Hello everyone, I take the time out of my busy schedule today to bring you the following article, welcome to taste it together!
Today's social progress is very fast, people's minds have also opened up a lot, everyone will have their own unique personality, for individual differences have also learned to respect each other, never forced.
However, for some basic character of men, it is still necessary to have, such as responsibility, responsibility, ability and morality, etc., of which manhood is very popular. Many parents of boys know from an early age that they train boys to become a manly person.
Lack of masculinity, all mother's pot
The influence of a family on the child's childhood cannot be ignored, the father and mother in the family are the main members, all their behaviors will affect the child, and some children grow up with character defects and the daily life of the family are inseparable, especially manhood.
Xiao Feng is a very strong person, and her husband is introduced to each other, and her husband's personality is relatively weak, so the two can be regarded as a one-shot, after marriage, the two will have a child. Because the birth is a son, Xiao Feng does not consider the matter of having a second child, and the husband has no opinion at all, so the son has become their only child, a special baby. As long as the son wants to eat, the mother will buy it for the son to eat, because the snack is too much, and the result is that the nine-year-old son, compared with other children of the same age, looks particularly thin, which has become the main reason why the son is often bullied at school.
Every time the son is bullied, he goes home to find Xiao Feng to cry, Xiao Feng's personality is more violent, as soon as he hears that his son is being bullied, his temper will come up, and he can't help but run directly to the school to find the teacher, and the parents of the students, the teacher has also mediated a lot of disputes, all the students in the class know that he has such a strong mother, although he is not bullied, but few students are willing to talk to Xiao Feng. The son felt particularly lonely at school, and after telling his mother about it, the mother decided to transfer to her son.
In this way, after the transfer, the situation was indeed much better, because as soon as he arrived at the school, Xiao Feng greeted the teacher, and the teacher paid more attention to the situation after understanding the situation.
Years later, when the son came to talk about marriage and marriage, he always couldn't talk about the object, some talked for a few days and then separated, some went out to play once and came back, went on a blind date more than a dozen times, and did not succeed once. Xiao Feng looked at his son and felt that it was not ugly, how to get along and divide it, so he went to ask the matchmaker.
The matchmaker said: "The girl thinks that your boy is too unmasculine, there is no opinion, go out to play, ask him where to go, he said casually, completely passive, and it is not decisive to do things." After all, the little girl now still likes to be some decisive person in life, otherwise, how to live in the future, and like your son, I still need others to protect, so for the time being, I can't find the right one. ”
In fact, the boys raised by these kinds of mothers are easy to be unmasculine
The masculinity of boys is generally cultivated in childhood, and this temperament and family relations are inseparable, especially with the mother, and the boys raised by these three mothers are most likely to have no manhood.
1, too strong, even familial female strength
In the past society, the status of women was very low, and most women hovered between the family, children and husbands. Nowadays, the status of women has been greatly improved, but some women are beyond the normal strength, occupying an important position in the family, which is beyond men and beyond the general relationship between husband and wife.
And the children raised by this kind of family will not be manly, because the mother controls all things, and the child must listen to the mother. In the process of growing up, children will inevitably not have any subjective opinions of their own, and they are mainly based on mothers, and the influence of long-term family behaviors has led to this kind of men being unable to take the initiative to express their own views in front of women.
2. Always belittle the father of the child
Women who are more strong in family life will generally have more advantages than men in work, and this advantage is very easy to cause women to be inferior to men, the father's family status is low, the mother looks down on the father, often belittling the father in front of the child, at this time, the child sees the father's position in the family, some of the father's tolerance, the child gradually under this environmental influence, the status of the man is confirmed, thus losing the man's due temperament.
3. Discipline is too strict
Mothers are very loving to their children, and this kind of love is sometimes irrational, but it limits the child. The mother is afraid that the child will go the wrong way, so everything helps the child decide, feel that what the child does, should be reported to the mother, the mother agrees to it, the child is too strict, but the child loses the independence and arrogance that a man should have.
To cultivate boy masculinity, mothers should do the same
Boys must have masculinity, which is a characteristic of boys, and many mothers want to raise their children to be a manly person. But many people are not doing a good job, and the right thing to do should be this.
1. When the child has negative emotions such as anger, do not suppress it and let the child vent
In the process of growing up, it is very normal for children to have negative emotions, and when facing children's negative emotions, mothers should learn not to suppress children, let children vent out, and after children vent their emotions, then analyze children's things, understand children's ideas, and finally guide children. Instead of asking the child to be a person who doesn't lose his temper and has no thoughts.
2, let the boys learn to respect women from elementary school, rather than blindly let go
Male symbolizes bravery, strength and strength. So it's important for boys to learn to protect and respect women from an early age. But not everything to let women, must have their own bottom line, not to be a slave to women, but an equal life, can be tolerated in some small things in life, but not without a bottom line of tolerance.
3. Maintain the image of the father
The position and image of the father in the family is very important, which determines the boy's first impression of the male status in the family. If the image of the father is established well, then in the future, the child will do even better than the father in the family and become the responsibility in the family. On the contrary, if the mother is too strong, the father is always very weak, and under the influence of such an environment, the child cannot really become the pillar of a family. Therefore, there will always be a lack of courage that some men should have.
To cultivate masculinity, we must pay attention to these points
Cultivating children's masculinity is actually not so simple, mothers use a slightly wrong way, will let children go to the other extreme, so when cultivating masculinity, mothers must pay attention to these two points
1、? You can't blindly make your child strong
In the eyes of some parents, boys should have the appearance of boys, can not be a little wronged to cry and cry, to learn to be strong, after all, the future of the ups and downs are still a lot. In fact, this idea is not wrong, but the mother ignores the love for the boy in this process, the boy also needs love when he is young, if the child falls, blindly let the child not cry, get up by himself, the mother does not even have a loving hug after the child gets up. So when they grow up, such children will think that they are manly, all things should be carried by themselves, even if they are wronged, they should be held back, they should bear it alone, and the negative emotional backlog will affect their physical and mental health.
2. Be careful to cultivate masculinity into machismo
Masculinity is not machismo, the difference between the former being popular with women in the family and the latter being detrimental to the harmonious relationship of the family. Machismo wants to be his own master in everything, arrogant, and disrespectful of women, solipsism, which is very detrimental to the peaceful coexistence between men and women, and once cultivated, it is difficult to change.
Educating children is not an easy thing, it requires the joint efforts of the family, society, and the school, and the influence of parents in this process is very significant, any behavior may affect the growth of children, imprison the child's thoughts, so if you want to cultivate the spirit of boys, mothers must play their own role, maintain the image of the father, set a good example for the child, so that the child will become an independent personality and masculine after he grows up