Whether the child is excellent or not has a lot to do with the mother's personality!

The eminent educator Sukhomlinsky said:

"Every moment, when you see the child, you see yourself, and educating the child is also educating yourself and testing your own personality traits."

I don't know if you can pay attention to how mothers are portrayed in many celebrity growth stories:

The mother is gentle, virtuous, reasonable, and always silently dedicates herself selflessly to her children without complaint,

The mother is tenacious, kind-hearted, and assertive, as if nothing can kill the mother...

Only in this way is it possible for a mother to create such a wonderful child.

Because children have a natural dependence on their mothers at a young age, the mother's temperament, language expressions and ways can endanger the child's life.

How can we make the child's personality habitually not follow the reverse development trend of the mother's temperament and follow the characteristics of the mother?

The best way is for the mother to restrain the light of the child in front of the child's eyes and become a mother in the true sense.

The mother is in front of the child's eyes, not at the conference table, and does not have to treat the child with accusations, harshness and the ultimate vision.

The mother's harsh and mean mentality, harsh language expression, control of everything behavior and arrogant discrimination, the damage to the child's self-esteem and self-confidence is far greater than that of China's test-taking education.

As far as the child is concerned, from the moment he is born, the child's rules for the role of the mother are almost unchanged.

How to be a good mother who meets the standards:

Enter the door and forget your unpleasantness

Before entering the door, mom tries to remind herself:

Forget all the unpleasant things in the company, and from now on, it is the role of mother's game.

Teach the child that the mother must be very happy, and do not transfer the bad mentality that has nothing to do with the child to the child, because the child is wronged.

2. A child's small honor is important

When the child is interested in informing his mother that he has a five-pointed star or a big red flower on campus today, don't mainly show boredom or disdain, and be sure to praise him as happily as the child.

The most appropriate expression is "can you let your mother see it"...

To share this joy with him, this honor is very important for children.

3. "Ignorant" mom

When the child comes to ask the mother, "How to pronounce this word" and other questions that have been expressed, the mother tries not to respond to him immediately, and the worst response is "how do you not even know this word".

Mom had better take a look at it and say, Oh, I don't understand, let's look up the dictionary together, okay?

After a few times, the mother taught the child to apply the dictionary, at the same time, the child will be very satisfied after checking the dictionary to understand the word, and after many times, he will cultivate the habit of viewing materials without relying on the mother.

4. Calm and calm, calm, must be calm and calm

When the child tells the mother that the exam is not good today, the mother must restrain her mentality, and certainly cannot lose her temper or look gloomy, and the child is anxiously observing the mother's face at this time.

Therefore, it is best for the mother to show no change in mentality, let the child take out the test paper, and analyze what is wrong with the child.

If the child already understands what is wrong, the mother does not have to dwell on it anymore.

But ultimately support him: you see, you figured out what you'd do for the next exam.

If mom feels like she can't control herself, she goes to the bathroom to wash her face, look in the mirror, and do some deep inhalation.

5. I used to be a coward

When a child shows cowardice before the test or before doing something very important, the mother must not dismiss or reprimand him for being timid or mainly acting more anxious than he is.

That will exacerbate the child's mental stress and cause the child to be unable to give full play to everything normally.

At this time, the mother had better say to the child very simply, no matter how you do, the father and mother are not as good as you at that time when you are so old, don't worry.

At this time, the child will have a lot of confidence and self-confidence in his heart, and he will give full play to it stronger than usual.

6. Deal with the unsuccessful, everyone is a little more tenacious

When the child is frustrated or frustrated, the mother should show tenacity and never give up, and rationally tell the child that unsuccessful only means a moment, does not mean that the child is not successful for life.

When the child does not feel that she has to give up, the mother first shows that she has no expectations.

The worst thing is to use harsh and harsh language to express ridicule him, to complain about the child as useless, and even to calculate the old account together.

Children under the education of such a mother culture will be extremely inferior, and even give up their own happy development prospects.

7. "You must be", "You should be.."

Mothers should not express their opinions in advance before the child has expressed what she wants to say clearly, whether the child wants it or not, and instruct the child in the tone of "you must...", "you should..."

Represent the child's opinion with his own opinion and stipulate that the child should practice it.

Mom must not become synonymous with "dictatorship."

Children who grow up in such situations lack ideas, lack of judgment on right and wrong.

A fair association should be created between the mother and the child (fairness is not unprincipled) and understand that they respect each other.

8. The damage comes from those closest to you

Mothers have to manage the way they speak before their children's eyes.

The mother is the one who holds the best control of the child in the world, so the mother knows best where the flaws of her child lie.

If the mother often takes the child's shortcomings directly when she speaks, to ridicule, accuse or threaten, or deliberately tells the child to do it because she knows that the child cannot do it.

This is obviously the pain point of using the sharpest equipment to continuously cut the child.

The child's heart will be hurt because the damage comes from the people closest to him.

9. "Concise and clear language expression + silence and silence" > nagging continuously

The mother is in front of the child's eyes, manipulating the total number of verbal expressions.

Don't nag. In fact, what worries children the most is the silence of the mother.

Therefore, rather than nagging the child endlessly, it is better to tell the child in plain and concise language about the incorrect or what to pay attention to.

Below, the mother's silence is obviously more effective than speaking again, and it is not necessary to think that the child does not understand, although he pretends not to care, but in fact he is watching to see if the mother is telling the truth.

Dear mothers, you don't have to wait for your child to grow up and keep saying him, how do you have that kind of temperament, which one are you like?

It goes without saying that Mom and Dad are the child's teachers, and the child's temperament lies in your usual mentality towards him.

In order to have better children, we encourage all parents to do so.