A woman ate noodles at guangxi railway station, and when checking out, she found that a bowl of noodles cost 1,000 yuan, so the woman did not hesitate to call the police, and after calling the police, she found that the bowl of noodles was really worth 1,000

A woman ate noodles at the Guangxi Railway Station, and when she checked out, she found that a bowl of noodles cost 1,000 yuan, so the woman did not hesitate to call the police, and after calling the police, she found that the bowl of noodles was really worth 1,000 yuan. It turned out that the owner had found that when a man and a woman were eating noodles, the man's look was not quite right, so he asked for 1,000 yuan a bowl of noodles, which was expensive, and the woman certainly couldn't bear to call the police. As a result, the man listened. Frightened, he immediately ran away. Because he is engaged in pyramid schemes. In this way, women will avoid being deceived by pyramid schemes.

2 The abbot earned 30 million a year, so he went to the Maybach 4s store, intending to withdraw a Maybach s900 in full. While the formalities were in place, the abbot waited to be bored and smoked a Cuban cigar. The sales manager of the 4s store came over to the abbot and said, "Sir, smoking is not allowed here." The abbot quickly stood up and took two steps forward, asking, "What about here?" Sales Manager: "Neither can I." The abbot took a few more steps and asked, "Is this okay?" Sales Manager: "Still not." The abbot walked to the door of the 4s shop: "Is it okay here?" The sales manager was angry: "You are all finished smoking and ask me what I do!" ”

3 Like my female neighbor for a long time, has been embarrassed to confess. Today my home network is broken, and I used the master key to crack the WiFi password of her home, and the password turned out to be the pinyin of "I love Dazhi". My nickname is Dazhi! The thought of the beautiful face of my neighbor made my heart flutter. At night, after work, I met her, so I asked her: "I know your WiFi password, my nickname is Dazhi, do you like me?" The girl blushed and said apologetically, "I'm really sorry, my family's Erha is also called Dazhi!" "I:" ........."

4 The husband forced his father-in-law to ask for money to buy a car, and finally the father-in-law gave his husband 500,000 yuan. My father-in-law immediately went to buy a BMW 525 and asked me to take my driver's license. I disagreed, he advised me: take a driver's license for me to deduct points! Then I obediently went to the test, and after getting the driver's license, my husband said: You don't drive, the driver's license is not a white test, and you are not afraid to drive skillfully. I obediently drove up the street to hang out, and now, my husband advised me: You still don't drive, the driver's licenses of your relatives are about to be deducted by you alone, you go out or take a taxi! This time I'm going to make my own decisions.

5 Go on a blind date specifically change your clothes, meet at Starbucks, and briefly introduce yourself. But we both felt that the other was not suitable, so we planned to leave. Before leaving, the sister waved her fist and said, "Brother, goodbye jianghu!" After two hours, I knocked on her door with her favorite yellow braised chicken rice and milk tea: "Hello, the takeaway you ordered has arrived!" ”

6 The buddy's wife hated him for being too weak and abandoned him to get along with a 20-year-old young muscular man. The buddy borrowed alcohol all day to dispel his sorrows, and the alcohol addiction became very large, but since I helped her run errands to buy alcohol, the buddy actually gave up drinking directly. On this day, the brother bought three bottles of Maotai and came to my house happily to thank you. Surprised, I asked, "I also take your money to do things for you, what is there to thank?" The buddy said with a serious face, "Of course I want to thank you!" If you hadn't gradually mixed water into my wine over the past few years, how could I quit drinking now? Now, I can drink a glass of water at home and get over the addiction! ”

7 I was in junior high school at an aristocratic school when I saw a black man asking the doorman for directions one day. The black foreigner said a stiff Chinese while drawing with his hand. But the doorman uncle did not understand what it meant for half a day. Just as I was about to show off my English skills, the doorman said in fluent English: Can you speak English? I understand！

8 The college entrance examination played very stable, admitted to a 211 college in Shanghai, when the admission letter came down, the mother was happy to have not slept all night. I was also very excited in my heart, and quickly hit a few LOLs to calm this excitement. Suddenly my mom asked me, "Why don't you go on a date on the weekend?" I looked ugly and said, "No woman likes me!" The mother comforted: "If there is a woman who likes you, what are you willing to do for her?" Without hesitation, I shouted, "Nothing! The old mother smiled and said, "Son, your mother likes you, you go and help your mother wash the dishes!" ”

9 Yesterday I went shopping with my wife and met my first love who had dumped me before.

The first love said ostentatiously: I am married, what about you? Presumably still alone, right? I looked at my wife with a distressed look, who expected her to understand in seconds.

My wife hugged me and spoiled, honey, people want to buy that global limited edition bag! Isn't that nice! Haha, only to see the face of the first love quickly darkened.

10 The boyfriend is the second generation of the rich, he likes to take me on a tour, and we went to the Maldives on May Day. I took a lot of pictures and sent them to my mom. After my mother read it, she replied to me: How do you take this picture like a woman, it's so ugly! Me: My dear mother, first, your daughter is more than thirty years old, originally a woman, second, can not blame the photo, mainly genetic problems, the mother is ugly, the girl can be beautiful. Mom...... 

 #年度搞笑名场面 #