The final exam has just ended, a few joys and a few sorrows. Some children hold back stacks of awards of various names, and some children are dejected and have no return.
The same class in the same school, the same teacher learning, there are good and bad grades, only because people are different, some people have a very high talent for reading, some people are smart but mistaken by smart. Anyway, 360 lines, the lines must be done by someone.
Xiao Yu, who was reading the third year of junior high school, heard her classmates showing off the fast track to earn pocket money, she inquired carefully, and it turned out that the parents promised to recycle 10 yuan per award certificate.
This classmate was originally a bully, coupled with the final exam results are very good, he not only got spiritual rewards in school, large and small awards received soft hands, to the home also got the material embodiment of his parents, a moment of excitement can not be done, back to the class began to share his secret of getting rich.
The speaker has no intention, the listener is intentional, Xiaoyu thinks that it is this rare opportunity to "get rich", so he returned home and mentioned it to his father, and he did not expect that his father would happily agree to do the same.
This gave the usually low-key, introverted light rain as if it was a stimulant, and she rushed into her room like a rabbit, rummaging through boxes and cabinets to find the award certificates that were usually randomly placed. Unexpectedly, the east and west sheets were picked up, and more than 30 pieces were harvested in one semester.
Seeing his daughter directly move out a large pile, dad was stunned: it turned out that his daughter was a certificate harvester, and she got so much in one semester, a proper invisible bully!
While the father is distressed about the wallet, he is caught in infinite self-blame and introspection: is the child hiding too deeply, or does he not spend time and energy to pay attention to the child's growth? Fortunately, everything has to be done, the regret with a smile in the tears, and there are still many opportunities to make up.
Xiaoyu has never let her parents worry about her parents since she was a child, she is not only a "child of other people's families" in the eyes of her neighbors, but also a cadre in the class, the president of the society, and every semester, the award certificate is almost weak.
Parents also know that their daughters are excellent, but the father is busy with his livelihood and cares about his children's learning, and he has more than enough heart and insufficient strength.
Children are the most important cause in a parent's life, how can parents educate their children while juggling their work and career? We should be able to learn a lot of inspiration by understanding the following three points:
What is the real role of parents in the child's education process?
Giving birth to a child is only an animal instinct, does not need special functions, as long as the husband and wife are healthy can do it; raising children is also very simple, there are standards for eating and wearing warmth, poor and poor, rich and rich, anyway, children can grow up.
Birth and raising, for parents, is not much of a problem, the focus and difficulty lies in the child's education. Being too harsh and harsh on children may cause them to be cowardly and inferior; blindly pampering children is a bottomless doting.
Adding one point and subtracting one point has its own unique measure and boundaries. We all know that parents are the first teachers of children, but also the teachers who do not retire for life, but also the guides, companions, and listeners.
At each stage of a child's development, the role played by parents is different. In the child's 0 to 3 years old stage, the role of the parent is the guardian spirit; in the child's childhood stage, the parent's role is the playmate; in the child's adolescent stage, the parent is the coach; in the child's adolescence and beyond, the parent plays the role of a friend.
In the process of growing up, which abilities are the core? How to correctly set the role of parents, and how to grasp the boundaries and sense of proportion in each role? These are the places where parents need to learn throughout their lives.
How to cultivate a child's sound personality
The college entrance examination is not the end of life. On the contrary, the college entrance examination is only the starting point of life after that. When educating their children, many parents always focus too much on their children's academic performance, test scores, and further education, and neglect to cultivate their children's sound personality.
Li Yang, if you only look at academic performance, college entrance examination, career achievements, etc., he is the direction and role model for many parents to cultivate their children. However, his personality is flawed, and even if his career is successful, he still has not lived his life well. Due to personality reasons, he caused great harm to his wife and children, and ultimately affected his career.
We have only one ultimate goal in raising children, and that is to help children form happiness. Only people with sound personalities have the ability to be happy and have the ability to run a business.
Personality includes self-confidence, personality, the ability to balance emotions, the meaning of education is to bring children from the state of ignorance, into a rational state, a state of reason, so that they become a rich heart, love, sense of responsibility of the social person.
The true meaning of education is an enlightenment, an awakening, an opening, a kind of ignition, a kind of enlightenment, a kind of enlightenment. Instead of ignoring the child, not caring, not paying attention, and letting it play freely.
Material rewards are simply a supplement to spiritual rewards
Children do housework, should parents pay wages? If the child does well in the test, should parents use material rewards? Questions such as these have always been justified and have no absolute standard answers.
No matter what we do, we have a degree of certainty. The so-called too much is this truth. When educating children, many parents attach importance to spiritual motivation, but many parents attach importance to material motivation.
Spiritual motivation can mobilize the child's internal driving force, and it is more conducive to cultivating a sound personality of children, especially in the formation of good character such as self-esteem, self-love, and self-confidence, and it is inseparable from spiritual motivation. As the saying goes: The more the child boasts, the smarter he is, and the spiritual encouragement can directly give the child the motivation to create materials.
And material encouragement, if the child needs to give a certain material reward no matter what the child does, then over time, the child becomes a slave to the material encouragement.
Thus developing the utilitarian concept of "no profit and no action", only doing things that are beneficial and profitable, and resolutely not doing things without material returns, in this way, material encouragement will evolve into a driving force for doing things. Such values are incorrect. If a person's three views are not correct, can he still become a person who is useful to society? Absolutely impossible!
Therefore, although there is no absolute good or bad distinction between spiritual motivation and material incentive, there must be a distinction between primary and secondary, and material incentives are only a supplement to spiritual incentives. When parents motivate their children, they must weigh and grasp the measure again and again.