Author | Yungu Zen Master Source | Daywalker One Good Repair Platform (ID: RXYSGXPT)
Ending Song: Jar - Say goodbye to you at the end of September
There is always such a strange phenomenon in the world: polite and tolerant to outsiders, but harsh and irritable to relatives.
As a result, there was constant family strife, quarrels, and anger.
Why is that?
In fact, the reason behind it is very simple, but it is very heartfelt.
Because someone is pampered, it is unscrupulous
As the saying goes: "The void can contain the sun, moon, stars, and the earth, mountains, and rivers." ”
The void can contain all things, so the vastness is integrated.
The reason why a person is always unscrupulous is because there are relatives who are as tolerant as the void.
In "The Siege", Qian Zhongshu once wrote such a plot:
After Fang Hong gradually married Sun Roujia, the pressure of life ensued, so both of them chose to vent their grievances on each other.
In this regard, Fang Hong gradually said triumphantly: In the past, when I was aggrieved and angry, I could only suffocate in my heart, and no one was my punching bag. Now, it's better to lose your temper with anyone than to lose your temper with your wife! So, why do we unconsciously choose to lose our temper with our loved ones when we are stressed?
There is a concept in psychology called "regression", which means that when you encounter setbacks, you will degenerate to the way you face setbacks and stress as a child.
At this time, you will expose your true nature in front of the people closest to you.
Because you know that if you scold an outsider, they will leave you and will hurt you. But your loved ones are safe, and if you are angry with them, you will be forgiven; if you are angry with them, you will certainly be cared for.
Therefore, you will always be angry with outsiders and in front of your relatives, do whatever you want.
The care and cherishing of your loved ones lets you know that whatever you do will be forgiven.
But home is a place of love, not a shelter for bad emotions.
Don't leave it to your family, your worst temper.
No matter how close you are, you will be disappointed and cold
There is a saying: "Parents and wives live together for karma, for example, when a guest starts to be separated." ”
The privilege of being a loved one in this life is the guidance of fate.
The fate is shallow and easy to disperse, the fate is deep to be cherished, and the people who are close to each other will not be grateful and cherished, and they will also be disappointed and cold.
The writer Hemingway was well-known, but his family was unhappy.
Hemingway went through four marriages in his lifetime, and his second wife admired him and bore him two children.
But Hemingway not only never cared about caring for his wife, but was tired of the noise in the house, so he often left his weak wife at home and went out hunting alone.
The husband's indifference again and again finally disappointed his wife and chilled, and he hastily ended in divorce.
The selfish and grumpy Hemingway not only led to his unhappy marriage, but also to his life was unsatisfactory, and eventually committed suicide due to severe depression.
Although the family is a relationship of sharing hardships and hardships, and sharing weal and woe, it is not that it is not necessary to respect and take care of them.
The family's relationship should be close and measured, and it should not be unscrupulous because of who you are close to.
The Heart Sutra tells us, "The mind has no hindrances, no fears." ”
All you can hurt is the person who loves you the most.
Your temper anytime, anywhere, is a harm to your loved ones. Once the wound is left, no amount of compensation can cover up the scar.
The cracks between people often start with bad emotions.
Whether you are a lover or a loved one, please do not hurt because you are close.
Relatives, not our pump, learn to be considerate and respectful, the family can be happy and harmonious, and the water will flow for a long time.
The greatest upbringing of a person is to be pleasant to his family and face
Jing Yun: "If you hate love, you can't attain the Fa." ”
Only when one lets go of one's hatred and love can one stay away from troubles.
When you are happy with your family and face, your life will be smooth.
A successful businessman, in the early days of entrepreneurship, is heavily in debt.
Those difficult days made her collapse several times.
But whenever she came home late at night, she would always stand under a plane tree before entering the door to rest.
Then face the plane tree, pour out her pain and troubles of the day, and when she is in a good mood, she will happily push open the door of the house, leaving the family with a harmony and peace.
Today, this businessman who has traveled to Beijing alone has successfully created hundreds of millions of assets and become a famous female entrepreneur, she is the host Li Jing.
Enter the door in a different way, throw away the temper, and change the fate.
The attitude towards family members hides a person's future.
If there is a slight unhappiness, they will complain about their families, and their lives must be unhappy. On the contrary, when a person is willful and kind to his family, his life is happy, and his life is naturally smooth.
The ancients said: "Where the heart is quiet, the gods are happy, and the gods are happy." ”
A harmonious family is the easiest to be blessed.
When you learn to treat outsiders with kindness and patience, and put some on your family, you will find that there are fewer and fewer troubles, more happiness, and more and more possessions.
Bringing good emotions to relatives is the most advanced cultivation of a person.
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As the old saying goes: When the origin is gathered, the fate is scattered.
The encounter between man and man is a fate.
In this world, you meet many people, but there are only a few people who can tolerate you, except for your family.
The closest to you is your family; the one who loves you the most is also your family.
If you are lucky enough to meet, please cherish it.
Treat your family, be more considerate, more understanding, more calm, suppress your temper, and think about your family's difficulties.
Know how to cherish, the family can be happy and long-lasting; learn to be grateful, life can be smooth!
Click [in the watch], may you and I all complain less about the family, more satisfied. Believe that your kind face will be exchanged for the blessings of a family!
About the author: Yungu Zen Master, this article was first published on the Daily Action One Good Practice Platform (ID: RXYSGXPT), a day of one good, a year of three hundred good deeds, accumulate goodness into virtue, change fate.
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