A new documentary "Little Boy" recently released by Station B was brushed by netizens in a few days, and it got a high score of 9.8 in Douban. In particular, the small protagonist of the first episode, Wu Gangyun, made netizens crazy to brush the screen for her.
Wu Gangyun is 11 years old this year, and she has been in love with dance since she was 6 years old, but the family's financial conditions do not allow her to go to a professional dance school to study, and all her basic skills are self-taught from dance teaching videos on the Internet. Whether in the field or in her mother's raw meat shop, she can dance without anyone around, and the focused look makes people can't help but hold their breath and sigh for this simple beauty.
Despite practicing hard every day, Xiao Gangyun only mastered the basic movements, and without the guidance of professional teachers, it was difficult for her to get closer. Fortunately, in 2018, she was introduced to Zhang Ping, a dance teacher from Beijing.
Zhang Ping and his wife have been committed to the public welfare activities of left-behind children for many years, Wu Gangyun has made significant progress under their guidance, and Zhang Ping also specially choreographed a dance "The Wizard of Oz" for Wu Gangyun and other children who love dance, which was later featured on the CCTV variety channel "Departure to Happiness".
If this documentary is just about how Xiao Gangyun developed and grew, it may not get a high score of 9.8. In the second half of the film, Xiao Gangyun has undergone a lot of changes. Since the beijing performance, Xiao Gangyun's mentality has undergone subtle changes, Zhang Ping said that she may be a little "floating", as if she has lost her love and original intention of dance, and she is often absent-minded when practicing.
During the summer vacation, Wu Gangyun also gave up his dance class and went to learn martial arts. In the martial arts class, she found that life without dance was so boring, and the original intention of dancing in the past slowly returned to her heart.
After encountering setbacks and confusion, Wu Gangyun regained his original intention and continued to work hard, and netizens said that this is the real life.
Nowadays, many parents always do their best to meet their children's requirements in the education of their children, almost what the child wants. Girls are also dressed like dolls, and some children's dressing styles have moved closer to adults, and many primary school girls usually love to discuss how to dress up and buy cosmetics. There are fewer and fewer children like Wu Gangyun who are naturally carved.
Educator Li Meijin once warned parents not to dress up their children too well, especially girls, which is not "talking about the river".
How a daughter is "rich"
There used to be a saying that was very popular: boys should be poor and girls should be rich. Many people enshrine it as a Bible, especially families that have given birth to girls, who have raised their daughters as princesses and babies since childhood, and try to choose the best for their daughters in food, clothing, shelter and transportation.
In some families, the mother herself loves to dress up, and with her daughter, she is even more out of control, dressing up the child every day, even giving her makeup, regardless of the child's young age, she wears lipstick and nail polish.
In fact, the original meaning of the sentence that girls want to be rich has been misunderstood. The rich cultivation here refers to both the material level and the spiritual level of "wealth", and many people ignore the spiritual "wealth" and blindly use money to build a flashy "rich" for children, so that there is only a hundred harms and no benefits.
Because the simple use of materials to fill a child's life and ignore the child's inner satisfaction, it is not easy to establish a spiritual connection between the child and the parent, and it often becomes a simple economic supply and demand relationship. It is also easy to cause the characteristics of arrogance and arbitrariness in the child's personality.
When such a child grows up, he thinks that he is too delicate to be easily welcomed, which is likely to cause a huge psychological gap and make it difficult to obtain a real sense of happiness.
On the contrary, raising children spiritually can shape a strong heart for children, and can cultivate children's independent, strong, brave character and complete personality. Never let the child is a daughter and everything is taken care of by adults, which will cause the child to lack exercise and self-care ability, and cultivate the character of relying on others for everything.
This requires parents to spend more time and patience to find an educational method that suits their children. Spiritual enrichment is more rare than material enrichment.
Don't dress up kids too well, especially girls
Li Meijin is a professor at the Public Security University, majoring in juvenile delinquency psychology, many of her educational concepts are welcomed by contemporary parents, she believes that parents can not spoil their children, but also can not blindly force children to become mature, her own daughter is not a genius, just an ordinary music teacher.
Li Meijin reminded Chinese parents not to dress their children too well, especially girls, what is the reason for this.
First of all, paying too much attention to dressing up can easily affect children's learning. Every child has no concept of dressing when he is a child, but some parents pay great attention to the appearance of their children, often commenting on the children's dress, in fact, they instilled the aesthetics of adults into children who do not yet understand things.
In the long run, children will pay special attention to appearance and dress, as long as they are in front of people, they will care about whether they are dressed eye-catchingly and whether they are beautiful, which will affect their attention, and the focus of life will be on flashy appearance and dressing, and neglect to learn.
Secondly, it is easy to make children love vanity. There was once such an example, a primary school girl Lily told her mother that the classmates in the class were wearing Hanfu, she also wanted a good-looking Hanfu, the mother ordered a set online, but the daughter ran home crying, because the classmates laughed at her clothes as a bargain, not on the grade.
This example is not an isolated phenomenon, many children now because of the degree of eating and wearing are not worried, they often compete together whose clothes are famous brands, whose skirts are more expensive, this kind of mutual comparison behavior will not only cause unnecessary financial burdens to parents, but also let children develop bad habits of coveting vanity.
Finally, spending money to dress up children often can make children have the wrong concept of consumption. Many young people in modern times live a life of insufficient income, and it is because of excessive consumption that they are in debt.
If you do not establish a correct economic concept for your children from an early age, but vigorously buy a lot of unnecessary clothing for your children, such children will be prone to falling into a situation of excessive consumption when they grow up.
Parents should choose clothes for their children to be comfortable and generous, and over-dressing children will only "pull up seedlings and promote growth", resulting in bad results.
A sound family does not equal a sound family education
Professor Li Meijin also believes that many problems in modern society are "seeds" planted from the time when people are very young. Sometimes a sound family does not equal a healthy family, does not mean having a sound family education.
Professor Li said that many families are now mother-led in educating children, because women are more careful and patient, which would have been understandable, but some men will use this to shirk their responsibilities in family education, thinking that managing children is a matter for women, men do not have to care, this statement is of course wrong.
In early childhood, children are still in a period of external emotional attachment and connection, and a good parent-child relationship is very important. At this time, the father should take on his own responsibility and establish a "relationship network" at home, especially not to let the child think that he is the center of the family, but when the mother takes care of the child, the father takes care of the mother, and the child in turn cares about the father, so that the family relationship forms a good closed loop, which is a healthy educational environment.
When the child grows up and enters adolescence, he will establish a network of relationships outside the family, if the education he receives in the family relationship is equal and mutual love, he will treat others with the same attitude, how he builds the future family is actually a great reference to his own family.
brief summary:
Many of us are always prone to fall into various misunderstandings when facing education problems, and the most likely illusion is to meet all the requirements of children materially is to give children the best education.
Spiritual satisfaction is the best gift for a child than material things, but it is very difficult to achieve. For example, companionship is a difficult thing to do, and many parents would rather look at their phones than accompany their children to tell a story for ten minutes.
For example, understanding, it is even more difficult, most parents will use adult standards to ask children, they can not accept that children have their own thoughts, but also need to be respected.
Instead of studying how to dress up children every day, it is better to study how to give children better companionship, support, understanding and respect, which can make children grow up healthier and happier.