Chen Ping
01
At the end of Qin, there was a rich man named Zhang Negative.
The old man struggled all his life in exchange for a house full of gold and silver now, and it is reasonable to say that he should be able to enjoy the blessings.
But Lao Zhang had a troublesome thing that he couldn't put down no matter what, that is, his granddaughter.
It wasn't that he didn't like this granddaughter, on the contrary, Lao Zhang broke his heart for this granddaughter.
She found five husbands in a row, but all five men died after marriage.
Lao Zhang wondered in his heart: Is Lady Nitter made of steel? Life is also hard, right? Who will dare to ask you after this?
As soon as she heard that it was the Zhang family's handmaiden, she turned around and left, and no one took the order at all.
What to do?
Only Lao Zhang personally went out on horseback, where there are large-scale activities for the opening of wedding and funeral shops, Lao Zhang has to go to great lengths to participate.
The purpose is one, to find a man for his granddaughter.
02
The Emperor did not pay off, and finally at a funeral, Lao Zhang found a target.
This guy is called Chen Ping, he looks very handsome, and he is still a single dog when he inquires.
So after the end of the activity, Lao Zhangwei followed Chen Ping to his home.
Seeing everything in front of him, Lao Zhang inhaled a cool breath:
Is this where people live? Too poor, right?
Thatched house you thatched house, not even a door, directly hung a broken mat to work.
What's even more disturbing is that Chen Ping, a guy in his twenties, still lives with his brother, and he has never touched a hoe in the dozens of acres of land at home.
Farm work? Work?
Not possible in this lifetime.
If it is an ordinary person who sees this look, it is estimated that he will turn his head and leave.
But Lao Zhang is Lao Zhang, and his vision is quite poisonous.
At a glance, he could see that there were many ruts in front of Chen Ping's house.
At this moment, old Zhang Holmes possessed: although Chen Ping was a poor egg, he was not an ordinary poor egg.
Quite simply, how can a poor egg have so many people driving small cars to play with him?
How can a man who can often be with someone who drives a car be a poor egg all his life?
Lao Zhang decided at that time: This boy is my granddaughter and son-in-law.
03
However, as soon as this decision was proposed at the family meeting, it was met with collective opposition:
Man, are you confused? Chen Ping, a famous slacker in a radius of tens of miles, a poor person can pull down the GDP of the whole county, you are pushing our girlfriend into the fire pit.
But Lao Zhang didn't care so much, he believed that Chen Ping would definitely be able to get ahead.
So at Lao Zhang's insistence, a poverty alleviation object that was unreliable in the eyes of others was combined with a well-known broom star.
It was also strange that Chen Ping did not stretch his legs and stare like his predecessors before him, but became stronger and stronger.
Anyway, the old man's family had money, and Chen Ping even threw off his arms and ran wildly on the idle slippery road.
Nothing is to drink tea and play cards and make friends to brag.
"The road is getting wider and wider"
Once, the neighborhood committee held a party to divide the meat for the residents of the community, but usually everyone has to be busy with farm work.
As a result, this task fell to Chen Ping's shoulders.
Chen Ping also did not live up to expectations, using a skillful knife technique, quickly and accurately delivered a pile of meat to the hands of each head of household fairly.
Everyone applauded Chen Ping one after another: Can't you see that your boy still has this hand?
Chen Ping modestly waved his hand: What is this? If one day I were to rule the world, ahem.
"Let the peace be slaughtered in the world, just as meat is also."
The meat sharing incident made Chen Ping's confidence soar, and gradually, he was no longer satisfied with the trivial matters of dividing meat and mediating neighborhood disputes:
A big man who mixes with this gang of old ladies all day has a fart future, and my dream is the sea of stars.
Therefore, Chen Ping picked up his bag and set off for the outside world.
04
Chen Ping's first stop when he went out to work was to defect to King Wei.
But not long after, Chen Ping found out that Wei Wang was a stupid X boss.
The more valuable advice he gave him, the more he didn't take it.
There is a fart future with such a boss.
As a result, Chen Ping jumped to the Dachu Group, which was the most powerful and promising at that time.
