Know how to refuse
How to make children know how to refuse
I like this very much, learning to reject is something that people have been learning all their lives. How to make your rejection conform to your heart without hurting the other person is the balance that many people have been looking for.
How do you develop this ability from the time you are a baby? In fact, it only takes two steps.
As a parent, the first step in teaching your child how to use your intuition is to make them feel safe and confidently say "no"! By showing children their abilities to know them best, it is important to teach them to express their inner emotions in the right way at the right time.
In the first example, at home, the child can decide for himself whether to give someone a hug or not to talk to someone else. Many times, the elders of the family will ask the children to perform various "shows", singing, dancing, etc. The child can say "I don't want to dance today". She will not be coerced, coerced, threatened, bullied, degraded, humiliated or punished for not wanting to give someone a hug or a show, nor will she get her family to say, "Come and put on a show." Quite simply, respect the child, respect the child's voice, and when her rejection doesn't affect the normal code of conduct, as a parent, I think it's normal and doesn't need to interfere, and, sometimes I encourage her to speak her voice. My trust with her is also strengthening little by little, and this relationship will continue forever.
Of course, accepting a child's "no" is not an easy task. When we ask our child to do something and we are rejected, our hearts say, "Mom is just asking you to do something..." Then we have to calmly explain our starting point to the child. We are taught to follow traditions and respect our families, and many times we lose sight of our true thoughts. Licking the back of the wound late at night, more or less in memory. Parents who do not want their favorite children to experience this wave of harm can try to slowly accept the "no" that their children give themselves, so that they can slowly learn to say "no" as they grow up.
Often, it is not socially acceptable for anyone to hear a child say "no" to a parent, relative, or any adult. This reaction actually indirectly illustrates that when a child is asked to do something to "please others," we ask the child to cooperate with herself so that we and the child can be recognized. Parents sometimes hinder face, communication and other factors, and cannot or dare not follow their intuition. In the process, it also gives the child a false example of not being able to refuse the demands of others.
When parents' friends bring their children to the house, children usually have no resistance to novel toys, and they are overwhelmed to play, and the children's toys are like experiencing a disaster in the toy world. When the adults are not there, the children in the family will choose to protect their toys and say to the visiting children, "These toys are not played like this, they should be opened slowly, you treat my toys so roughly, they will break." After being reminded, most of the time, the visiting children will relent. Or, at the end of the party, the visiting children will say, "I like this dinosaur, I want to take it away." The children in the family usually say, "You are welcome to come back to the house to play next time, the toys are placed here with me, and the next time you come, you can play with me." Yes, highly emotionally intelligent children do know how to express their inner thoughts firmly and euphemistically. In fact, many times, parents can encourage their children to express themselves and demonstrate how their children can deal with possible frictions in different situations, and slowly children will understand how to deal with their own "crises".
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No matter how big or small, we must first ask ourselves whether we are embarrassed by what we are asked to do, whether we are asked to do what we are asked to do with our own selves
Be consistent. Next, consider what if faced with something that is being asked. Of course, children who are too young to communicate can only observe first. Learning to reject takes time and dedication, and being able to accept rejection from others.
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