With the continuous passage of time, more and more post-80s and post-90s have gradually grown into parents of primary and secondary school students, and as the first generation of parents who have been released, the parenting concept of post-80s and post-90s has become more practical than that of their parents. Post-80s, post-90s life growth era, reading good books, college is the best shortcut to change the fate, and now with the reform of the Internet era, our society has become more diverse, post-80s, post-90s parents have also become a lot of Buddhism in terms of parenting.
Buddhism does not mean that there are no contradictions, and today's children also have their own types of parents who hate the most:
Parents who don't count when they speak:
As a primary and secondary school student game is still a necessity in children's lives, like to do games is also the nature of every child, so the demand for toys and outings is often able to improve the child's interest and efficiency. Therefore, many parents often use this to regulate some of their children's behavior habits, but many parents only stay at the level of talking, and cannot be redeemed in time for various rewards that have promised their children, and in the long run, talking does not count has become the biggest slot point for children to hate parents.
In addition, if parents often talk and do not count, it will also have a great impact on the growth of children, and the attitude of parents to talk is easy to let the children eventually let the children inadvertently develop the habit of untrustworthiness. Therefore, parents' commitments to their children must be fulfilled in time, even if they cannot be fulfilled on time because of unexpected situations, they should also be remedied in a timely manner, the purpose of this is to maintain the invisible contract spirit between parents and children, and the most important thing is to prevent children from lying to parents in the future and missing key educational opportunities.
Parents with communication barriers:
More and more parents will inadvertently find out how their children suddenly talk to themselves like a villain or when the couple is discussing something, the child suddenly interjects and says his point of view. Some questions that children occasionally ask or exchange views, in the cognition of many parents, feel that this should not be a problem that children of this age should know or talk about. At this time, many parents may put their children aside and close the opportunity for their children to think and express.
This is a typical case of parents who are unwilling to communicate, such parents often do not sink their hearts to listen carefully to the problem from which perspective the child is observing, and the perspective of the child's observation of the problem is often a point of penetrating family education, grasping this point Many problems can be solved, but many parents choose to ignore. If the child's ideas cannot be fully expressed in front of the parents, and the effect of communication with the parents is almost zero, the consequences of the child's rebellion can be imagined.
Overly anxious parents:
Anxiety is a true portrayal of many parents of children now, and the anxiety of many parents will be invisibly transferred to their children. Because I was worried about my child's grades, I enrolled my child in tutoring classes in various subjects, and because I was worried that my child did not have talent, I enrolled my child in various interest classes. However, many parents do not understand the reasons for the child's poor academic performance and the child's real interests and hobbies before enrolling in the class, and finally the parents report various tutoring classes and interest classes to their children according to their own feelings, and the result of this is likely to make the child feel bored or rebellious.
In addition, anxiety can also lead to parents becoming very demanding of their children, and a large amount of scientific data confirms that children who grow up under strict discipline often lack creativity. Of course, there is a real problem that has to make all parents vigilant, that is, parents pass this on to their children, but whether the child's ability to bear it is so strong as the parents imagine, jumping off the building, jumping into the river and other suicide scenes occur frequently in primary and secondary school students, which has to make all parents reflect on their own requirements for a child is not too strict?
As parents of children, in the process of education, we must pay attention to and rationally analyze the child's acceptance of knowledge and truth in a timely manner, and we must respect the real differences between our children and other children. In the process of education as a parent, we should find more of the child's advantages, and then in the process of giving play to the child's advantages, the child's shortcomings are timely targeted to improve, so that the child can truly have a happy childhood of their own, and the happy childhood seed planted by parents in the child's heart will also be the beginning of the child's happiness in life.
(Note: This article is published with the permission of Tang Tang Wa Ka Parenting)