Author | Du Lanjun Source | Dulan (ID: dulantea)
Ending song: Fu Xue - Jin Yu Liangyuan
There is a vivid analogy: if the father is a pen and the mother is paper, then the child is a painting.
A home, run by the father and the mother, how the child grows and develops is also closely related to the parents.
The pattern of the father guides the direction of the family' progress; the mother's emotions create a harmonious atmosphere for the family.
Emerson famously said, "The family is the land of the father, the world of the mother, the paradise of the child." ”
The pattern of the father and the mood of the mother often determine the feng shui and temperature of a home.
The pattern of the father determines the height of the children
The ancients said: "The love of a parent's son is far-reaching." ”
Father, as the most important man on the road to the child's growth, his pattern and vision profoundly affect the long-term development of the child.
The story of "Wounded Zhongyong" is regrettable, if the father is blind, does not want to make progress, and only focuses on small profits, then even if the child has more talent, he will eventually fall into mediocrity.
The father has a big pattern, a broad vision, and sets the right sail for the child's life direction, pointing the right way, so that the child can go smoother and farther.
Ye Shengtao once said: "The four talented daughters of the Zhang family in Jiuru Lane, whoever marries them will be happy for a lifetime." ”
In fact, the four sisters of the Zhang family were talented and virtuous, and they were married to Gu Chuanjiu, a famous character of Xiaosheng, Zhou Youguang, a famous linguist, Shen Congwen, a famous writer, and Fu Hansi, a famous sinologist.
In fact, the Zhang family not only has a daughter Hua, but also six sons, all of whom are outstanding and have studied chinese and Western...
Behind all ten children, there is a good father, the well-known educator Zhang Wuling.
Zhang Wuling has always been an enlightened family, and the educational pattern is particularly broad.
Taking hobbies as an example, Zhang Wuling is not like many parents, blindly instilling their own will in their children, and they do not force their children to learn what they must learn.
On the contrary, he gave his children great freedom of development and room for personal growth.
For example, children can freely enter and leave anywhere in the house; the father's most cherished collection of books, children read freely, never restricted.
But stocking is stocking, and Zhang Wuling will give his own advice:
For example, although he never interfered with the teacher's specific teaching, he would select excellent ancient texts from books such as "Selected Writings", "History", and "Mencius" and let children read them;
In addition, as soon as Zhang Wuling has time, he will take his children to listen to the excellent traditional art of Kunqu Opera.
Along the way, the children of the Zhang family have a wide range of interests and have their own strengths, but they all love reading and Kunqu opera, thus cultivating an elegant interest, which is inseparable from the educational pattern and broad vision of his father Zhang Wuling.
As Zeng Guofan said: "Those who seek great things must pay attention to the pattern." ”
Fathers can not leave their children with all kinds of family wealth, but they must not control their children in a narrow field of vision because of their short-sightedness, and stifle their countless possibilities.
The father's pattern is the real estate of a family, a precious spiritual nourishment, and the sail of the child to the sea of stars.
The mother's emotions determine the temperature of the family
If the father plays the role of the helmsman in the family, then the mother is the regulating valve of a family.
If the mother of a family sighs and sighs all day long and frowns bitterly, then the family will also be lifeless and lifeless;
And when the mother of a family smiles permanently and dresses up refreshed, then the family will also be full of vitality and endless laughter.
Ms. Hong Lan, a Doctor of Psychology in Taiwan and a brain expert, has done a brain study on men and women, and her conclusion is:
The emotional energy of women is far greater than that of men, the mother is the soul of the family, the mother is happy and the whole family is happy, and the mother is anxious and the whole family is anxious.
The mother's emotions affect the atmosphere of the whole family and the direction of the child's personality.
Hu Shi once described his mother as follows: "My mother has a big temperament, a good temperament, the most kind and gentle treatment of others, and has never said a word that hurts people's feelings." ”
The eldest sister-in-law in Hu Shi's family did not understand things, and the second sister-in-law was small, but Hu Shi's mother never quarreled with the two sisters-in-law.
Hu Shi recalled, "They often quarreled, only because of my mother's kind example, and they had never openly scolded and beaten each other." ”
"If I can learn the slightest bit of good temper, if I can learn a little kindness to others, if I can forgive people and be considerate of people - I have to thank my loving mother." 」
The warmth of a home not only comes from material security, but also depends on the temperament of parents, when the emotions are managed well, only to give children an example.
A home is warm because of a mother, inclusive because of a mother, and closely reunited with a mother and constantly rising.
The mother's good temper is the most valuable wealth in the family.
As the first sentence of the text says: "The family is the land of the father, the world of the mother, and the paradise of the child." ”
There is no absolutely complete family in the world, but a father with a broad pattern and a broad vision, and a mother with a kind temperament and tenderness like water,
It will create a family atmosphere full of love and laughter for children, and lead the family to a future full of infinite possibilities and hopes.
Before educating our children, we parents should also receive education and learn how to be a qualified parent.
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