I believe that many parents have had such an experience that the child promised a thing, but in the end we found that in fact, he did not really do it, for example: the child promised to watch an episode of cartoons every day after school to write homework, but there will always be time after the time to play and want to watch more, after each commitment will not count, no matter how good the guarantee was, but in the end there will still be bargaining.
The vast majority of children's estimates of their own abilities are completely inaccurate, and the agreement that was promised at the beginning may only be that the child himself feels that he can do it, and as a parent, do not tempt the child to make a commitment because he agrees.
Like "today to eat two bowls of rice", "just play with the phone for a while" and so on, even if the child takes the initiative to say such a thing, as a parent can not really believe it.
We are not three-year-olds, and the request you make, the child says "OK", is it really credible? He "should" not "be able to do it?" Obviously not, there are no such good parents under the sky.
As parents, we should not just stare at whether our children keep their promises, but should teach them how to keep their promises.
Let's take the example of our most common play cell phone: when we are immersed in a movie or a game, we are mentally in another world.
The light, sound, and images of the screen are hypnotic to our brains, and at times like this, our brains secrete more dopamine, a neurotransmitter that relieves stress and brings pleasure.
More dopamine will make people feel good and become lazy, so the child will not want to do anything else, which is a very normal thing.
Moreover, when the child is immersed in the world of cartoons and suddenly and forcibly turns off the TV, the child will feel a sense of impact similar to physical pain, resulting in emotional screaming and crying.
If we take a different approach, at the end of an episode, take the time to sit next to the child, enter his world, talk to the child about the plot, establish communication with the child, and help the child "return" from another world.
This way allows children to feel the attention of their parents and even turn off the TV themselves
Let go of the phone.
As a parent, instead of pestering whether your child can do it or keep the promises they make, think differently:
"How can I help my child so that I can keep my promise more smoothly?"
The ultimate purpose of discipline is to help children master the necessary skills, rather than waiting for the results after preaching.