The head of the Dachu Group at that time was the overlord Xiang Yu.
However, soon, Chen Ping found that although Xiang Yu was very capable, he was too emotional and very difficult to get along with.
As a result, Chen Ping could only continue to look for his next home.
This time, Chen Ping was targeting Liu Bang's startup.
Liu
Liu Bang was very excited after reading Chen Ping's resume:
This is too similar to my experience, right?
I am a poor peasant, you are poor; my famous saying of the year was "As the great husband should be", and the slogan of your little boy was "Let the peace be slaughtered in the world, and it is like meat." It seems that we are destined to be together.
In this way, these two middle-aged men hit it off.
05
Watching his boss tilt the balance of his feelings towards Chen Ping, some of the small friends who had been following Liu Bang began to be jealous.
A black history called DouBab who began to frantically pick chen ping gave Liu Bang a small report:
Chen Ping is not a good bird, you don't take it too seriously, be careful of injuries.
Liu Bang said: Speaking has a basis.
It is said that Chen Ping and his sister-in-law have a leg, and this man is not firm in his revolutionary stance and is constantly changing jobs, so why can you guarantee that he will be loyal; what is even more infuriating is that he also takes bribes from his subordinates, and is a faceless embezzler.
"Chen Ping, The Marquis of Qi, the Infant, and other salty slanders: When ChenWenping was at home, he stole his sister-in-law; Chenwenping received the gold of the generals, and those who had more gold were given good, and those who had less gold were punished with evil. So the King of Han was suspicious. ”
Liu Bang summoned Chen Ping: I don't care what happened to you and your sister-in-law, and I didn't ask you what happened in other companies before, but I have to explain your corruption and bribery.
Chen Ping said: Boss, let me tell you a true story.
Liu Bang agreed.
Chen Ping then began the "performance" with a handful of snot and a handful of tears: When I came to our company for an interview, I came by boat. I didn't expect to meet a black-hearted boatman who wanted to clean me up. In order to convince him that I was a poor egg, I stripped naked and went to help him row the boat.
You say, I'm so poor, can I survive without corruption? Don't my wife and dolls eat?
Liu Bang was silent, waved his hand to let Chen Ping go, and never said anything again.
06
In May 203 BC, Liu Bang was besieged by Xiang Yu in Xingyang, and he was about to burp.
Chen Ping gave Liu Bang an idea: "Ask the Great King to write a fraudulent letter to the Overlord, asking him to meet at the East Gate." We will find a way to lure his Chu army at the western, northern, and southern gates to the east gate, so that the king can rush out through the west gate. ”
Liu Bang agreed.
After a while, Chen Ping led the general Ji Xin, who looked very similar to Liu Bang, to see Liu Bang and said, "Disguise him as the king of Han and go out to deceive and surrender, so as to buy time for the king." ”
The next day, before dawn, the Han army opened the East Gate, and Chen Ping sent two thousand maidens out of the East Gate one by one.
As soon as the Chu soldiers at the south, west, and north gates heard that the east gate was full of beautiful women, they rushed to the east gate and snatched the beautiful women.
Immediately after that, Ji Xin disguised himself as Liu Bang and landed on Xiang Yu in the Han King's car.
The besieging Chu army rushed to the east city to see Liu Bang come out and land, and the sound of long live was higher than a wave, and xingyang's siege of the city was relaxed.
Liu Bang also took this opportunity to escape from the West Gate in the dark.
As for the 2,000 maidens and Ji Xin, there was no doubt that they had become the ghosts under the Chu army's sword.
The Han army went on hunger strike, and more than 2,000 people came out of the east gate of the woman at night, and was attacked by Jia and Chu Yin on all sides. The general Ji Xin was driven by the king, deceived as the king of Han, And Chu, Chu all called long live, the city of Dongguan, so that the king of Han had to ride out of the West Gate with dozens of people.
There are only a few words in the history books about Chen Ping's strategy, but it does not affect the viciousness of this strategy in the slightest.
07
In 195 BC, Liu Bang was about to choke.
