Confucius said, "I have five out of ten and am determined to learn, thirty and standing, forty and not confused, fifty and knowing the mandate of heaven, sixty and obedient, seventy and do what the heart desires, and do not exceed the rules." This means that at the age of fifteen I aspire to the way of the university; at the age of thirty I am able to stand on my own feet in the Tao; at the age of forty I am able to be fooled; at the age of fifty I understand the fundamental laws of the physics of the Heavenly Dao; at the age of sixty I know everything I know; and at the age of seventy I can do whatever I want without going beyond the Dhamma." Indeed, it is impossible for a person in his twenties or thirties to attain a very high level, a very comprehensive level. Confucius was a very remarkable person, and he had to go through such a long cultivation process. He must have practice, accumulation, success, failure, joy, and tears in order to grow slowly, let alone us. If you read a good book, you can win the battle? Read a medical book and become a surgeon? What an easy one. Education, too, is a long-term process.
Parents should start from an early age in their children's mental health education. Educating children first is the education of people, which is a lifelong thing. The score is high or low, whether you will play the piano, this is secondary, the first thing is to be a person, will be a person to become a talent. Whether a child can become a talent in the future, his wisdom influence is limited, the heart, character, mind, and courage are the key, which is very related to the education of parents. For the education of children, the environment should be relaxed and guided, so that he feels that learning is the vitality from the heart. Today's child is reluctant to communicate with adults because his world is different from yours. Telling stories to children is a fun process and a great form of education. In fact, the power of family education is very strong, the question is whether you will educate. Don't force your child to do and don't do anything.
There is a father, he has a teenage daughter, especially like basketball, think that basketball is an art, but also practice taekwondo, but the study is not affected, the results are always in the top few. The father told his daughter a few words, the class must be concentrated, understand, review after class, there is time in advance to see what difficulties. His daughter watched TV and always liked to watch natural, historical, scientific, and her father never restricted her. She loves to go to bookstores, she likes to buy world famous books, and she loves books the most. Fathers and daughters chat, like friends, say everything, communicate equally, and are not condescending. Sometimes there are some contradictions between classmates, the daughter is also upset and angry, and the father tells the daughter that this is very normal in interpersonal communication. Let her feel that these contradictions are small things, don't make a fuss, don't go too far into your heart, and learn to be generous. When she encounters something, tell her about a method, and let her handle the specific things herself.
If parents value small things, children will also value small things. Parents always cultivate children to be careful with their eyes, and children are always careful with their eyes, and they are careful with their small belly and chicken intestines. Now there are many families whose parents speak evilly to their children, which is not right, or they must respect each other, communicate equally, and let the children grow up in a very relaxed environment.
Your words may determine a child's life. I have a kid who draws great and always has to be first. People asked, "Your parents don't know how to draw, how can your paintings be so good?" His father was not very literate, but he was very good at educating children. When he first saw the child drawing blindly, the cat was not like a cat, and the dog was not like a dog, and his father said, "Child, the painting is so good, I like to see the paintings you draw." The child thought, dad said I drew well, and the next day I painted again. "Oh, today is better than yesterday, the painting is more like, I can't draw it yet!" That's encouragement, even though the child draws messily. In this way, the more children like to draw, the more they draw, the better. Another girl, loves to sing. Originally, she sang well, but once when she sang, her mother said next to her: "What, don't sing, you still want to sing with this broken voice." From then on, the little girl swore that she would never sing for the rest of her life.
You see, a sentence ruins a child's whole life, and his parents don't realize it. This is not only a matter of cultivating children's interests, but more importantly, it is a problem of cultivating children to have a good mentality, and it is necessary to cultivate children to have firm faith, not afraid of difficulties, and not afraid of setbacks. Being a person is the most important, whether a child can become a talent in the future, the difference in human wisdom is limited, the key is the heart, character, mind and belly, which is very related to the quality of the parents themselves. Some parents only attach importance to IQ, do not pay attention to emotional intelligence, and do not attach importance to mental health education, which will delay the growth of their children.
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