Recently, some parents have reported that children are particularly domineering and cannot accept sharing with children. Sometimes I would bring some cookies for other children to eat, and he would hold them in his hands and not let go, just wanting to eat themselves. When playing games with children, it is also true that two people are playing with cars, and other children want to play differently, and he does not let them, or he has two cars, let him take one for others to play, he can't.
I believe that many parents have had this doubt, how can children not share it. In fact, the child is not the parent's overbearing, but it is true that he does not know how to share. Sharing is a relatively advanced social skill, and it is not easy for parents to let their children share from the heart. Sharing among children should be sincere, with some kind of social purpose, and our children need to have certain social skills before they can do it.
Before that, parents can do some preparatory work first:
(1) First of all, you need to understand the child. It's also normal for children to be reluctant to share what they love with others. Sometimes parents put themselves in the shoes of others, in fact, what we especially like is not willing to share with others, and we will cry when we are young because we have lost what we love. Therefore, when children do not understand sharing, sharing has no social significance for children, and forced sharing will only trigger negative emotions in children.
(2) Before knowing how to share, there is actually a very important premise. It is whether the child understands the "belonging relationship", understands what is his own, what is his mother's, and what is a child's. Because only by understanding the different belongings, distinguishing our own things from other people's things, can our "sharing" be established----- I am willing to give you my things because I like you. So understanding the "relationship of belonging" is an important step.
(3) Parents should not force their children to share, but respect their children. If the child is playing together, even if the child has other toys, or is not playing with this toy, parents should not make up their own minds and lend the child's toys to others to play without the child's willingness. Because this may be counterproductive, let the child think that other children will rob his things, will be more protective of their own toys, do not like to "share".
(4) To avoid the contradiction that because other children want to share and children do not want to share with each other. Parents can let their children choose at home, which toys, children do not like, can be played by others. When other children want to play, you can give them these toys. This will not leave a bad feeling on the child.
(5) Exchange instead of sharing. Sharing can start with exchange, sometimes children will also like other children's toys, then we can ask children to exchange, but also their own to other children to play, if the child can not accept, it can not play other people's, if accepted, can be exchanged.
(6) The number of items to share is larger, the simplest sharing can start from food, prepare more, so that even if the child shares, he still has it, and will not give the child the illusion that I do not have to others.
Sharing should still be based on the situation that children are voluntary and like, and such sharing is truly meaningful social sharing. Therefore, parents can also find a few fixed playmates for the baby, so that the child and the friend gradually establish a relationship, and sharing between friends is also a happy thing for the child.