But as the owner of a large company, it is not so easy to leave the world quietly.
Someone said to Liu Bang: Boss, when you die, Fan Yu is estimated to kill your most beloved son, Liu Ruyi, because he is wearing a pair of pants with Lü Hou.
At this time, Fan Duo was fighting with the rebellious Yan king Lu Zhuo, who would have thought that there was even someone stabbing a knife in the back?
Liu Bang was very angry when he heard this little report: Chen Ping, you go with Zhou Bo, take back Fan Duo's military power, and then bring his head back.
After receiving this task, Chen Ping began to make small calculations in his mind again:
Is it really going to kill Fan Duo? His wife is Lü Hou's sister Xu (xu), in other words, Fan Duo and the boss are actually concubines.
I'm going to really kill Fan Huo, and even if the boss doesn't say anything after I come back, Lu Hou is not allowed to fight with me?
Zhou Bo
So on the way, Chen Ping told Zhou Bo: Fan Duo is an old man who started a business with his boss from the beginning, ranked high among the heroes, and is a relative. Now, the boss wants to kill him on a whim, but what if he repeatedly repents?
Zhou Bo was a rough man from a war, and if there were so many flowers and intestines, he asked Chen Ping:
So what do you mean? The task given by the boss can't be completed, and we can't make a difference.
Chen Ping said: You listen to me, after we go, we will arrest Fan Huo, and then send it to the boss, so that the boss can handle it himself, okay?
Zhou Bo nodded in agreement.
So the two of them took Fan Huan, turned their heads and walked towards Chang'an.
But as soon as I got halfway to the road, I heard the news of the boss's death.
Chen Ping's heart tightened: Finish the calf, once the boss dies, I don't even have a patron, and it will definitely be Lü Hou who holds the power in the future, Lü Wei doesn't know now that Fan Duo is actually not dead, if she goes to her sister now to sue me, saying that I killed Fan Duo, how many heads do I have enough to cut off the woman after Lü Hou?
It was immediately decided to let his men slowly walk in the prison cart and hurry back to Chang'an to explain the matter to Lü Hou.
08
But Chen Ping had not yet returned to Chang'an, and another notice had come, asking him to rush to Xingyang to guard Xingyang with the irrigation baby.
It is estimated that this order was issued by Liu Bang before he swallowed his breath, and Liu Bang also knew that after he died, Lü Hou would definitely not let Chen Ping go, so he sent Chen Ping to Xingyang.
After all, if he had an army in his hands, Lü Hou would have to weigh it even if he wanted to attack Chen Ping.
But Chen Ping did not follow the boss's will, but quickly rushed to Chang'an City:
Big brother, you are already dead, you can't cover me in the future, Lu Hou wants to kill me in minutes, I must now hold this woman's thighs.
After seeing Lü Hou, Chen Ping cried a lot, expressed his sadness and regret that he did not see the last side of his eldest brother, and then reported the results of his treatment of Fan Duo.
Lü Hou was very happy: you are still very beautiful in this matter, and you will perform well in the future, and the sister-in-law will have a number in mind and will not treat you badly.
Lu Hou
Chen Ping then made a request: The eldest brother asked me to go to Xingyang, but I didn't want to go, so let me bring someone to guard the inner palace.
Lü Hou said: "Well, from now on, you will be Lang Zhongling, responsible for the safety of the inner palace, and be my son's teacher, and tutor him well."
In this way, Chen Ping became a taifu. 、
To tell the truth, did Liu Bang really want to kill Fan Duo because he believed the small report of others?
not necessarily.
It is very likely that Liu Bang knows that his son Liu Ying is an honest baby, and even if he comes to power in the future, he may not be able to shake the stage, or rely on his mother Lu Lu.
What kind of woman is Lu Yan?
That was strong and habitual, and later she overthrew the emperor, plus Fan Duo was her brother-in-law, who controlled the army in her hands, and the Lü clan's foreign relatives wanted to set off some waves, was it not easy?
If the jiangshan I have worked so hard to build falls into the hands of the surname Lu, why shouldn't I do it in vain?
