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Initials
Not all marriages are as perfect as depicted in fairy tales, and if you're dealing with a marriage full of "regrets," do you still have the courage to stick with it?
The marriage of my friend Xiaoqing, living a life, has become a taste...
Although they love each other very much, the "regret" of not having children is like a fish fish stuck in their throats, unable to spit out or swallow...
Meet and love each other, hand in hand and happiness
Xiaoqing and Chengjun met on the university's entrance day.
It was a sunny midsummer day, the sun scorching the earth, the air mixed with the scorching aroma of the steaming plants and the smell of sweat emanating from the crowd. The unfamiliar campus, the chaotic environment and the heavy luggage all made the newcomer Xiaoqing feel deeply dazed. Just when Xiao Qingliu was without a master, a gentle "student sister" came from the back of my head, and in an instant, it opened my heart. Only to see him in a white shirt, smiling slightly, extra gentlemanly, in an instant, her heart was captured by him.
After four years they started a sweet love mode. Although he entered the society a year before her, no matter how busy he was at work, he would find time to come to school with her. And the prophecy that everyone often says, "graduation is lovelessness", does not work at all for them, and their feelings are more and more like glue because of this short separation.
So as soon as Xiaoqing graduated, they entered the marriage hall hand in hand under the witness of relatives and friends.
After marriage, they lived a happy life that everyone envied. He is smart and self-motivated, in order to give Xiaoqing and the future baby a better life, resolutely resigned to start a business with others, the business is booming; and Xiaoqing follows the principle of focusing on the family to find a spare job in the public institution, although the money is not much, but it is good to live less close to home; the in-laws are also kind and enlightened, although they live with them, but in addition to taking care of food and living, basically do not interfere too much in the lives of Xiaoqing and the two.
Everything was so beautiful and smooth. Soon after the marriage, in the eager expectation of the whole family, Xiaoqing finally became pregnant.
At the beginning of the nightmare, the house leaked in the rain
But life is like a wheel, it rumbles on the track of your life, it may be full of happiness, it may be a ruthless crush on you.
For Xiaoqing, this pregnancy is the beginning of a nightmare.
She was diagnosed with an ectopic pregnancy and not only had to terminate the pregnancy immediately, but also had one fallopian tube removed.
Although the operation was successful and Cheng Jun took good care of Xiaoqing around her, she still couldn't stop crying. To this day, I still remember the dazzling lights, pungent smell and cold bed in the operating room that day, because Xiaoqing knew that this time not only took away her baby, but also took away nearly 70% of her natural pregnancy and mother's chance.
Unwillingly, Xiaoqing accepted the doctor's advice and began to try IVF.
Maybe it was heaven jealous of their happiness, or maybe Xiaoqing had used up all the good fortune in this life, and after four consecutive ivy test tube attempts, the result was a failure.
As time went on, she drifted away from the optimal age of childbearing, and her success rate became lower and lower, and Xiaoqing began to feel the pressure from her family after she gradually lost confidence and patience. Although everyone did not say it explicitly, the attitude and eyes were clear and the final verdict had been issued to her: Die, you are doomed to never conceive a child in this life.
Not to mention that these years of trying have almost hollowed out all their savings. Coupled with the impact of the new crown pneumonia epidemic, Xiaoqing's salary has shrunk significantly, and Cheng jun's business has plummeted.
Don't say it's a child, even life is about to become a problem. Although she was reluctant in her heart, she also had to accept the help of her in-laws, and of course, there were white eyes and mockery that came with her.
But what made Xiaoqing most desperate was that she found that Cheng Jun actually had an affair.
Since the failure of the first operation, Xiaoqing has said to Cheng Jun more than once: If you want to divorce, I have no complaints, but he has firmly said every time that in this life, he will determine that Xiaoqing will not divorce her...
Unexpectedly, he said and did a set: Recently, Xiaoqing found that in his mobile phone call records, there were dozens of call records with this person named "Qingmin", and each call time was not short. Whenever the phone rang, he picked up the phone and ran outside to answer it. When she asked who it was, he not only dodged his eyes, but also answered extremely perfunctorily. Now the phone doesn't leave wherever I go, and I don't have a chance to touch it.
Xiao Qing felt the sky collapse at once.
In order to do surgery, she had to take a long vacation every three or five minutes, and the opportunity for promotion was basically hopeless, and the salary was pitifully low. Every time you operate, you have to be pierced with countless needle holes on your body, so that your whole body is swollen and even unable to get to the ground, and the pain of egg retrieval is indescribable; at the same time, psychologically you have to bear the gossip from relatives, the cold eyes of your in-laws, and the fear of the results... All the pain and grievances swept in at once, engulfing Xiao Qing in an instant.
Xiaoqing clearly knows that the core of all problems lies in the child.
He wanted a child and she couldn't give it to him, and she would feel sorry for him. But who told Xiaoqing to love him, she was willing to make concessions for him, as long as they were still living together, even if he had children, even if it was not Xiaoqing's, she had no complaints, but the premise was that he had to tell her generously.
With such a thought, Xiaoqing decided to have a good face-to-face conversation with Cheng Jun, even if it would end in divorce in the end, she also accepted it calmly.
Be open and honest and face it bravely
In the evening, Xiao Qingchengjun came to the restaurant where they often fell in love, and explained the grievances he had suffered in the past few years, the thoughts in his heart, and the questions he had questioned him.
He listened quietly, the expression on his face switching back and forth between doubt, heart-wrenching, shame, and self-blame.
At the end, he sighed a long time and said seriously to Xiao Qing, "Actually, I plan to adopt a child." ”
"And the reason why I haven't told you is that I am still consulting the relevant procedures and procedures for adoption; second, I still need some time to do the ideological work of being a parent; third, I am still a little worried about your reaction and attitude to this matter."
He scratched his head, and suddenly said with some embarrassment: "Because now I really can't believe your thoughts, I admit that life and career have put too much pressure on us in the past few years, and I also know that you are not easy, but I have not had the courage to speak out with you openly and honestly like today, this is my fault, so I am very grateful to you for taking the lead in taking this step." ”
Xiao Qing was shocked by this successive and sudden news, and his heart took turns to surge with shock, chagrin, shame, joy, sweetness, and mixed tastes, and at the same time, tears began to swirl in his eyes without controversy.
He looked at her and quipped, "I originally wanted to tell you after the first two things were done, but I didn't expect to be caught by your wind and shadows and a little cranky, and I was actually put on the hat of a scumbag, heck, but I was wronged..."
He made a grimace, and added with a crying voice: "First of all, the 'Qingmin' who makes you care so much is the lawyer I consulted, and it is a male lawyer, if you don't believe it, you can call to verify Oh..." After saying that, he generously took out his mobile phone for me to check.
Listening, the complicated mood of Xiaoqing's lips opened and closed and opened, back and forth for a long time but could not say a word, and in the end she had to give up, crying silly and sweet with tears and laughing.
Epilogue
In fact, as a word, "marriage" really contains too much, there are responsibilities given to us by life, and there are also happiness and suffering that reality gives us, and the most important thing is the love of both parties. It is sometimes as hard as steel to ride the wind and waves to cut thorns, and sometimes gentle as water can contain each other to fill in the lost. So even if there will be "regrets" in the marriage, why should it be afraid of two people who love each other?
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