I am a stay-at-home mom, a stay-at-home mom who is constantly fulfilling her self-worth. Reject anxiety, refuse "inner volume", easy parenting, rational treatment of married life, tolerant response to the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I hope that some of my views can make you suddenly enlightened, can bring you positive energy, and solve your practical problems.
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Another Korean goddess who has a relatively popular audience in China has entered the palace of marriage, Park Shin-hye, we have all grown up watching her plays, and the audience base is still very good.
Everyone has always thought that the goddess is single, suddenly exposed the love affair, and then suddenly entered the palace of marriage, and it is Fengzi who is married.
Park Shin-hye, who walked into the marriage hall with a pregnant belly, is full of happiness, but her marriage is not optimistic about many netizens.
Many netizens directly called out: strong women and weak men are difficult to marry for a long time.
Why is it difficult for a strong woman and a weak man to have a marriage that lasts?
Netizens' concerns are not unfounded, because they have seen too many such examples, especially in the entertainment industry, where it is easier to get married and easier to divorce.
However, there are also some good cases, when Yuan Yongyi and Zhang Zhilin were combined, they were strong women and weak men, and Qi Wei and Lee Seung-hyun were also strong women and weak men.
Netizens said that Yuan Yongyi and Zhang Zhilin are fairy companions, not exaggerated at all, so many years have passed, the two people have withstood gossip, full of love, and a handsome son.
And Qi Wei and Lee Seung-hyun needless to say, Lee Seung-hyun is a real treasure man, the first generation of boy band, singing and dancing instruments are all-powerful, the business ability is superb, but after marriage, in order to complete Qi Wei, became a full-time father.
Full-time mothers have some bitterness and difficulties and mentality, full-time fathers will also have, the key is to see how to adjust their mentality, in order to get through this critical stage.
But in the current environment, stay-at-home mothers are more common, just as it is more common for men to be strong and women to be weak.
There is such a legend on the Internet: doctoral men looking for master's women, master's men looking for undergraduate women, undergraduate men looking for specialist women, specialist men looking for high school girls, doctoral women and rural men are left.
Of course, this is just a choreographed joke, but it can more or less reflect the marriage pattern in the big picture.
This is the obstacle of "strong women and weak men".
In the big environment, the weaker party in a family, especially when the man is weak, needs to bear double the internal and external pressure.
The adjustment is not good, and the result is to part ways.
The durability of a marriage depends on the depth of understanding of the marriage by both parties
A marriage can last, and both parties need to help each other, understand each other, and tolerate each other.
Marriage can only last if two people truly understand that the true meaning of marriage is to give, not to take.
From a macro point of view, the equality of harvest and payment, at least the gap is not large, in order to maintain a balanced state, but all day long thinking about how much to harvest and how much to pay, it is impossible to maintain a balanced mentality.
Only when both sides only want to give, can we easily achieve a state of balance.
Not only material efforts, but also spiritual contributions.
I have seen a personal case shared by netizens on the Internet before, and two people have gone to the point of divorce because of half a watermelon.
Every time the wife eats watermelon, she will remember to leave half for her husband, but every time the husband eats watermelon, he only leaves her a "watermelon peel" and eats the best meat in the center.
The wife was very aggrieved, and once it finally broke out, but the husband felt incredible, thinking that the wife was calculating, and quarreled with him for the watermelon worth only twenty dollars.
Look, those who have been taking advantage of each other always feel that it is a small thing, a thing that is not worth mentioning, and this is the most hurtful thing.
It is precisely because of this attitude of the husband that the couple finally went to this step of divorce.
Until the divorce, men still feel that women are not tolerant enough and are preoccupied.
The problem between the two people seems to be because of half a watermelon, but in fact, it is because the man lacks the attitude of giving mentally, resulting in the imbalance in the other person's heart.
If this man has maintained such a perception and cannot see his own problems, he cannot get a happy marriage.
The danger is that such a father is prone to raising the same son.
Can children enhance the stability of a marriage?
Some people also say that whether women are strong and men are weak, or men are weak, as long as two people have children, the stability of marriage will increase a layer of security.
There is some truth to this statement.
Children will increase the stability of the marriage to a certain extent, especially if both parties love children, will give priority to the child's feelings, and hope that the child can have a complete family.
But this is only part of the reason, this is a process of weighing, depending on the specific situation of both parties, if the feelings of both parties disappear, the relationship deteriorates, this bad influence has seriously affected the other party's emotions and normal life, both parties will consider the bad impact of this bad influence on the child, and then make a new choice.
So children don't guarantee that marriages will last, which is why so many children come from divorced families.
People are always weighing various pros and cons, and when it comes to the most critical time, the first consideration may be their own feelings.
However, if the problem is not big and the gap is not deep, the child can indeed solve many contradictions, so that both parties can endure it, so that the relationship can be alleviated.
Be a responsible partner, be a responsible parent
A child who has been hurt will often pretend to be indifferent, strongly support the divorce of parents, think that a single-parent family or a two-parent family does not affect the child's feelings, and think that the current child has become independent and personal enough not to care whether the parents can accompany them.
The representative is Xiao Xiao, who has been growing up with his mother, and his growth experience is also more inspirational, and he often expresses such views.
In fact, people who can express such views really show that children have been hurt.
Don't say that children don't care, all children will care, because all children love their parents deep down, but under the influence of various factors, this love combined with their immature minds will change taste.
So as a parent, don't take this to comfort yourself, when the marriage is bad to a certain extent, it is not only you who are hurt, but also the children.
Children are the most innocent.
The more the child behaves indifferently, the more he cares in his heart, and the more he is hurt.
I want to say to the young, whether it is a strong woman, a weak man, or a strong man and a weak woman, these are not the main factors, if you are really prepared, really welcome the arrival of the child, you must take into account the child's feelings, be a responsible parent.
At the same time, I want to say to young people that falling in love can be very sloppy, and even believe in "love at first sight", but "starting from the appearance, and finally talent" must be understood.
If you want to get married, you still have to be fully prepared and fully understood, because once the relationship is determined and you are in the palace of marriage, you must be responsible for yourself, your partner, and the future children.
The more sane the young man is, the more secure the marriage, the fewer the number of unhappy children and the better the world will be.