Home and love psychology
Accept the child, the child is willing to trust you
As teachers and parents, we are always concerned about our children's health, but physical health is easy to manage, what about mental health? Many times we feel powerless, especially for parents of adolescent children.
How can parents judge the bad tendencies of children who already have psychological problems? If the child has psychological problems, how to intervene?
It is true that the causes of children's psychological problems are complex, and it is difficult for us to give a specific suggestion, but we can use simple and effective methods to pay attention to children's mental health, so as to correctly face the psychological problems of children.
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note! That's it
A sign that the child is having a psychological problem
Signal one: boredom
Children do not love school, parents will instinctively wake up, and will go to the external environment to find the problem: the school's teaching method is too rigid? Teachers behaving inappropriately? Kids being bullied at school? Of course, these can all be the cause. But if the child's performance is too different from other classmates, then parents should be vigilant about whether there is a problem with the child's mental health.
Signal two: addicted to the Internet and games
Nowadays, we are inseparable from the Internet almost every moment. But if the child is too addicted to the virtual world, or even gives up his future studies and interpersonal relationships, it may not only be unable to control himself, but there is a psychological problem.
Signal three: procrastination
If your child only occasionally procrastinates, it may simply be because of laziness. But if there is a delay, everything is delayed - control and guidance are ineffective, then what parents should do is not how to "educate", but should use scientific methods to solve the child's psychological problems.
Signal four: don't go out
Children are lively by nature, love outdoor activities, like to find a variety of fun, if you do not love to go out for a long time, do otaku otaku, it is likely to be psychologically problematic.
Signal five: Do not interact with people
There is a difference between being introverted and not interacting with people. Although introverted children do not like to take the initiative to express, but will send out their own interest in people through eyes, body language, etc., they do not want to become the center of the crowd, but quite like to stay in the middle of small partners. If a child does not interact with others, and even good friends are becoming more and more distant, parents must be very vigilant.
Signal Six: Hate the teacher
Similar to the first signal, parents have to find the reason for the child in addition to the teacher's reason. If a child has not had any opinions about the teacher before, and suddenly begins to hate the school and the teacher, it may be a signal that he hates the world.
Signal Seven: Smash things
Violence is a manifestation of psychological problems, and if you let your child draw a picture, take a video, and create a piece of music at this moment, it is likely to present a terrifying work. Many children will shut themselves in the house, desperately trying to drop things, smash things, and read words while smashing. At this time, it is often the child who has a lot of emotions to vent psychologically.
Signal Eight: Attack others
Smashing things is to throw anger at objects, and attacking others is to vent anger at people, which is an act of violence. Especially for adolescent children who have become sensible, violence is not only caused by personality, but also psychological problems.
Signal Nine: Examination Syndrome
Examination syndrome refers to the psychological disease that patients have fear due to poor psychological quality and facing the examination situation, accompanied by various uncomfortable physical and mental symptoms, resulting in examination failure, and can also form a vicious circle.
Signal 10: Irregular sleep
Many children have no interest in anything and love to sleep in bed, day and night. Other children do not sleep, or sleep poorly, which in turn can lead to listlessness during the day. Sleep has also become an excuse for psychological problems, or a way of sustenance.
Signal 11: There is a problem with diet
Many parents often regard the "anorexia" of their children as "picky eaters" and "gluttony" as "love to eat", in fact, irrepressibly do not love to eat and cannot stop uncontrollably when eating, which are the reflections of children's psychological problems.
The above signals, independently viewed, are not big problems, and may also be the performance of the child's adolescent self-reliance complex (commonly known as rebellion). But if a child has more than five signals, parents should pay great attention to it - the child is not only a generation gap with the parents, nor is it just a self-reliant complex of obedience, it is likely that he is experiencing a psychological obstacle that he has never experienced in his life.
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Don't panic! Exercise is the prevention of psychological problems
One of the easiest and most effective methods
Perhaps due to the epidemic, the importance of mental health problems for primary and secondary school students has suddenly become prominent. In fact, students' mental health problems have always been common, and the greater the pressure, the more serious the situation.
Have you found such a phenomenon: in real life, people who like sports are rarely depressed, and suicide rarely occurs. Everyone understands that exercise can enhance physical fitness, but the relationship with psychological state may not be known to many people.
1. Long-term exercise can effectively improve mood
Whether it is a school or a parent, or a child himself, there is always a misunderstanding: exercise and learning conflict. Learning is for the first purpose; sports are also possible, but with the same goal of gold medals. But in this way, movement is no longer movement, but another form of examination.
You know, bad mood is one of the important factors affecting suicidal people. Related studies have shown that physical activity can reduce adolescent pessimism and suicidal tendencies and can be used as an intervention to improve adolescent mental health.
Imagine: a child who does not love sports, the pressure of academics in class and class, the unhappy things in life, there is no channel for effective elimination, over time, there will be a phenomenon of not loving to communicate with people, and serious psychological diseases will be suffered. Children who love sports can often get rid of the negative emotions in their hearts faster through exercise, and they are more lively and cheerful.
