Text | Rice grain mom
It is said that the rice grain mother saw a very happy wedding video.
The couple who got married began to fall in love from middle school, carried through the encirclement and interception of parents and teachers, and finally became a family member. At the wedding scene, the class teacher who had dismantled their CP was also invited to be the witness of the marriage.
Middle school students fall in love, and in the eyes of the class teacher, they are flood beasts.
The class teacher said that she was a master of cp, and she knew who was a pair with whom at a glance, and she was also a master of breaking CP.
This pair at the wedding scene, she also demolished, did not expect to be beaten by their happiness more than ten years later!
"Science" early love
Rice grain mother in "I would like to find a quasi-family, but the son is not powerful! Has cried faint in the toilet" wrote about the divine operation of Haidian parents.
A blogger posted that in a famous middle school in Haidian, two junior high school students fell in love early, and the teacher routinely invited parents.
As a result, as soon as the parents of the two sides met, there was a great situation of seeing each other and hating the night, the more they looked at it, the more pleasing it was, and they directly told the teacher, teacher, you don't interfere, don't delay learning.
The teacher probably didn't expect such a result, right? Even some parents, every New Year's Holiday, still walk around like relatives, and even press the old money to seal more.
This kind of early love, which is recognized and supported by parents, is figuratively called "scientific early love".
Love pays attention to the consistency of the three views, and the formation of the three views has a great relationship with the family background and learning background.
At the same Haidian Niu School, there are many similarities in the planning of children's education, including the school district housing in Haidian and the strength to rank among key middle schools.
Whether it is the parents' educational philosophy, material and financial resources, or the child's excellent level, it can be regarded as the right door.
Think about the long term, the middle school era of young plum bamboo horses, know the roots, less adult love may be the regional differences, long-distance marriage and long-distance troubles.
In the blogger's post, it has raised scientific early love to a new height, becoming another effort by the middle class to preserve its own status.
Whether it is hardware or software, such early love is worthy of the word "science".
Seeing this green plum bamboo horse two small no guess, rice grain mother can't help but think of my early love in the campus era (rice grain father please close your eyes).
The early love of the rice grain mother is from the beginning of high school, of course, the careful thinking of the rice grain mother can not hide the fire-eyed golden-eyed rice grain grandmother. However, the performance of the rice grain grandmother is really very fashionable.
Now think about it, the rice grain grandmother is actually a supporter of "scientific early love".
At that time, when My Grandmother saw my little boyfriend, she was a little angry and thought he wasn't handsome enough (but he was talented!). ）。
Even, my grandmother took me to see the handsome guy in the next class and told me that it was called a handsome guy, and your eyes were average!
Can't stand the little boyfriend to study well, don't you think that boys who study well reveal the light of wisdom everywhere?
With the help of xueshen boyfriend, the rice grain mother progressed rapidly, stunned to turn herself into half a xueba, is this early love very inspirational?
In fact, whether it is early love or adult love, common progress and common growth is a benign relationship.
If because of a relationship, all day long to die to live, learning to regress work messy, such a relationship is a kind of consumption, difficult to last.
"Science" early love, win at the starting line?
When it comes to early love, many people's reaction is a flood of beasts, especially in the critical period of study, falling in love is the representative of the loss of playthings.
Therefore, many teachers and parents will take a clear stand against early love.
As the chongqing wedding class teacher said, it is not easy for middle school students to fall in love, to avoid the teacher's open gun, but also to guard against the parents' dark arrows, it is really rare to be able to cultivate positive results.
Rice's mother remembered a sad news about early love. Xiao Feng, a 14-year-old girl in Guangzhou, did not achieve satisfactory results in the middle school entrance examination, and the difference of 2 points was missing from key middle schools.
When her parents checked her mobile phone, they found that she had early love, and she also admitted it herself. As a result, her mother was very angry, criticized Xiao Feng, and slapped her several times, and Xiao Feng ran away from home in a rage and fell to his death.
The child has not been admitted to the ideal key middle school, and it is normal for parents to be disappointed, and this matter is also a relatively heavy blow to the child.
The early love that was immediately discovered seems to have become a scapegoat for the failure of the child's examination. Parents' criticism and scolding of their children have become the last straw that overwhelms their children.
Early love in middle school, it is difficult to say whether it is real love or the impulse of youth ignorance. But there is no doubt that the parents' tough way of dealing with it will cause the child to resist more strongly.
For adolescent children, they are not fighting for "love", but for "freedom".
What happened to the children who were "tricked" into this school by their parents in "The Children who were "tricked" into this school? "The Ugly Duckling School, which specializes in enrolling students with problematics.
In the Ugly Duckling School, many students are simply and rudely interfered with by their parents because of early love, and finally the problem of early love gradually expands to the point of being bored with school and dropping out of school, and even working with their parents, becoming a veritable "problem student".
