According to the "Seeing School Bullying" survey, more than 50% of students have experienced campus bullying.
Pino's mother believes that in the real campus, the proportion of students who have encountered campus bullying is much higher than 50%. The daughter, who is more than 5 years old, is in kindergarten class, and there are often parents who complain that their children are being bullied.
01, the daughter is bullied by classmates, and the mother is intimidated by the other parents
Some time ago, there was a mother in the parent group, and her daughter was bullied by the male classmates in the same class, and after reflecting to the teacher, she did not get effective treatment. So in the parent group, I directly ate the other party's mother.
The mother of the bullied female classmate first suppressed the anger in her heart and asked the parents of the other party whether the teacher explained the situation to him again. After knowing that the teacher did not talk to him.
It directly clarified the facts, which roughly means: your son bullied me and my daughter, I hope you can discipline your son and say thank you.
But the other parent directly and very impolitely intimidated: "What do I have to do, you can be satisfied?" ”
The parents of the bullied girls said bluntly: I hope your son apologizes to my daughter and will not be bullied in the future.
Bullied parents said: "Children are naughty, I can't guarantee that there will be a next time"
The parents of the bullied girls also directly replied: "It doesn't matter, you can't discipline, I will help you discipline", and then, very unhappily ended the conversation.
After reading what the parents of the bullying boys said, Pino's mother could not balance her heart for a long time, her son often bullied people in kindergarten, even the teacher was very embarrassed, these situations she knew.
But he not only did not care about teaching his own children, but also looked arrogant, which caused the parents in the group to be dissatisfied:
Some parents said bluntly: knowing that children are naughty, they don't care about teaching, but they don't dare to guarantee that there is no next time, and they want to beat up with adults when they listen;
There are also parents who "complain": Your son used the tip of the pen last time, facing my daughter's eyes, to have the next time, you will not discipline me for you;
Some parents accuse: What kind of parents are really, what kind of children there are! And Teacher Aite, don't let your daughter and her son be at the same table, a group is not OK.
Looking at the "complaints" of the parents, the bullying parents have not said a word since. Afterwards, some parents put screenshots on the Internet, saw the "cruel words" released by the parents of the bullied girls, netizens shouted directly: "Do a beautiful job, this world, your children do not care about teaching, some people help you discipline."
02, parents, how to educate children to avoid being bullied?
According to relevant surveys, more than 40% of bullied students will completely abandon their studies; more than 25% of students will not come to school in the short term, and few can truly achieve "no impact".
Pino's mother had a classmate who was not tall and thin, and was often bullied by her classmates. And his parents, in the eyes of outsiders, are also timid and cowardly types. In the face of children being bullied, they will always say: Don't go to provoke others, joke with you when others...
His parents' words were very light, but for his classmates at the time, they were very heavy, which made him fall into a deep inferiority and doubt.
After being bullied, he did not know how to resist, and naturally became the target of more classmates being bullied. Because he was often bullied, his academic performance also plummeted, and the whole person was only promised; when he was in the second year of junior high school, he dropped out of school by himself, and then followed his relatives into the factory to work.
Therefore, when the child is bullied, parents must avoid blind tolerance, which not only makes it impossible to protect the child, but also pushes the child to the "abyss". As Teacher Li Meijin said: If you don't tell your child to resist, she/he will be forced to die.
So, how can parents educate their children so that their children can avoid being bullied?
Participate in more physical exercise to make children look "not good"
According to relevant data surveys, in school bullying, those who are thin, shy, and unconfident children are often more likely to be bullied.
Therefore, in Pino's view, whether boys or girls, parents can take their children to participate in various sports, such as running, swimming, taekwondo, basketball, football and so on.
On the one hand, it can promote the physical development of children and cultivate a strong physique; on the other hand, it can practice explosiveness, and children with strong explosive power are generally not easy to be bullied.
The little nephew is 5 years old, more than 1.2 meters tall, in school, and has never heard of being bullied. It's inseparable from the fact that his dad takes him to play soccer every week.
Help your child make more friends
Compared with thin and timid children, isolated and often alone children are more likely to be bullied.
According to the researchers of 208 children who are often bullied, after 2 years of follow-up survey, 72% of them got rid of bullying, the reason is that "making new friends" is the main reason for them to get rid of bullying.
Therefore, for children who are not sociable and timid, parents can invite their children's classmates to play at home, and let the children become "big housekeepers" who are responsible for preparing the children's food and play.
In this way, not only the child's social skills are exercised, but also the friendship may be gained, which is very beneficial for the child.
From an early age, instilled in children the awareness of "anti-bullying"
Many parents may think that my child has not been bullied and does not need to talk about this topic.
However, pre-prevention is always more important than after-the-fact remediation, regardless of whether the child has been bullied now, as a parent, it is the responsibility to tell the child what to do when encountering bullying:
When you are ridiculed by your classmates, should you open your mouth to fight back, or do you suffer in silence?
When a classmate is bullied, should they "fight back" or tell their parents and teachers?
When classmates are nicknamed, should they ignore them, or should they prove their innocence?
Studies have found that when children clash with their classmates, 50% of children do not know how to deal with it! Therefore, it is necessary for parents to teach their children how to cope in advance, so that their classmates know that they are "not good".
If you have a 3-8-year-old child, Pino's mother suggests that you accompany your child to see this set of "Learn to Say No" picture book, which contains 8 common scenes of school bullying such as shoving, snatching, and ridicule, so that children can find solutions to various conflicts in one interesting story after another.
Only when the child is well aware, can he make the right response when he really faces bullying, exclusion, pushing and shoving, etc., and know what he should do, can he make the other party stop hurting.
This set of 8 picture books, each book is very practical, and all are equipped with audio, busy during the day, parents, as a sleep story, listen to it with their children, let the child know what to do when they are bullied.
After all, prevention beforehand is far more important than making up for it afterwards, and few children who encounter school bullying are not harmed.