The flowers in the greenhouse are difficult to withstand the wind and rain, and the grass that dares to accept the baptism of wind and rain can thrive.
In daily life, we often see parents like this: children run and jump, parents rush to stop, worried that they will fall; children's shoelaces are open, parents bend down to tie him; children take a little heavy object, parents are distressed... Parents do everything, seemingly for the sake of children, but in fact will hurt the children, parents love too much, for children is not honey, is arsenic.
01
Overprotectation is not love, but harm
Psychologist Li Xue once said: "A body can only bear one soul, if the parents' control is airtight, the child is essentially mentally dead." ”
Excessive love and everything by parents will make children lose their ability to be independent, difficult to integrate into society, and even affect the development of a lifetime.
1. Children are prone to lack of independence.
Parents' love for their children is beyond reproach, but too much doting and pampering will only make it difficult for children to stand on their own. After the child enters the society, the first step is to know how to take care of himself, if he does not even have the simple ability to work, it will make him difficult to move.
2, children are not easy to fit in.
Children who are spoiled from an early age are prone to become unsociable and form a solitary personality due to the constraints and restrictions of their parents. Without communication with friends, children will close their hearts and slowly lose their aura and innocence.
3. Affect the child's personality development.
Parents pay too much attention to their children, which will make children timid, cowardly, and sensitive. In the process of children's growth, if parents do not allow their children to take risks, they will make children become too cautious and dare not make mistakes, and it is easy to develop an inferiority and negative mentality.
02
Learn to let go and cultivate your child's independence
From the time of birth, children have the instinct to protect themselves, and the ability to take care of themselves is constantly accumulating in growth.
Good parents, not all the time to meet all the needs of the child, but when he tries to do what he wants to do, the parents retract their protective hands, a very important performance is: "slow half a beat", to give the child the ability and time to solve problems on their own.
Parents should create opportunities for their children to learn to be independent and give him some free space. Excessive protection is not conducive to the healthy growth of children, but also allows them to develop a dependent mentality. Parents should seize the opportunity to cultivate their children's independence in a timely manner, of course, the process is also to pay attention to the gradual.
Parents should let go appropriately so that children are free to explore and discover the world around them. However, the child's independence can not be cultivated in a day or two, you must give him a certain amount of time and space, and slowly learn how to face things independently.
Of course, to make children independent is not to completely let go. Parents should let their children learn to be independent and build a sense of crisis at the same time, so that children know how to deal with dangers. Parents can properly teach their children some emergency knowledge, which can protect themselves and save people.
It turns out that children who have always needed protection will never really take a step towards independence.
Love too much, too full, pit the child, but also bitter yourself. As a parent, we must avoid overprotecting our children, give him trust and waiting, let them try everything more, and cultivate independence.
Writer Bing Xin once said: "Let children grow freely like weeds." "On the road to children's growth, rather than meticulous care, let him learn to be independent is the most important thing for parents to do!"
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