Therefore, first kill Fan Huan and cut off one of Lü Hou's arms.
However, Liu Bang thought that his younger brother Chen Ping was so undisciplined, and at the last moment he betrayed himself, released Fan Duo, and turned his head to lü Hou.
09
Since then, Chen Ping has been mixed up.
In the sixth year of Emperor Hui of Han, Xiangguo Cao Shan died, Wang Ling was promoted to right chancellor, and Chen Ping became the left chancellor.
After another two years, Lü Hou wanted to make the Lü clan king, but Wang Ling said no.
But Chen Ping said: Now that you have great power, you can do whatever you want, so why ask others for their opinions?
Lü Hou was thus particularly dissatisfied with Wang Ling, and made him a taifu and Sheng Chen Ping as a right chancellor.
At this point, Chen Ping has reached the peak of his life.
When you get here, if you think that Chen Ping has only been the leader of the Lü clan since then, then you are underestimating Chen Ping.
10
Once, After Lü held a cocktail party, many people with the surname Liu and the surname Lü were present.
Lü Hou asked Liu Zhang (Liu Bang's grandson) to be a wine supervisor, and Liu Zhang said: Since I am allowed to be a wine supervisor, I must act in accordance with military law.
Lü Hou said yes.
When he was happy to drink, one of the surnames Lu estimated that he could not drink anymore and quietly slipped away.
Liu Zhang chased after him without saying anything, pulled out his sword and hacked the cargo to death.
Liu Zhang
This incident seems to be a very accidental event, but the impact is very large.
When Liu Zhang saw that Liu Zhang dared to do everything, they slowly moved closer to Liu Zhang, and the ministers of the court also saw that Liu Zhang was more fierce, and began to look at him differently.
In this way, the power of the surname Liu gradually became stronger.
Chen Ping was keenly aware of this change, he knew that the madness of the surname Lü would not be long, if he still followed Lü Hou's ass, waiting until the day when the surname Lü fell, that is, his own death date.
Now you have to think about how to play chess yourself.
How can I go?
Of course, after betraying Lü again like he sold his eldest brother Liu Bang, he threw himself into the arms of liu!
Of course, if you want to overthrow the surname Lu, it is not enough to expect yourself alone, and you must find a helper.
So Chen Ping set his sights on Zhou Bo again.
If he wanted to win over his allies, he had to bleed, and Chen Ping suddenly gave Zhou Bo 500 large gold bars as a birthday gift, and made a grand birthday for Zhou Bo.
When Zhou Bo saw this scene, he immediately patted his chest to ensure:
Old Chen, there is something you talk about.
In this way, Zhou Bo became Chen Ping's thug.
In 180 BC, Lü Hou died.
Chen Ping and Zhou Bo joined forces to kill the entire Lü clan with lightning speed, and Liu Heng, the emperor, ascended the throne as Emperor Wen of Han.
Emperor Wen of Han
11
After Liu Heng came to power, Chen Ping, who was bent on climbing up, suddenly proposed to retire and let Zhou Bolai replace himself as the right minister.
This is a bit weird, this is not like Chen Ping's style?
In fact, Chen Ping's move is called retreating to advance.
Zhou Bo was a soldier, and he really couldn't do anything about how to govern the country.
Several times Liu Heng asked Zhou Bo a few administrative questions, and Zhou Bo was sweating.
But when I asked Chen Ping, I answered like a stream.
So Zhou Bo had to call the resignation report: let Old Chen do it, I can just give it a hand.
I have to say that Chen Ping's heart is too deep and too chicken thief.
Maybe you will say that people like Chen Ping are too sinister and cunning, but have there been fewer such people since ancient times?
What they always follow is: where there is interest, choose where to go.
For the sake of profit, what loyalty, morality, all side by side.
Are such people terrible?
Terrible, terrible.
But this is actually human nature.
In the history, Chen Ping's last words are a summary of his own life.
Chen Pingyue: "I have many conspiracies, which is forbidden by the Taoists." My world is ruined, and it is over, and it will never be able to rise again, and I will have many evils. "
Chen Ping also knew that in his life, he had done too many immoral things.