preface:
At the time of writing this article, I happened to see a piece of news from the past: a 5-year-old boy has been playing with his mobile phone for 3 years and wakes up with almost no black eyeballs. I'll just let it go, and you feel it for yourself. Here is the text:
First of all, this is an article with cases, methods, and theoretical support, although you see that I am usually quite able to pull, but in order to study and understand this problem, I have almost broken CNKI, so it may be a little long, you are patient.
This article mainly focuses on the method of game guidance for 2- to 8-year-old children, that is, preschool and primary and secondary grades. Why choose such an age group, the first is because our two babies just belong to this range, which is easier to observe and summarize; the second is a hundred passes, some of the truths are the same; the third is that most of the babies at this age are in preschool and the first and second grades, and the sense of autonomy is not so strong, especially suitable for point of view input (brainwashing).
1
The history of our baby playing games can be traced back to more than 4 years old, one day when I was not at home, my pig teammate downloaded a small game for him, with the great idea of "giving it fish, it is better to teach it to fish", and at the same time taught him how to download the game, helping him open up a new continent. At first I was excited and screamed: How can you teach him this?! But no matter how to call it, I couldn't disturb the little head playing the game next to me, and I understood that it was my main battlefield again.
In more than two years, through multiple small-scale collisions. I roughly summarized some small experiences, wrote down this process, hoping to give you a little inspiration, even a little, I did not write in vain.
Stage 1: The stage of wanting to play the game
Anything that hasn't been fresh is super fun, super magical, and the game is no exception. Some children are banned by their parents, they are very obedient and do not play. But my family can't do it, every time I see him playing, I just say don't play, and then get the phone back, but he will still ask me.
I really didn't want to play with him, at first he listened, and then secretly took my mobile phone, guessed the password, and then took advantage of my lack of attention, actually began to grab my mobile phone, crying, had no choice, I changed the way of strategy.
Stage 2: Set the time to play the game each day
The reason for this was that I really didn't want to watch him play games every day, so I forced him to play with his mobile phone. But almost every day, he would look for me pitifully, or beg me, and then sneak the old man's mobile phone under the pillow. I looked at it, didn't this raise the status of the mobile phone in his heart a little? It became a treasure in his heart, so I changed my way.
I asked him, do you really want to play? This is also quite interesting in fact. He was particularly incredulous: Can I really? Sure, but remember that there are only 10 minutes a day. He happily took the phone away. I would tell him 1 minute in advance that the time was up and that I would have to get my phone back when I arrived.
Notice that at first he must not have wanted to give it to you, and his mouth was talking about playing for a while and playing for a while, and his eyes were not moving. Then you don't get angry, and finally take it back and calmly tell him that you timed out for 5 minutes today, one minute is equivalent to a day, and you can't play with your mobile phone for the next 5 days, wait for the 6th day to recover, and then resolutely implement. He will settle the account himself, and it will definitely be more appropriate to return it on time and do it when he says it.
Stage Three: Get involved in the game and take him to a more holistic view
At this stage he still plays for a while every day, but I sometimes ask him, do you know why you like to play games so much? Do you want to know how the game is made? Children, just better than adolescence, will be on the set immediately.
From time to time, I talk to him about various things about the game industry, such as what psychology you have used in the design process, why there are gold coins here, why there are treasure chests, etc., and I also talk to him about the profit model of the game and the huge profits behind it. Later, he came to a conclusion on his own: I think they are all pretty bad, a group of adults designing our little children behind our backs. Finally, he said, Mom, I understand what you mean, but I still want to play the game, I said play it, I will talk to you casually.
At this stage, I will also participate in his games, and I will control each game. The game is really fun, the head is low, an hour has passed. We played a mechanical maze and now I remember it vividly, he passed the level faster than I did, but unfortunately the company that produced the game later closed its doors. We also played Guard Radish, and sometimes I counted him down: How can you be so stupid and rise to the top first. There was also a stickman game, which I felt was a bit violent and didn't let him continue. The progress at this stage is that the game is automatically closed as soon as the time comes, and the pad is returned to me.
