What will polygamy cause in Tajikistan?
On August 25 this year, Medina, a 32-year-old female resident of Dushanbe City, disappeared for no reason and was found a few hours later, with serious injuries and unconscious after being taken to the hospital. According to the preliminary investigation, Medina was abused by her husband, Davlatov's "eldest wife", Aziza. However, the suspect Aziza was acquitted in the subsequent Independence Day amnesty, which caused a public uproar.
The case was then personally supervised by Rustam, the mayor of Dushanbe and the son of the President, and discussed at a working meeting in which the President attended. On December 14, Davlatov was sentenced to 8 years in prison for domestic violence, polygamy and other crimes, and was eventually sentenced to 5 years in prison and 4 years in re-education through labor for amnesty. On December 15, Medina, who had been in a coma for nearly four months, died in hospital. The current review of Aziza is still ongoing.
Aziza, Medina and Davlatov
The sensational and tragic "Medina case" caused different reactions on social media: on the one hand, people condemned the cruel crimes committed by Davlatov's "eldest wife" against the "second wife"; on the other hand, many people condemned Medina for interfering in other people's marriages. Even after Medina's death, some netizens called on the "second wives" to reflect on their behavior.
Several of these commentators or their female close relatives faced the same fate: their husbands secretly married other women (religious marriages). This brought great misfortune to their families.
Some netizens said that their sister also lived in boundless pain because of her husband's "remarriage". The two were married by blood, plus they had children, so they never divorced. Because the sister could not accept that the husband's other wife and the children she had given birth to, she also quarreled and provoked, but to no avail. In the end, for more than a decade, he could not ease the relationship with her husband, and her mood was depressed, and she even needed to seek help from a psychologist.
Another netizen said that her friend was also a "second wife" and had also been "beaten, scolded, and threatened." But still chose to be with a powerful husband and had 4 children.
Husband is everything?
This situation also shows the other side of "polygamy". Previously, the media wrote about why women agreed to form marriages that were not protected by law from the perspective of "second wives", but now it forces people to re-examine the scale of this phenomenon and evaluate its trends as a whole.
It is true that it is impossible to literally estimate the number of "second wives", since Tajikistan law does not allow such marriages, and therefore there are no corresponding official statistics. But in reality, almost every Tajikistani person is likely to know at least one woman who is a "second wife".
Sociologist Gulnora, for her part, said indirect statistics show that tajikistan "cannot exist." But in the case of labor migration, where most of the active male population moves out, there are exceptions to everything.
"According to official data for 2020, women make up 49.5 percent of the total population and 50.5 percent of men, or 96 women for every 100 men," she said. That is, there can be no second wife. But in reality, it exists because of the labor migration of the majority of the male population, resulting in a gender imbalance in the country. For example, the rural population is mostly left-behind elderly, children and women. ”
In this imbalance and fierce competition in the "marriage market", women often feel the pressure of a society that has become accustomed to early marriage and early childbearing.
Beknazarova said that the Tajik nation has many fine traditions, such as respecting elders, but there are also some bad habits that cannot meet the requirements of the modern world. For example, girls are indoctrinated from an early age with the idea that they must marry and have children, and make starting a family a life goal.
"It's a very old tradition," she said. But it was in the feudal era when labor was needed for farm work, so young people married early and had many children. But times have changed. Now, you not only need to get a higher education, but also need to constantly improve your qualifications in order to create financial conditions for yourself. Still, there is a stereotype in society that women must marry early. ”
Beknazarova believes that this educational philosophy makes women very vulnerable and extremely dependent on the family. So when a marriage breaks down, they even take extreme measures. Some fight for their husbands, and some may even commit suicide with their children, especially women who are not financially self-sufficient.
Another problem is that the paternal system in Tajikistan is very imperfect. After divorce, men often give up custody and leave it entirely to the woman to take responsibility for the upbringing of the children. Alimony, on the other hand, is so small that even if the man has a good income, he conceals it to avoid paying alimony.
On the other hand, stereotypes have an impact not only on women, but also on men. Beknazarova explains that parents often choose their son's first marriage partner. After a period of time, the man either divorces and remarries or simply finds another wife.
Statistics show that the average age of marriage in Tajikistan is 21-22 years for women and 25-26 years for men.
Single mom
Another problem posed by polygamy is the rights of the child. Men in these marriages do not always formally recognize their children and give them their own surnames, so that the rights of the children are not protected.
Human rights activist NachbaShirinbekova said that the Family Code only recognizes marriages registered in the state civil registry.
Although the Constitution prohibits polygamy and even lists it as a criminal case, children born in unregistered marriages have the same rights as children born in formal marriages. The prerequisite is that the man must voluntarily acknowledge paternity through the registry, otherwise his second wife will not be able to prove the relationship between the man and the child.
"In general, polygamy is common not only among high-income people, but also among people with low incomes, no housing, no property, or stable jobs." Schlembekova said.
The traditional procedure provided for in the Family Code does not apply to situations such as the death or divorce of a spouse in such a marital relationship. In other words, the woman must prove through civil litigation that the two have formed a family, purchased controversial items such as furniture, real estate, vehicles, etc., and jointly raised children.
"The property and inheritance rights of the legal spouse are protected by the Family Code." Schlembekova said.
According to her, if a man has a "formal wife" and at the same time has a "second wife" and a "third wife", then in the above case, the latter is difficult to be recognized, and at most it can only recognize the parent-child relationship and get some meager alimony.
Because the man admits that this marital relationship is also at risk of being prosecuted for "bigamy", he is marked with a "criminal record" and leaves a stain on his resume.
In short, the so-called second and third wives and their children are legally extremely vulnerable. Worryingly, despite this, women will still accept the role for a variety of reasons. Schlembekova said.
Source: Voices of Asia
Author: Ramzia Mirzobekova
Compile: Vika
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Producer: Zhang Xingding Editor: Pan Qi