Recently, there is a news that makes people talk about it, what is the matter? It is said that a man brought his girlfriend to meet his mother, which was a good thing, because the mother saw that there were uneaten leftovers at the neighboring table and felt that it was wasted. When the man saw his mother's behavior, he angrily took his girlfriend and left, and he felt that his mother's behavior made him very faceless.
In fact, things are small things, and it is true that they often happen around everyone. Some people may be used to the fact that the mother is always very frugal, and she can do whatever she wants. Some people are more sensitive, after all, it is something that others have eaten, and no one lacks these few dishes, and they feel that there is no need to do this.
Men love face is not the beginning of modern talents, how many years of feudal system in ancient China, the status of men is unshakable, the status of women is low, it is only in the period of the Liberation War, it began to unshackle the shackles of thousands of years, modern society machismo men are not in the minority. When the mother went to get the leftovers, the man felt faceless and normal.
Seeing such a thing happen, everyone's views must be different. The supporter of her mother must be the generation that has experienced the hardships of life like her. Those who support men will certainly have experienced the same things as him and feel faceless. In fact, no one is right or wrong, but their respective angles are different, which will lead to a good meal and unhappy.
The generations after the 80s and 90s have basically not caught up with anything particularly difficult. For example, there is no food to eat, the family has no financial resources, but everyone's parents have experienced these things, perhaps when they were young, a family of several people, can not eat meat several times a year, usually the conditions for eating and wearing are not very good.
The ages are different, and the experiences are certainly different. The generation of parents, not to mention that eating is not good, that is, usually eating is definitely mutual humility, a little bit of eating is eager to break into several petals to eat. People who have experienced these things, even if the society is developing well now, for them will not forget the hardships of their childhood.
Waste is very heart-wrenching for that generation, and looking at the waste of food or other things by modern people, they can't accept it. The rapid development of society is a good thing, but it does not mean that modern people have wasted capital. For example, food, how much to eat, or how much to eat. Ordered and not eaten, and finally became kitchen waste.
This mother represents a generation of people who use their own hands to create a better life for their children, but such efforts are not wasted for their children. They didn't let their children eat leftovers, they just couldn't see the conditioned reflexes themselves. The man's departure is helpless and heartbroken for the mother.
There is another problem that the mother eats leftovers from the table next to the table, and that is the hygiene problem. Maybe the parents' generation, in order to survive, can't care much about the health problem. But in modern society, since the conditions are in place, why can't we control it?
After the birth of a child, kindergarten and then grow up, parents and teachers will be very concerned about washing hands and paying attention to hygiene. The child develops such a habit, and as a result, the mother eats the leftovers that others have eaten. For this, the child is certainly unacceptable, and as a parent, he is doing something against him after teaching by example, which is certainly contradictory.
It is understandable that the generation of parents is not accustomed to waste, but eating leftovers at the next table is a bit extreme. They can tell their children not to be extravagant and wasteful, how much to eat. Even if there are a few dishes left, take them away, or eat them one by one. These behaviors can be understood, and they will not cause the child to be angry and go away.
Especially the first time the son takes his girlfriend to see his parents, it is a very happy thing, even if the mother usually has these habits, it is good to restrain a little at the critical time. Perhaps this mother wants her future daughter-in-law to be able to understand her true self. But for the behavior of eating leftovers from the adjacent table, it is also unnecessary.
After analyzing the previous two points, it is not difficult to see that the lack of effective communication between children and parents will make a good thing unhappy. Parents rarely talk to their children about what kind of life they lived when they were young, it may be too difficult to think about, or it may be secretly telling themselves that they must make their children live well.
Without real examples, the next generation of children who have not experienced it will certainly not be able to understand their parents. Some parents will occasionally chat with their children about the past, but they only take a sentence, and the children do not have that concept in their minds, and naturally they still do not understand the hardships of their parents. In fact, sit down and talk calmly about what kind of hard life my parents lived because of what they did when they were young.
Children are willing to listen to their parents' sharing, but if they are preached, children will be rebellious. It is not their fault that their children are born to catch up with the good times, it is their luck. It is not a waste to be able to guide children in other ways, rather than having to educate children by eating leftovers from the next table.
And the children also need to communicate with their parents, knowing that the mother has such a habit, he can say in advance, tell the parents not to do such things in front of their girlfriends. And in ordinary life, talk to them more about the harm of eating other people's leftovers. Parents and children are the closest people to each other, non-stop communication will definitely have an effect, directly angry departure can solve what?
After saying so much, it is not difficult to see that although it is only a small thing, it has inadvertently hurt each other's hearts. The son is angry that the mother does not give him face, and the mother is angry that the son does not understand himself. The fuse may just be a matter of eating leftovers at the next table, but it is actually a problem between family members. If the son does not bring his girlfriend and the mother goes to serve the leftovers at the neighboring table, the son will not be so angry.
He probably cared about it, and he must have persuaded his mother not to do it again. The mother did not listen to her son's persuasion because she felt she had her own ideas. When a son brings his beloved to his parents, he wants both parties to have a good impression of each other. Because his parents and girlfriend are people he loves, the mother does not understand his intentions, which makes the son very sad.
He was afraid that his girlfriend would have a bad opinion of his mother, and he deeply understood that it was not easy for his parents, but his mother also ruined the meeting he had arranged, which was the reason why his son was angry. The son is angry and leaves with his girlfriend, it must be his fault, after all, in front of the elders, won't the parents feel faceless when they leave like this?
It can be seen that both sides have problems, and may have some of the same things in ordinary life, more or less experienced. Don't run into problems and leave in disgust when it breaks out. To know that this can not solve the problem, we must often communicate with each other to understand each other, stand on each other's side and think about it, after all, they are the people who love each other the most.