In the process of raising children, children are always on the edge of their parents' bottom line, and from time to time they will create some trouble for their parents and provoke their parents to be angry.
Parents discipline and even punish children is not to blame, but when discipline and punishment, we must also distinguish between ways and occasions, inappropriate and inappropriate discipline, the impact on children is very negative.
The mother educates the child in the subway and makes him kneel in public
Recently, on the Beijing subway, it was the morning rush hour, and the carriages were crowded with people. A child around 7 or 8 years old plays with a mobile phone in his seat.
I don't know why, the mother first pulled the child's face with her hands, and even pulled off the mask on the child's face, and the child himself silently put on the mask.
Then the mother took off the child's hat again, which was still not relieved, and the mother took the child to another carriage, threw the bag to the ground, and let the child kneel on it, and the child did not refute it, and kept kneeling on the ground.
After arriving at the station, the mother did not tell the child to stand up, but took care of herself and inserted herself off the subway, while the child followed the mother with a school bag.
The passenger dissuaded him from being intimidated: "My child wants him to do whatever he wants."
In the face of such a scene, the surrounding passengers really can't look down, and there are well-meaning people who come forward to persuade them, but instead of appreciating it, the mother directly replied: "I said my child, I want him to do what I want."
After watching the video content, Kojima really disagreed with the mother's approach, no matter how angry, no matter how much he hated iron and steel, he could not be mad in public, and he also adopted the punishment method of letting the child kneel in public.
I remember my grandmother at home once said: "The children should be locked up, and you must not beat the children outside." But the seemingly simple truth, many parents do not understand.
This way is not to educate children, but to humiliate children, children of this age, already have a strong sense of self-esteem and shame, they will be very concerned about the evaluation of people around them and around them, the so-called "face" is not the exclusive of adults, children also care.
When any child grows up, he does not want to recall the scene when he knelt in public as a child, and perhaps decades later, he will not remember why he made his mother angry, but the "shame" when kneeling will be remembered for a lifetime.
Because this memory will be like a nightmare, it will become a scar in his mind that can never be erased, and even the child will be affected by it, and from then on, he will have an inferior personality, self-abandonment, and even resentment towards his parents in his mind.
These are an insurmountable pit for people, just like what happened before: a mother was called to school by the teacher because her child was playing cards in class, slapped the child in the hallway in public, and after the mother left, the child directly jumped over the railing and jumped...
Although I don't know what mistakes the mother punished for what mistakes the child made, after this incident, I reckon that there will definitely be a gap between the child and the mother, and even this gap will take a lifetime to heal.
Parents forcing their children to kneel is not only humiliating the child, but also suspected of breaking the law
It is undeniable that it is bound to be the child who makes the mistake first, which makes the mother very angry, but even if the child makes the biggest mistake, it is obviously wrong to let the child kneel in public.
Although the child is young, he is also a "natural person" with independent personal rights and dignity rights, and even the parents, such behavior violates the Law on the Protection of Minors.
Mothers force children to kneel in public places such as the subway, which is already a typical insult and similar violence, if the situation is serious, it is not to say that "their children can manage as much as they want", and it is likely to be punished with administrative punishment. Naturally, considering the identity of his guardian, it is to a large extent admonished him.
Kojima would like to say:
Children's hearts are fragile and sensitive, whether it is education or criticism, they all hope that parents can look at problems from their point of view and pay attention to their children's inner feelings.