Text/Old K
I don't know if you have found that many post-00s around you are self-deprecating as "depressed patients".
The "Report on the Development of China's National Mental Health" released by the Chinese Academy of Sciences last year clearly stated that the detection rate of adolescent depression was as high as 24.6%, which is equivalent to 1 in every 5 children who may be depressed. The Ministry of Education has explicitly included depression screening in the content of students' physical examinations, and paid close attention to students with abnormal examination results.
This data makes many parents not believe, thinking how it is possible, where is there any depression at a young age.
Depressed children are right next to you and me
Last year, a popular science depression documentary was released on CCTV.
The first episode is about adolescent depression, and I was very touched by the experience of Zhong Hua, a high school student in the film.
She is like most of you and me, a well-off family, and her parents have high expectations of her, always hoping that her children will be excellent in everything.
As a result, in this high-expectation environment, she became more and more overwhelmed, and eventually fell into depression, which she described as depressed:
"There are 8 classes a day at school, and I will lie on my desk for 8 classes. When I got home, I lay in bed, sometimes I cried, sometimes I didn't cry, and I lay down for 5 hours. Take a bath or wash your face and brush your teeth, and then continue to lose sleep at night. This state really consumes me. ”
Under such torture, she made the decision to seek her parents' help.
But she didn't know if her parents could really understand herself when she said her pain, but fortunately, although her parents were very surprised, she patiently accepted the depression.
After her parents learned that she was depressed, their first reaction was to stop high expectations and restore a relaxed atmosphere to the family, but they did not expect that this decision saved Zhong Hua.
After Zhong Hua recovered, he revealed that if his parents still treated themselves like they did after knowing that they were depressed, saying that they were pretentious, they would immediately jump from the upper floor.
In fact, many times, a change in parents' attitude can save children with depression, and the truth is that depression never distinguishes between ages, and anyone can be deeply involved in it.
Not everyone with depression is lucky
Compared with the above Story of Zhong Hua, some children are not so lucky.
Station B has a depression short film is very popular, the title of the film is "Under the Lights", borrowing the mouth of a depressed high school girl Junko to express the voice of depressed patients, which has resonated with many people.
The protagonist of the film, Junko, is also a high school student, and another identity is a "senior depressed patient".
In the video, she describes herself as not knowing what the cause of the illness is, but the cause of her bad mood is "poor family relationships, poor relationships, and high school academic pressure", and various factors are superimposed and eventually fall into depression.
The time close to diagnosis was her most difficult time, when she "lost sleep every night and fell asleep until four or five in the morning." I had to get up at 6:30 in the morning to go to school, and when I arrived at school, I lay on my desk in a half-dream daze. ”
Walking to the road did not know to hide from the car, several times almost hit, and then and the teacher asked for help, but the teacher said lightly: "Such a small depression, the playground to run two laps is good."
This sentence deepened her despair, she found that no one around her understood her, she could only save herself, a person ran to the Beijing Sixth Hospital for treatment, diagnosed with depression she and her parents said, but her parents could not believe it, and would not understand her.
At the end of the film, she calls for "mental illness is more of an invisible contest", in this difficult process, patients, doctors, relatives, colleagues, friends, may have a decisive impact, I hope that society will have more understanding of this group, less prejudice.
It is the child who takes the medicine, but it is the family who is sick
Yu Honghua, the former attending physician of Huilongguan in Beijing, wrote a book called "Juvenile Depression", which shared the symptoms, causes, and treatment plans of adolescent depression in the tone of a person who witnessed it.
At present, medicine cannot accurately summarize the accurate causes of adolescent depression, so Yu Honghua summarized 17 family stories in an oral manner to summarize the context of adolescent depression.
From his personal experience of depression stories, Yu Honghua summarized 3 family causes of depression in adolescents:
1. "Chicken baby education" is easy for children to have self-criticism, and self-criticism is one of the important factors leading to depression.
2, parents quarrel, fight, divorce these events are easy for children to blame themselves, thus forming self-blame and self-guilt.
3. Emergencies such as campus bullying and sexual assault can easily destroy children's psychological security.
And these facts have made us see a phenomenon, it is the child who takes medicine, but it is the family who is sick.
Experts in the field of education point out that poverty does not lead to the failure of education, but mental abuse will certainly create a problem for children.
If a family has a problem, then one or more people in the family will present the problem, and the most vulnerable or injured person is often the most vulnerable and helpless member of the family , our children.
Sometimes solving the child's problems alone is not enough to make the child fully recover, and I have seen many adolescent depression patients in my own experience in the hospital to meet the clinical cure standards after hospitalization, but once they return to the family, their emotions are out of control again.
American family therapy theory pays great attention to the family as a unit to solve depression, especially when the child is not yet a minor, sometimes it is impossible to get out of the family environment, and it is often affected by the original family.
The famous psychologist Eriksen has made it clear that from birth to 18 years old, children go through at least 5 different stages of psychological development. Each stage requires a different parenting style.
However, most families' parent-child mode of getting along is basically fixed in the child's childhood, and this "one trick, eat all over the sky" education method is obviously not conducive to the continuous growth of children.
Finally, I conclude by quoting a letter from a child, Yan Yan, to his parents:
I write so much not to make you feel guilty and guilty, but just to make it
You realize that your intentional or unintentional actions will cause me harm,
I hope you can grow with me too.
Having said so much, in fact, we are not throwing the culprit of depression to parents, but to let more parents understand how important their responsibilities and influences are in the process of children's growth, after all, children are in pain, parents are equally uncomfortable, they have not paid attention to it in the past, the so-called ignorant are not guilty, but if there is more and more information at present, they are obviously wrong but unwilling to correct, whether there is some unspeakable.