Stage 4: Adjust the time with the adjustment
Soon, he was in the first grade of elementary school, and at the beginning, he wanted to play games every night off, but you know, time was tight after school. I sat down with him that day to talk, and I said that I think the time after class is more tense now, these 10-15 minutes I want you to run around in the courtyard, I don't want you to play games, and if you always think about it every day, it will affect your attention a little.
He was a little sad and said what to do. I said, well, I'll change the daily play time to chess time, you can play Go or chess, the game is on Saturdays and Sundays, you can play 20 minutes a day. He was overjoyed to hear that, because he thought that playing chess was as fun as a game, and he had obviously earned it.
We just stabilized, playing games on Saturdays and Sundays when he was fine, as if he had forgotten about this thing, and occasionally a busy weekend would forget. At this point, I think he or I really learned how to get along with the game.
2
Taken together, there are a few points that are more practical:
First, it is better to block than to loosen. Playing games may be a problem that many boys will face, and once he starts to discover the new continent of games, it is basically unstoppable. Even if it is forbidden by a few slaps now, perhaps adolescence will usher in a stronger backlash, so it should be mainly channeled. We can guide him to use the Network to consult information, we can guide programming as an interest, we can guide him to do small animations, so that he can discover the world of the Internet, everything.
Second, families should not create an environment for playing games. Psychologists refer to this behavior of parents playing games as "parental electronics interference", and surveys have shown that both parental and maternal electronic product interference and online game addiction are significantly positively correlated. But you have to say, I don't do anything, play games every day, I still want my family not to play games, every day to do what to do? To be honest, if your children can not be raised by yourself, it may be a good thing.
Third, protect children's self-confidence, accept and channel children's emotions at school. Psychologists believe that cognitive individuals with depression, social anxiety, and negative self-evaluation are prone to Internet addiction. My mother used to say that she really liked to learn well when she was teaching in junior high school, but she was very sympathetic to poor students. That part of the students, listening is not understandable, everyone in class they look out the window, the loneliness of which is difficult for ordinary people to understand. But this is the big pot of rice, you can eat more when you can eat, and no one will help you adjust your taste if you can't eat it. So we parents can help find ways to learn and digest emotions in school, but we must not ask for complete blame, so that children's self-esteem is low to dust.
Fourth, teach children to identify information. Whether it is for the stage of 2 to 8 years old, or for teenagers in the future, screening information is a compulsory education that does not have energy to cover for the time being, but it is particularly important, after all, the Internet is indispensable to our lives, and the majestic waves will inevitably wash up some mud and sand.
Fifth, parents need to put the game in the right position from the heart. The game is really not a flood beast, don't pick up the phone as soon as you see the child: "Oh my God, my god, what if my son is going to become an Internet addicted teenager!" "If you can think of it as a one-week after-school tutoring class, one hour a week is spread to Friday, Saturday, or Three days, which is only 20 minutes a day."
Expand the communication range of children of the same age. This is a problem that teenagers must pay attention to, I don't know if you have a feeling, usually after school or Saturdays and Sundays, in addition to children on the street is adults, the elderly, the youth group seems to have disappeared out of thin air, and then come out is already a social person. You may see this answer to this question:
Know the netizens
3
In general, compared with the adolescent period, it is simply too easy to manage the game reasonably in preschool and junior grades, because first of all, he does not have external learning pressure and inferiority complex; secondly, they do not have online social needs at this age. I still remember when I was in junior high school, I was eager to sleep with QQ, but in fact, it didn't take long to shift my interests, so I believed that my children were more important than anything else.
Finally, the popular "you let him play, play for a few days, in addition to eating and sleeping, play games, once play disgusting, will not play again" This way is easy not to try. Because it's too human, after all, the game is really too much fun!!!
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