There is an old Chinese saying called "filial piety under the stick", which means that children should dare to scold, which is very helpful for their character shaping and future growth.
We Chinese parents may be more willing to solve problems in this way, but in Western education, we do not agree with this approach, and this is mainly the reason why people's culture and ideological concepts are different.
Of course, the education of children should pay attention to the principle of moderation, children who make mistakes do need to be punished, but it is not necessary to use the form of scolding, but the children who grow up in these two ways, the gap is still very large, parents can not care.
01
Children who are "often beaten" and children who are "never beaten" are children
When you grow up, the gap is obvious
MingMing and Yangyang are two little boys who are neighbors to each other, and although their homes are close, their homeschooling has always been two completely different ways.
Because Ming has always been very naughty, and his father is more strict, once he makes a mistake, he cannot avoid a "love education", but fortunately, the child's personality is greatly grinning and never remembers revenge, and finally he is disciplined very disciplined.
But Yangyang is different, since childhood by the family as a treasure, although they will be educated when they make mistakes, parents will not beat him but guide their children how to deal with it, so until now, Yangyang has been living in the greenhouse.
Therefore, although Yangyang's psychological endurance has deteriorated, he is very willing to listen to his parents' words. On the contrary, although Ming has always been optimistic and strong, he also likes to use violence to solve problems when dealing with them.
Analysis: In fact, whether to hit the child has not been too clearly defined standards, parents are for the good of the child, sometimes it is inevitable to choose this way.
But one thing parents should know is that whether children should use this method to educate and educate their own personality and form of expression is very much related, so parents should pay attention to it.
02
Hot-tempered parents believe that children cannot be talented without fighting
1. Avoid bigger mistakes in your child
Parents with bad tempers will think that I beat my child for his own good, save him not to remember sex, and then make more serious mistakes, so this way is a kind of warning.
Children who make mistakes should be taught some lessons, and if you don't pay the price for it, you may be in a worse state.
2. Think that hitting is the most effective way
Then there is this kind of parents who generally think that playing must be the simplest and most powerful way, so I can save a lot of energy and convey the most direct effect, at least the child is very afraid.
But if parents are accustomed to educating their children in this way, I am afraid that the child's psychology will also be hurt to a certain extent.
3. It can cultivate children's ability to resist setbacks
It is also good to let children receive lessons appropriately, and their ability to resist setbacks can be improved as a result.
But everything has boundaries, and if we are so naïve to think that and constantly break through the child's bottom line, the child will definitely be hurt.
03
Temperamental parents believe that children should be patient in education
1. Hitting the child only works for a while
Good-natured parents are very sensible, they may not deny this way of scolding, but they definitely know that this is an option that is occasionally executed, and often hitting will be counterproductive.
Therefore, patience is more important when educating children, and we parents must first calm down, rather than adopting extreme methods at every turn!
2. Scolding is easy to arouse the child's rebellious psychology
Children are very spiritual, and our excessive scolding is not necessarily useful, but also makes the child more rebellious, which is very scary.
Once the reverse psychology is formed, the trajectory of the child's life will all change, and this situation will be difficult to recover.
3. Patient education can improve the parent-child relationship
If you want to make the parent-child relationship better, you still have to be more patient, give your child more love, and teach the truth, so that it is the most rational behavior.
Message: Educating children is indeed very hard and will make us very helpless, but parents must consider the long term and do not let emotions dominate their behavior.
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