the room crying, and closed the door. Unexpectedly, Xu's mother actually went to the kitchen to get a knife out and directly used the knife to split her door.
Xu's mother explained that she was just trying to scare her daughter. Let her not dare to make a mistake. But Xiao Xu confessed that she was very scared at that time, and even thought that her mother was going to chop her to death. Since then, I have buried a foreshadowing of my estrangement from my mother in my heart.
In the years when Xiao Xu grew up, his mother often complained that he was not as lively and cheerful as other children. But I didn't expect that it was because Xu's mother suppressed her every day, scolded him, and even beat her, which led to Xiao Xu's silence.
After my daughter went to work, the relationship between them got worse and worse. Phone calls don't answer, text messages don't return, and even once I've been home nearby, I don't go home to see my parents. In the eyes of the mother, the daughter's work is not a proper job. In her youth, she would rather work in a place like a bar than go home, and even often disappear.
With the daughter video, the daughter also blocked her, and some of Xiao Xu's current situation was known through her daughter's friends. The daughter was like a stranger, the combined time of several years was not more than three days, and even in a trance, Xu Mother even forgot what her daughter looked like.
This time, in order to meet her daughter, Xu's mother found her daughter's friend Xiaomei to match, and finally met Xiao Xu, who had not seen her for more than a year. When the mother saw Xiao Xu appear, she couldn't help but jump over and pick up her daughter, but the daughter broke free of her mother's embrace.
Xiaomei asked Xiao Xu if she would like to communicate with her mother this time and handle their mother-daughter relationship. Xiao Xu said unexpectedly that she was not willing to communicate with her mother, but was willing to communicate with Xiao Mei. Before Xiao Xu's words were finished, her mother immediately interjected and asked, Why are you willing to communicate with others and are not willing to communicate with me? I'm your mom!
Xiao Xu replied helplessly, "I can't talk to you at all." Xiaomei asked Xiao Xu why she didn't want to go home, and Xiaomei said that because she felt that once she came home, her mother would not let her come out of the door again! In order to prevent her daughter from going to work, Xiao Xu's mother even hid all her useful information.
Not to be outdone, my mother immediately asked, "What are you doing when you go out?" Do you go out for pole dancing? In your twenties, dressed in shorter clothes and pants than Kenny, there are so many people watching you in the bar. Pole dancing, posing like that, you don't want a face, I want a face. You don't know what my relatives and friends think of me!"
Xu's mother felt that her daughters were in their twenties, and this kind of dance could not be danced for a lifetime. And in a bar, such a place as a fish dragon, dancing such a dance to please others is not elegant to say.
Xiao Xu said helplessly, "What happened to my pole dancing?" Do I still have to wear long pants and long sleeves to jump? Pole dancing It is necessary to make contact between the skin and the pipe to dance well. I'm dancing so hard now to prove to you that I'm not worse than others! ”
Mother Xu said, "What are you going to prove to me?" Now I can't lift my head in front of my relatives and friends. I don't even want to talk about my daughter's job in front of relatives and friends. Xu's mother recalled that she had worked so hard over the years to provide for her daughter to go to college, and as a result, her daughter actually ran to pole dancing, and she couldn't help but shed tears.
What Xu's mother doesn't know is that Xiao Xu is still quite inferior now, and the shadow of childhood has been haunting him like a nightmare. Daddy smoked her belt, Mom hit her broom handle... These were like demons that had been with her for more than twenty years. Mother Xu beat her and pinched her, showing her no mercy at all. All this made her think about whether I was really their daughter.
Mother Xu even said to her, "I might as well raise you than a dog." Her words were imprinted like a piping hot soldering iron on the heart of his daughter. Let her still feel worse than others everywhere.
From childhood to adulthood, Xu's mother never affirmed her daughter. During the New Year's Festival, in front of relatives and friends, they will praise the daughters of others, and in turn say that their own daughters can't do this or that. Many things the daughter has not finished, the mother is a hammer to deny her.
In order to escape his mother's denial and make one of his hobbies something to be proud of, Xiao Xu has worked hard and even won many awards. But in my mother's mind, xiao Xu's awards could not be on the table at all. So she fled from the family, fled from her mother, fled from everything that was familiar.
In the minds of many people, pole dancing is a kind of passionate and fiery dance. It is even mistaken to think that pole dancing is a kind of dance. In fact, the origin of pole dancing is from some foreign construction workers, because the work is tired, so a dance on the construction site, the current pole dance is more of a competitive project. The pole dance cycle is relatively short, and as people grow older, because of insufficient physical or physical strength, they need to slowly withdraw from this stage, but as a pole dance coach, as a lifelong career. Unfortunately, Xu's mother did not seriously understand pole dancing, only saw its fiery.
Does Mother Xu not love her daughter? I believe that Mother Xu loves her daughter, but she uses the wrong way to express love.
Parents hope that the son will become a dragon and the son will become a phoenix. In fact, their actions are sometimes to force the son to become a dragon, or force the son to become a phoenix. Parents do not understand that anything is mainly persecution, and the persecuted party must be painful and uncomfortable.
Hoping that the child should actually encourage him to become a talent, rather than repeatedly comparing the child with others, to suppress him, always picking the good of others to compare the difference of their own children, the child's self-confidence will be exhausted bit by bit in the process of comparison.
If you want to take the exam to become a parent, I hope that all parents will review it well and express their love for their children correctly!
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