Hello everyone, I'm Star Man.
The process of a child's growth is also the process of his understanding of the world.
Every parent expects to cultivate their child into a person with opinion, quality and understanding of the rules, so when the child's behavior is wrong, parents use various means to correct it.
So, is there an error in your means of correcting errors?
Which corrective measures are wrong?
Let's take a look at how parents correct their children's mistakes from a child's morning!
In the morning, the child is still sleeping, and the parents wake him up in a hurry: "Baby get up quickly, otherwise you will not be able to catch the kindergarten school bus!" Hurry up, hurry up! ”
The child is eating breakfast, and the parents see it and breathe: "Can you eat it quickly, this is not hot or cold!" Oops, don't take the spoon like that! Don't play, hurry up! ”
The baby went out to take the school bus, and the mother nagged in her ear: "Baby, what about your hat?" Did the toilet go? How come I haven't gone to the toilet at this time! The school bus is coming soon! ”
Look, do you say the most to your children every day is "hurry" and "hurry"?
But as a mother, I believe you are also helpless, many children are like this, if you do not urge, the child will not move, urge a urge to move, a little self-consciousness of learning.
We always feel that children are not conscious enough, so we are anxious to change the child's bad problems, so that the "hurry + correct" model will only make parents more and more tired, and children will not become conscious.
A parent also reported to me that he read a lot of parenting books, but one night at dinner, because he said that he let the child "lift the chopsticks up a little" and "cover the tablecloth on the leg" and other small things, the child said "Mom, I think you are very annoyed".
This parent was very depressed, he did not speak loudly, and he kept speaking softly.
I told her that this method of "reasoning + correcting mistakes", although gentle, is actually a kind of "control".
How do I correct my child's mistakes?
First, what you have to do is reflect.
Think about whether you were really right before you corrected your child's behavior?
Although you are an adult and have a stronger ability to think, not all behaviors are necessarily right, you just want to pass on your experience to your child, but it may limit your child's development and progress.
For example, children like to play games, and in the case of ensuring the health of the eyes, it is not necessarily a bad thing, which is an important means of cultivating the speed of the child's brain.
Children like to be multi-purpose, not necessarily a manifestation of inattention, perhaps this era needs talents who can hold multiple positions at the same time.
Children have a stronger sense of equality and self-defense, not necessarily selfish and rebellious, because equality is the need of social development.
Many parents who do a good job in parenting will reflect on their own behavior and opinions, so they will not rush to correct their children. Correct correction may mean giving up error correction.
But maybe you will be a little confused when you see this: then you can't do nothing, right?
Of course not, at the Star Care Institution, our teachers always bend down, put themselves down, put themselves on an equal footing with their children, and then work together to "discuss" solutions:
First, we must remember that children have only "characteristics" and no so-called advantages and disadvantages, so do not judge right and wrong with subjective ideas, but treat children with an objective perspective.
Second, see where the child is doing well, give encouragement and recognition in time, let the child have a sense of achievement, and experience the feeling of being affirmed.
Third, using a variety of games to change the child from "I should" to "I do", this is a process that requires patience, because the children like to play games, naïve and time-consuming.
So, when you can't get started in the face of your child's "wrong" habits, you may wish to try the way of star hero!
When children understand the world, they have too many thoughts in their heads and will make various behaviors, but they must go through to open up their own life path.
When parents judge the child's right and wrong in a subjective sense and correct the child, have they ever considered that they just want the child to live as they are ideal, not the way he should be?
Scientific parenting
Accompanied by 3Q Kids Business School
Parenting is a science of science, and every week the video number regularly updates the knowledge of scientific parenting. It aims to let every parent understand a little scientific knowledge and prescribe the right medicine in order to achieve the greatest results. Pay attention to us, and guard the baby's happy growth together!