2. Exercise helps to develop the qualities of persistence, patience and strong ability to resist setbacks
Weak willpower and poor resistance to setbacks are also an important factor affecting suicidal people. And sports are the most capable of cultivating students' persistence and perseverance. Imagine 365 days a year, each day to receive a different intensity and amount of training, this is not the average person can bear.
The reason why people who love sports are different, first of all, is their will to go forward, like Forrest Gump, as long as they hear "run", even if there is a sea of swords and fires in front of them, jackals and tigers, they can avoid it, and they can't avoid it!
The second is the awareness of abiding by the rules, every game has rules, each rule is like shackles, the game is to dance with shackles, the more who can adapt to the shackles, the more they can dance wonderfully.
Finally, exercise can help people go deep into the soul and discover themselves. You never know where your potential is, so let the body tell you. As someone said: when you feel that life is confused and life is at a loss, go to the track and field field and run two laps - there is nothing that cannot be solved by running two laps, if there is, then run two laps.
3. Exercise can improve children's ability to adapt to different environments
Poor environmental adaptability is also another important factor influencing student suicide. All sports students have the experience of exercising in different natural environments. That is, whether it is a bright sunshine or a wind and rain, whether it is a hot summer or a cold winter, training and competition must be carried out, and the adaptability of sports students to the natural environment is relatively strong.
One athlete recalled: One winter, the snow fell one after another, and a group of friends and I ran on the playground wearing sports shorts and short sleeves, and the teachers and classmates who passed by said: These athletes are crazy, on such a cold day, how can they run in so few clothes?
Perhaps, it is this so-called "madness" that not only makes their bodies accept the ravages of the cold winter, but also cultivates their strong will not to fear the cold.
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Map of psychological development at different ages,
Let's be targeted
The characteristics of children's psychological development are also different in different ages, and following this "map" of psychological development, we can focus on the psychological development of children.
1 to 2 years old
This is the initial stage of their perception of the world, feeling fresh and curious about everything and wanting to try all sorts of things.
As a parent, if you give them enough affirmation and encouragement at this stage, you will be able to cultivate your child's self-confidence and sense of security in the future.
This stage is also an important stage for the child to recognize and manage his own emotions, and he may need your guidance to correctly express his feelings of happiness, sadness, anger, need, and so on.
【Key elements】World cognition, emotional management
3 to 4 years old
Gain a deeper understanding of others and the world around you. Be able to be aware of interactions with others as well as each other's emotions.
For example, they may have friends who like to play together, or they may look at the faces of adults and realize that they may have done something wrong. We often say that we want to cultivate children's emotional intelligence, so from this age, we must start well: how to share toys with others, how to deal with conflicts, how to politely express their opinions...
If you want to cultivate a baby with high emotional intelligence and politeness, this stage is very important.
【Key elements】Social skills, emotional intelligence training
5 to 6 years old
Children have their own ideas about how to deal with the problem, so when you are ready to tell them what to do at this stage, they will naturally ask you "why".
At this age, it is advisable to let the child make more behavioral attempts, do not rush to tell him right or wrong, and let him have a process of reflection, which is important for building the ability to think independently in the future.
At the same time, there is a little bit of heterosexual emotion budding in this age group. This is a good time for sex education, don't be too scared.
【Key elements】Personal opinions, emotional budding
7 to 8 years old
"Like the new and tired of the old" is particularly evident in this age group, where they may quickly become interested in something and then quickly lose interest.
They like to share their knowledge and interests, and they also need to be recognized by the outside world, including: whether I am the first, whether I have been praised for doing good things, and so on. They are aware that their actions have an impact on others and also reflect on their own behavior by observing others.
You may find that the child at this time is like a little adult, and we can consciously praise him for his courage to express his opinion and cultivate his self-confidence.
【Key elements】 Like the new and tired of the old, like to share, eager for affirmation
9 to 10 years old
Eager to communicate with the outside world, has also learned basic communication skills. The need for friendship is particularly strong, and it will feel lonely because of the departure of friends.
But at the same time they also need a certain amount of personal space, and if the parents stare too closely, they will start to have some resistance.
In addition, children between the ages of 9 and 10 are very capable of learning, and creating a good external environment can help them form a healthy psychology.
【Key elements】Desire for friendship, private space
Do I know what the child is thinking? What are children afraid of? Have I overreacted? Do I know my child's social circle? Do I communicate with my children as equals? Have I ignored my child's feelings? ............
When many children have serious psychological problems and even self-harm and other behaviors, everyone will ask: Didn't their parents find their children abnormal? These tragedies can be avoided!
In fact, parents may not be unaware of the problem, but they do not pay attention to those. In the eyes of some parents, grades are the only ones that matter, and others are "not important." And only if we respect the child and are willing to stand in their point of view and try to understand them, the child will naturally trust us.
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