Zhan Danian, the principal of the Ugly Duckling School, shared the story of a girl. The girl was 15 years old and had an early love, and her mother forcibly separated her from her and her little boyfriend and sent her to the ugly duckling school that specializes in "curing" early love.
The girl was very angry, and when she arrived at school, she wrote a letter full of abusive words to Zhan Danian.
After the girl sent the letter out, she waited for the storm and was ready to fight zhan Danian at any time, but she did not wait.
Zhan Danian said that some people feel that the dignity of the principal has been insulted, and I think there is nothing. The 15-year-old girl was torn apart when she felt that love was very sweet, and she must have been very angry in her heart. She simply expressed that she was very bitter inside and vented her dissatisfaction.
This girl, who resisted by writing letters to challenge the authority of the school, and some children, chose a more radical way.
Rice grain mother found that whether it was before or now, many parents only have one string in them, that is, their children's learning. As long as it does not affect learning, others can give in. As long as it affects learning, everything is in vain.
Compared with his parents, the child is still weak, and there are only two things that he can completely control, one is learning, and the other is himself. These two things are exactly what parents care about most.
Therefore, in order to rebel against their parents, some children choose to drop out of school, and some children choose to hurt themselves. Either way, it is difficult for parents to accept. 、
Compared with the simple and rude treatment of parents for early love, "scientific early love" is indeed won at the starting point.
Now children are precocious, and parents' attitude towards their children's early love is also more enlightened.
For early love, excessive intervention is not advisable
The rice grain mother feels that early love is not a big rebellious thing, but the inevitable development of the child's physical development, and it is also the embodiment of the child's emotional needs.
Zhan Danian said in his speech that a parent scolded him and said that my son seems to be in love now.
Zhan Danian replied with a smile and said, Your peach tree did not bloom because it was planted here. Spring is here, and it will blossom everywhere you plant.
The budding of children's emotions and the development of good feelings for friends of the opposite sex are normal stages of development. Not to mention middle school students, now primary school students and even kindergarten children have their favorite people.
Rice grain mother in "I would like to find a quasi-family, but the son is not powerful! "Crying in the Toilet" wrote about the little straight man's rice grain being "confessed".
It was the first semester after the pandemic last year, and less than a month into the start of school, Rice Tsurugi threw me a letter angrily saying he had been slandered.
As soon as I listened, the matter of being "slandered" could not be underestimated, so I quickly opened the letter and looked at it, where is the shadow of "slander", obviously concerned and missed?
The rice grain mother read it twice, and the letter used soft and delicate language to describe the thoughts that had not been seen for a long time, and there were several dark pokes and pokes!
I only mentioned a little at the end of the letter, hoping that the rice grains would be more serious when doing the exercises, otherwise they would be scolded by the teacher.
This dangling concern turned out to be an insult in the eyes of the grain of rice for not being serious about his. "Coveted" his position as squad leader
Although, the rice grain mother has long been fully prepared, if the rice grain early love what to do, how to scientifically guide him to be a responsible little man.
Anyway, I was ready, but the grain of rice obviously didn't.
After all, scientific early love is a bit like Dayu Zhishui, which adopts thinning rather than blocking.
But everything is too late, and excessive intervention in the child's early love, whether it is positive "science" or negative "suppression", is not a wise choice.
In essence, the parents' support for "scientific" early love also has a bit of the meaning of "arranged marriage". Parents look at the right eyes, the door is right, the child's excellent degree matches, like the ancient "parents' fate matchmaker's words"?
In the middle school era of love, there are very few people who can really cultivate positive results and enter the palace of marriage.
There are even people who, when they think of the love they didn't know in middle school, have a sense of loss of "how can I like him".
When the child's three views have not yet been fully formed, if the parents interfere too much in the love of the child when they are ignorant, it will give the child more pressure.
A small love of "coming and going in a hurry", with the support of parents and teachers, even if the love is gone one day, the cost of saying goodbye has become higher, and it has become an embarrassment to ride a tiger.
In the face of children who have just opened their love sinuses, the wisest thing for parents is to be a good guide on the road of their children's feelings.
Recognize and understand the child's emotions, so that the child can face himself squarely, and teach the child to recognize what a good relationship is. A good relationship is that two people can progress together, run hand in hand to the sunshine, and see a better future.
Teach children to face feelings in the right way, draw a bottom line for children, and don't let ignorant feelings become regrets in children's lives.
The rice grain mother feels that it is enough to be a parent and a good guide on the child's emotional road.
As for the emotional communication with the prospective family, helping the child to connect with the emotion, etc., or forget it, keep a pure youth memory for the child!
Personal profile: @ Rice Mother Channel (welcome to pay attention), Rice Mother, American returnee, Haidian parents, when the first place in the new book list "Parent-child English Book That Affects Children's Lives" author. Focus on learning dry goods, educational experience sharing, education and further education of children aged 5-12, English, mathematics, science enlightenment, and the world's novelty recommendation, welcome to pay attention! (0~5 years old bao mom please pay attention to: @ rice grain mother love to share)